I already posted about how my pain is getting stronger. I have an appointment with CRS on 18.12. so he will see what is happening down there. I hope it is not an infection spread. I do not have temperature or chills yet, but I am much more tired and so horribly sore , like in my bum there is a wide canal (with thick walls and about 10-15 cm long) that is all sore. I have a drilling pain on 5 o clock and schratching pain and burning all around. Also my skin on the outside becomes pink, but I managed to calm this with chamomile tea for now. This pain and burning increased in last 14 days and I tried various ointments to ease the inflammation, so I tried Bepanthen plus too. (and it has antiseptic ingredient clorhexydine hydrocloride) It works good for the first day when I tried it only outside. Than I put it inside and it was good for one day, but the next day it starts to burn and hurts so much. I am so desperate again, afraid that I made something wrong. To ease th epain I applied inside some Zinc oxyde/ bismuth subgalate / lidocaine baby dyper rash cream, that my CRS said is o.k. to use internally. That helps sometimes very much, but sometimes hurts like today, and I am so confused and am loosing my mind. I must put something inside at least coconut oil, otherwise I am burning. Sorry to cry over this again, but I have to write it down. I know you are so sympathetic and understand this hell.
And I have a couple of questions.
I do not have much more pain with BM, I almost never had pain passing stool, like many others here. Maybe it is because my BMs are so soft ? My pain starts about half an hour later and increases thru whole day, It is much worse and rapidly increasing with sitting, or doing anything, and eases a little with resting in bed. Is there somebody who has similar pattern of pain? No special pain with BM, but burning pain increasing after BM and lasting the WHOLE day (I have morning BM).
And my other question. I noticed my stool is thin. It is about a 1 cm in diameter or only like pencil (when it is not to soft and can not remain in shape). Maybe with harder stool I will reach bigger diameter? Can this mean that my spinchter is very tight? My CRS mentioned only medium stenosis.

Hi rio,
I'm sorry to hear you are having all this horrible burning pain right up inside. Have you tried aloe Vera?? Many posters say it helps to soothe them.

As for pain after a bm, not during, yep... Me too. Bm is fine to pass, nice and soft... But 5-10 mins later I start to hurt.... And it lasts all day. My CRS says that is a classic sign of a tight spasming anal sphincter.

Try to get as much rest as possible and really concentrate on relaxing those pelvic muscles.

OMB xx

Thanks OMB for your reply. Yes I apply aloe vera gel too, but it brings just a temporary relief and if I apply it inside it start to sting.
I noticed some other thing too. I have some yellow- green discharge today which smells really bad and it comes out with the "winds" and I have a feeling that it comes out from higher up - rectum, not from anus. I am very sore at the upper end of the anal canal too (sorry to write about something like that, but I am scared). Is it possible that I have an abscess? It is not the first time that I have this, it came out after I was much sore than usual. Is it possible that doctors at he exam (twice) never noticed an abscess? Or may be I have a fistula?

rio..
so sorry to read this... You really need someone to take a thorough and good look in there with a scope to see if they can identify an abscess or fistula. In the meantime, try to keep the things you insert in there to a minimum. Pick maybe just one or two of your favorite soothing things. Does sitting warm water help you at all?

Please keep us updated on how you're doing. It's bad enough to live with all these problems, it's worse when we have no idea what is causing it.

Yes I can not wait till wednesday evening when I ll have the check up. It seems strange to me that six weeks ago CRS could see only a tiny fissure cause all my described problems exist for months. He lookd with the anoscope, but maybe he looked only this 2 cm of the anal canal. I will ask for rectoscopy, hpope they will make it soon.

Hi Rio, I don't know what might be going on, but I'm sorry to hear you're going through this. When my post-bum spasms get really bad, I sometimes jump in the shower to let the warm water relax me. Also I do breathing exercises that help if nothing else give my mind something to focus on along with the pain. Try taking deep breaths in and breathing out sssssss like a snake. Hang in there! Wednesday will be here soon!

Hi Rio....let me just say I literally feel your pain! I'm a registered nurse and thought I'd seen and heard every kind of pain complaint possible throughout my career. Until I developed a clotted (thrombosed) hemorrhoid which burst about 4 weeks ago...just a couple days before i saw my doctor. He told me is was raw and he could see the hole where the clot opened up. Since then, I sometimes still feel like my bowel movements contain shards of glass. I can feel the tearing, shearing, burning pain when I have a BM, some days worse than others. But what baffles me is the excruciating pain I feel after a BM. The anal spasms are not even something I can describe. The pain starts, the anal muscle feels like it tightens and squeezes and then the pain begins. Intense, unrelenting, burning, sharp pain. And it gets worse over the next several hours. I can't focus, or concentrate, and I don't feel like doing a darn thing. I feel like I have to watch every thing I eat. And then I panic, and I sweat from the pain, and then I cry because of both pain and frustration. My poor husband feels so helpless. After a BM, I immediately get into a bathtub of hot water with Epsom Salts, as the salts have a soothing effect on tender raw tissue. I do my best to deep breathe and try to let my backside muscles relax. Easier said than done!! I've increased my fiber and water intake significantly. The one thing I've noticed though, is that I have to be careful not to bulk up my stools too much. The bigger they are, the more pain with defecation. So I use things like over the counter Colace (stool softener WITHOUT a laxative), eat lots of veggie and fruits and when I eat fiber seeds, I make sure they are ground well. Right now, during the healing phase, I'm trying to avoid eating anything that will be rough on the exit. So I've definitely noticed that the size of the stools make a big difference in the pain level. Any amount of slight pushing causes pain. Even passing gas. So keep up the hot baths, and don't lose hope. I started losing hope over the last week or so and I'm forcing myself to get into the right frame of mind and see light at the end of this dark tunnel. You're very lucky not to have the painful movements. But it's certainly very real the pain you're experiencing after your BMs. There is help for all of us if we can get thru the pain and let time heal this horrible disorder.

Best wishes and do keep in touch.

Hi Rio,
I am so sorry the pain is increasing. When I was in hell before my Botox, I had the horrible pain and burning 24/7. It wouldn't let up and I got really low and suicidal. Burning stabbing hell spasm. I had 3 fissures at one point and I do think that pain can get really uncontrollable. Although you say you have a discharge? This needs checking out, it may be you have an infection alongside the Fissure. It is best to get the CRS to have a good look back there to determine what is going on. I can't use anything back there as I am so irritated now. Sitz baths do help a little, but I have that horrible sting back after BM and damn burning. Taking 400mg ibuprofen take the edge off a little. Please keep us posted. Hang in there.... I know it's really hard to. Xxxxxxxxxxxx

Thank you all for your friendly posts. I feel for you all who are in pain. At least we understand each other when it comes to describing the pain.
Welcome Harley Girl! You are unfortunately left with this open hem wound. Was your hemorrhoid internal? Are you able to work with such pain?
And Rachael, it seems I have similar troubles with sensitivity to ointments. I track your posts and hope you will find some relief after such a long period of pain

I have a check up today, because I called the CRS officeearly in the morning, to ask if they can squeeze me in. The nurse asked me if I can come in about an hour of time because someone just canceled the appointment. So I went and had an examination with rectoscope up to 25 cm of the lower rectum and then exam of the anal canal with proctocsope. Dr said the lower rectum seems o.k. as far as he can see and that he can see only enlarged "jucy" internal hemorrhoides, inflamed skin tag and anal canal and the very small anal fissure near the entrance. He could not see an abscess and wondered where the puss may come from. But he said that my pale face colour and ill looks are not good and noted a need for doing a blood tests for my GP dr. He said it could still be something wrong up in the colon and that I shoud have a colonoscopy. Tje exam left me very sore and I still feel like I would have very inflamed open wound on my upper right back side of the anal canal, like there will be some stick pushing in wound and causing immense pain, especially when sitting. It is sure this pain is not from the fissure as I could feel this tiny fissure when he touched it to show the position of it. I feel like it may be something hiding behind those enlarged "juicy" hemorrhoids? who knows. The anal troubles are just horrible mistery.
i am so tired and have to lye down.

Rio, so glad you were checked out...
What is the plan for the Hems? I had mine banded when I had the Botox on the Fissures and I haven't had any since. They can cause a lot of pain and make you uncomfortable. They may shrink on their own, as I am sure you won't be straining on BM. I do hope the bloods comeback normal. It is scary when we don't know what is going on. I would give my right arm right now to put an end to this hell, and I am sure you would. Hang in there my friend. Things will get better, i wish I had a magic wand. Xxxxx