Gay - Anal sex after fistula surgery

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Re: Gay - Anal sex after fistula surgery

Postby waves » 17 May 2017, 04:14

@chillblue
Any updates on your healing? I'm very curious. Is it on good tracks with the healing?
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Re: Gay - Anal sex after fistula surgery

Postby 20yoStudent » 24 May 2017, 19:47

Alright, guess it's finally my turn to tell my story and be a help to someone dealing with what I have.

So, I'll keep this brief and concise as possible. 18, met a guy off Grindr. Before then always practiced a safe sex life. I fell for his charming good looks and his reassurance that letting him engage without a condom would be ok. I always ask if they have a most recent STD record and he did and all was good. So Thank God I am still STD free to this day. I digress, he took me from behind and what started out passionate turned into a nightmare. He acted as if this was his audition tape for a hardcore porn site. I tried as much to relax and I did to a point where I thought all was good. I should add here that I am Diabetic as well. So my sex life and life period has to be 100% careful and always on the safe side for WHATEVER.
Anyways, I digress. A few months later I notice a sore. (Long story short, it was an perinial-abscess) I tracked my hookups down since I have a chart and only guy i hooked up with without a condom was him November in 2014. I should have been home with family that thanksgiving week but , I like any other single person not in a relationship and wanting that human contact, was horny.
So sometime in 2015 I went to the ER and they drained this abscess. Which started to look promising. Mind you all, I have not bottomed since 2014, but I've topped all who were ok with a guy not having a huge penis that everyone wants. But I managed and all my hookups were more than once. ;) lol I digress. (WITH A CONDOM)
So long story short, it didn't heal and for all of 2015-2017 of February. I delt with small drainage , no pain, just annoyance. It turned into a fistula. Thanks to my parents and I president Obama I got healthcare. I had been working my butt off to improve my life, diet, exercise and sex life. Yes this was a regret but I wanted to live my life. And I took this serious after being told I needed surgery and I said yes to an Anal- Fistulotomy. Now to dive into that without all my banter like above.

I was told I had a superficial Anal fissure. Honestly don't know what that changes but sounds better when he says "because of that, we don't have go deeper..or do this or do that" when the doctor says anything relative to that. It means celebration...at least for me here. But just like swimmerboy93 I had a lot of issues the same. However I don't have chrohns, I have a very good diet. My only issue is Diabetes. Which I am getting under control to better promote healing and to steer away from anything else damaging to my Body. I am 2 days post operation. So I can't answer any questions about after surgery just yet. All I can say is, when I took a picture of my butt, there was a hole. And I took all my confidence and believed in myself that I can do this and this can completely heal. Not because I want to rush to have sex again but to freaking be healthy and not make mistakes like this because it could have been a whole lot worse with my current health condition.
So I'll be here updating anyone who asks and I would love to know what else can promote healing. I saw coconut oil somewhere. So for anyone who is unsure about where I am still.
2014: Anal Abbcess forms on diabetic after bad sex
2015: Anal Abbcess ruptures, ER visit drains said abcess
Mid 2015: doesn't heal 100% and turns into a Anal Fisure which happens to be common.
Mid 2015-2017: During this time I treated what I did not know as best as I could, and saw doctors constantly. Until a colorectal surgeon in Feb of 2017 finally says "hey that's a fistula, let's do surgery"
May 2017: surgeon says it's superficial and my operation was "textbook perfect" as the doctor says since I took up very good care of my issue. Just took a minute to get a clear diagnosis. Was on the operating table for about 18 mins. now I am 2 Days post op and I'm ready to get this out of my life Completely. I am not in much pain right now.
And am taking my medicine as directed and stool softened. And since I changed my lifestyle prior I am eating what I did before. BMs are ok. But I need more time to give a clear statement there.

About me: I was a Bottom. Now, I am more top vets. I stayed a bottom Because of my "size". But I learned to conquer that and have had many compliments and safe sex. I am once again diabetic so must be more cautious and careful. I am in college and soon will pursue other opportunities for school. I am glad this has been done, and I'm ready for the next few months to be promising. Abstaining from sex is now much more a Prority. But because of my versatile status I will soon enough want to figure out bottoming. And I will post updates as much as I can about the healing process after my Anal Fistulotomy.

Thanks for reading guys! Once again please I'll answer any questions and take any advice on promotion of healing to the area.
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Re: Gay - Anal sex after fistula surgery

Postby waves » 25 May 2017, 06:03

hey 20yoStudent,
Thanks a lot for your story. Please let us know about any progress with your healing. I'm very curious how fast and well it heals off!
I'm still dealing with nagging pain from my fissure (since March 2016). It's not terrible but it's strong enough that I can't ignore it.
I just made an appointment this week at another specialist since I feel like in the other hospital I went a few times I am not treated well enough. Usually they only have assistant doctors doing the examinations and then they leave the room to get advice from the senior docots. Then they come back and basically just tell me that the senior doctor told them (without him examine me in person at all).
I really don't know if this will heal off by itself at all that's why I finally need a "real" examination to get some real help about what my options are etc.
So your surgery was not a LIS was it? I'm terrifdied of getting a LIS because of the potential incontinence that might happen years later.
Cheers,
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Re: Gay - Anal sex after fistula surgery

Postby chillblue » 25 May 2017, 21:32

wow 20yostudent. What a story. I hope you get better.

Waves, things are good. Tomorrow will mark a month since surgery. The discharge stopped last week and I am healing. I am still doing stool softeners and fiber supplement after every meal to keep things soft. Pain with bowel movements are minimal. Feels like a sharp pain but as long as I keep things soft it doesn't hurt much, and I have some blood still but its just spots. I also find that putting some vaseline on and in the anus before a bowel movement helps to take some of the edge of when it hits the incision. its only been 4 weeks, im hoping to be totally back to normal by week 10. I can tell the incision is healing. It still sore, but i can actually stick my finger up there without much pain so thats a good sign. I can also tell things open up a lot more when i go, which also helps. Haven't had any incontinence of any kind. Farting is much easier lol......so thats pretty much where I am. Have you had any change of heart about getting the surgery??
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Re: Gay - Anal sex after fistula surgery

Postby waves » 26 May 2017, 12:15

chillblue, great to hear that it's healing although the process sounds quite painful to me :(

I've contacted another expert for an appointment this week but they haven't responded yet. Thing is, I'm most of the day almost pain-free. Just today I was completely pain free until just half an hour ago (now it's 19:15). Now I feel it a bit again. It's like a damp pain. It usually starts when I sit for a while and the muscles in my butt are stretched from the sitting. Other than that no pain, no blood, nothing. I can even put my finger in and rub at the tear and it's zero painful.
That's why I'm really hesitant about getting anything cut open now. I really need to know from a true expert if that tear I still have will be healing (closing) by itself eventually or not. If it's not going to close up anyways I guess I have no choice but surgery but if there's any hope I think I will just wait it out (which is always better than getting anything cut open down there)

Keep us posted about your healing progress!
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Re: Gay - Anal sex after fistula surgery

Postby kondado » 31 May 2017, 14:13

20yoStudent wrote:Alright, guess it's finally my turn to tell my story and be a help to someone dealing with what I have.


Thank you!! I'm about to get fistula surgery the 8th of June. The MRI indicated it's a simple intersphinteric fistula, so it should be something simple. I'm still a bit worried because I have two "openings" or holes, and I just hope they can fix everything in one single surgery. My surgeon said they wouldn't now 100% sure until the surgery...

You said you have a "hole" after your surgery... is it very deep? I hope you heal well! (Maybe you could upload a pic of it? Don't know if it's allowed)
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Re: Gay - Anal sex after fistula surgery

Postby waves » 27 Jun 2017, 02:12

hey chillblue, haben't heard from you in a month. How is your healing progress?
I guess no news is good news I assume?

I'm having some fissure pain again after my last gym session on Sunday. Ugh really, I am so done with this... have an appointment on July 19th with a specialist (way too long waiting time!).
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Re: Gay - Anal sex after fistula surgery

Postby kondado » 27 Jun 2017, 12:30

Hi folks,

dunno if anyone is interested (doesn't seem so), so I'll keep my story short. Got my fistula surgery on the 8th of June. So around 18 days have passed now. Finally it were actually two fistulas or to be more precise, one pilonidal sinus infection and one high transsphinteric fistula. The sinus (upper part of the butt crack, so to speak) was cut open and cleaned out -- big awful wound, and for the actual fistula I got a seton, which sucks. All in all the pain was bearable, but I hope to get this sorted out and to never have to experience this sh*t again! My surgeon hasn't tightened the seton as of yet, I think he's going with the "loose cutting seton" technique, don't know if he's going to tighten it on the next visit. Last time he told me he wasn't going to tighten it on that occasion cause "it would feel like someone is pulling on your balls, and there's nothing you can take (pills) to relieve the pain". Idk what to make of all this...
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Re: Gay - Anal sex after fistula surgery

Postby chillblue » 28 Jun 2017, 23:37

Hi Waves. I am feeling alot better. I haven't seen any blood with bowel movements, but i do still itch at the incision site occasionally. I still feel tight down there to me. I can stick my finger in there but it feels as tight as it did before and i thought it would be more loose than before surgery. The incision site is still somewhat tender, so i assume it is still healing which is why its itching. But i had itching in that spot before surgery so i'm not sure. But overall i am not in pain. I dont feel the surgery made matters better or worse. Im just hoping i can finally have anal sex without bleeding when this is all said and done.
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Re: Gay - Anal sex after fistula surgery

Postby waves » 03 Jul 2017, 01:30

kondado, that sounds horrible. I hope you're getting well soon! never heard of that loose cutting seton technique before...
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