Hello everyone, I just joined this group and wanted to share my story! I really appreciate everyone who took the time to create and post on this forum. It really is helpful to know you aren't alone while dealing with this uncomfortable experience.

I was diagnosed with a fistula after dealing with a peri anal abscess for about a year now. It started developing when I got a tiny cut, it developed into an abscess. I was in a lot of pain and eventually went to the ER because of the extreme pain. For some reason the ER doctor decided that she didn't want to cut and drain the abscess even though she said she noticed it starting to tunnel. I've never has an abscess before so I took her word, and took the antibiotics she gave me. I thought it had popped and drained after a few days. However after multiple follow up visits with my pcp ( who thought it was just granulated tissue on the surface of the skin) who decided to cauterize it, but after multiple tries, she sent me to a general surgeon due to the lack of healing.

*This surgeon was awful and was extremely rude, however she decided to cut the abscess and found a tunnel. I was instructed to pack it with gauze which was extremely painful and turned out to be a waste of time because she misdiagnosed me. Long story short I had her refer me to a second surgeon for a second opinion.

* I saw the second surgeon and she decided to do an anal exam, they usually do this when the put you out for surgery because of how uncomfortable it is. She did find a fistula. It was a mid level and she was concerned that I'd have incontinence issue if she didn't use a cutting Seton.

* I had asked a lot of questions, but in hindsight, she didn't explain it very well and didn't give me an accurate estimation of how long I would need to take off work.

* I had the surgery and everything went well and I initially thought that this would be easy to get through. I was wrong. The first two days I was feeling okay and there wasn't a ton of pain but eventually the pain started and since then I haven't been able to stand, walk, sit, work or sleep for long periods of time because the pain is so horrible. Every time I get a shower, at least once a day the tape that's holding the rubber band falls off so my husband has to re-tighten it.

*So after dealing with extreme pain I finally saw my surgeon and told her about all the issues I was having, I explained in detail that I needed to be back to work soon and I'd like to explore different treatments for pain management. She indirectly said no and proceeded to examine the Seton. She didn't have any regard for the amount of pain I was having as she not so delicately pulled and moved the band to tighten it. I literally started crying from the amount of pain! I started bleeding and the pain skyrocketed. I stayed in bed for two days straight, I couldn't move. It even hurt to be laying there! The surgeon said I just needed to stick it out and then she would just cut it out... So that's where were standing now.

* Advice: Use an ice pack. It numbs the area and calms the swelling. Other than that I would recommend using a stool softener regularly so you don't cause yourself excess pain and swelling. BM's do hurt. Also when you wash the area take your time, so you don't end up bumping the wound. For everyone going through this uncomfortable experience, you'll get through it! Hang in there! Good luck to everyone!