In a lot of pain, but something funny happened(beware TMI!!)

Discuss any questions, problems or share your solutions here...

Return to General Anal Fissure Discussion



In a lot of pain, but something funny happened(beware TMI!!)

Postby garwha » 12 Apr 2011, 14:21

Let me begin with this is entirely true. No names have been used to protect the innocent. Read at your own risk.
So my surgery was last Wednesday. By Saturday night I still had not had a successful bowel movement. My mom is an RN, she suggested Milk of Magnesia. So I decided I must do it. I reviewed the instructions. "Take 2-4 Tablespoons, One Time Daily." I wanted to be conservative, so I took 2 tablespoons. After about 2 hours of waiting...nothing. I thought to myself, "should have done the entire 4 tablespoons." I took 2 more tablespoons. Two hours later...NOTHING! My butt hurt due to the pressure of constipation. I WAS GOING TO POOP! Down the hatch, four more tablespoons. Nearly three hours later, my wife asked if I read the instructions. "Of course I did. I am not an idiot." Clearly, the bottle says to take 2-4 tablespoons, one time daily." "Did you drink 8 oz of water with it, honey." "Oops, I am an idiot!" Well, the pain was still on like Donkey Kong!!! I MUST POOP!!! So, I did it. I followed the instructions to a Tee! (well, except the part about only 2-4 tablespoons a day.) I took 4 more tablespoons WITH water. An hour later, the relief was setting in. I felt a poo coming. I rush to the bathroom, drop my pants, turn to sit and.........I remodeled the bathroom. Like Mt. Vesuvius erupting, my ass became a yard sprinkler splattering everything within a ten foot radius. The pain caused me to go in and out of consciousness. Fuzzy waves of a dark chocolaty pudding dripped from the mirror, from the sink, from the faucet and from the toilet. My wife came running into the bathroom after hearing screams that surely sounded like the grim reaper was ripping me from limb to limb. I have always been a VERY private toilet person. I will not let my wife near the restroom while I am doing my business. This day has forever changed me. My wife drew a bath while I finished up the remodel. With tears streaming down my face, I told her I would clean it up in a bit. Fortunately for me, and me only, my saintly wife restored our bathroom to its' original format while I was soaking.
Today marks the seventh day since my multiple surgeries. While I do not feel better at all yet, I believe it is my duty as a fellow sufferer to shed some humor (at my expense) to this board!
garwha
Fibre Addict
 
Posts: 15
Topics: 6
Joined: 10 Apr 2011, 16:00
Has thanked: 0 time
Been thanked: 0 time
Gender: None specified

Re: In a lot of pain, but something funny happened(beware TMI!!)

Postby pinky » 12 Apr 2011, 14:28

Hi Garwha,
That's funny.Poor you,it must be terrible.
It does take time to feel better.please read instructions before taking it and do give it time to work.
keep doing everything right,the usual soft fibre diet,lots of water,sitz bath and laxatives and pain killers if u need any.
Good recovery
pinky
Fissureologist
 
Posts: 427
Topics: 6
Joined: 03 Sep 2008, 16:00
Has thanked: 0 time
Been thanked: 0 time
Gender: None specified

Re: In a lot of pain, but something funny happened(beware TMI!!)

Postby Savaici » 12 Apr 2011, 17:00

At least you can laugh!! Truly a step in the right direction. I don't know if laughter is the best medicine as the saying goes... The person who said that has probably never gone through the various hells of having a sore rear. I take MOM too, but not that much!! Good on your wife!! My hubby's good with my moaning about pain. Never has a bad word to say. Amazing patience that I am not sure that I am capable of. Get better very soon.
Savaici
Administrator
 
Posts: 3833
Topics: 222
Joined: 03 Feb 2011, 17:00
Has thanked: 170 times
Been thanked: 260 times
Gender: Female

Re: In a lot of pain, but something funny happened(beware TMI!!)

Postby Deleted User 579 » 12 Apr 2011, 17:06

Dear Garwa - I just posted my sad tale of my visit to my CRS, which, as I describe, left me in a bit of a state. I had just finised having a good cry when I read your post. I just want to thank you for sharing your story with such great humour. I haven't had a good laugh like that for a long time.
I am so sorry that the episode hurt you so much and that you are still in a lot of pain. You are a real hero to be so funny about it! I really hope you start feeling better very soon.
Deleted User 579
 

Re: In a lot of pain, but something funny happened(beware TMI!!)

Postby ss616 » 12 Apr 2011, 17:42

Only problem with such a funny story is it hurts my AF to laugh.... Image
Hang in their folks...
ss616
Salt Bather
 
Posts: 71
Topics: 12
Joined: 07 Apr 2011, 16:00
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Has thanked: 0 time
Been thanked: 0 time
Gender: None specified

Re: In a lot of pain, but something funny happened(beware TMI!!)

Postby garwha » 12 Apr 2011, 22:06

Laughing seems to be the root of a lot of my pain right now. All that I have been doing is surfing the net for funny sites. I laugh and cry in pain at the same time. My wife looks at me like I am a maniac. But, without laughter, I think that I would be too depressed to do anything. I really appreciate this site. It gives me incredible hope that the surgical pain, while unbearable at times, will subside giving me back my life.
garwha
Fibre Addict
 
Posts: 15
Topics: 6
Joined: 10 Apr 2011, 16:00
Has thanked: 0 time
Been thanked: 0 time
Gender: None specified

Re: In a lot of pain, but something funny happened(beware TMI!!)

Postby andy1505 » 13 Apr 2011, 01:16

Hi Garwha,
I am new to this forum as have just been diagnosed with a fissure that will be treated using Botox, but the appointment is not until June 21st 2011!!!
I have a very similar story which happened over 15 years ago, i have always found it hard to go to the toilet when it comes to BM. This one year i hadn't gone for about a week, my stomach was bloated and i felt real bad, so off i went to the local chemist and they suggested syrup of figs!!!
Anyway to cut a long story short, like you i thought i read the bottle, so i took 2 tablespoons of the syrup of figs, the next morning my stomach was signing a tune to me it was making so much noise, i thought to myself its worked and i should be able to have a BM, boy how wrong was i, i could not get off the toilet all day!! by the time i had finished i was well and truly wiped out and felt really ill, i took a look at the bottle of syrup of figs to see if it had any side effects, this is when i saw my error, the 2 tablespoons should have been teaspoons so i had overdosed of syrup of figs, the family have never let me live this down, it was not a nice day at all so i can hear where you are coming from.
Hope the pain gets better soon, take care
Andy
andy1505
Salt Bather
 
Posts: 53
Topics: 10
Joined: 01 Apr 2011, 16:00
Location: UK
Has thanked: 0 time
Been thanked: 0 time
Gender: None specified

Re: In a lot of pain, but something funny happened(beware TMI!!)

Postby garwha » 13 Apr 2011, 09:54

Andy,
After your story and mine combined, I have decided to dedicate the rest of my life to thoroughly reading all directions. Like the saying goes, measure twice, cut once.
garwha
Fibre Addict
 
Posts: 15
Topics: 6
Joined: 10 Apr 2011, 16:00
Has thanked: 0 time
Been thanked: 0 time
Gender: None specified

Re: In a lot of pain, but something funny happened(beware TMI!!)

Postby alpinestrawberry » 13 Apr 2011, 11:39

Image Image Image
I loved your story. Have you read the Bob the Anal Fissure one? If not, better google it!! Image
Most of us think 'new tile' when it comes to remodeling, but now, I never will again... Image
alpinestrawberry
Proctosphincteranalogist
 
Posts: 367
Topics: 17
Joined: 19 Jan 2011, 17:00
Location: Michigan
Has thanked: 0 time
Been thanked: 1 time
Gender: None specified

Re: In a lot of pain, but something funny happened(beware TMI!!)

Postby garwha » 13 Apr 2011, 13:37

Loved the story of Bob!!! I will pass it along to everyone that I know. Image
garwha
Fibre Addict
 
Posts: 15
Topics: 6
Joined: 10 Apr 2011, 16:00
Has thanked: 0 time
Been thanked: 0 time
Gender: None specified


  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Return to General Anal Fissure Discussion



Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests