Hi Everyone! I'm new to the forum so I wanted to write to introduce myself and share a bit about my AF experience thus far. My AF tore occurred on Aug. 1st of this year. I know the precise date, because it was just a few days after I had taken the MCAT. I'm convinced that the stress I was under at the time because of the exam is what caused the BM that put me in this mess. Anyways, so I experienced some pain with each BM that followed but nothing that really made me take too much notice, but the following week things began to get a lot worse so I made an appointment to visit my primary physician. She took a look at my bum, performed a digital exam and concluded that it was probably an anal fissure, seeing as she could feel for herself that my bum was pretty tight. She recommended a stool softener regimen and prescribed some hydrocortisone but said that I would need to see a gastroenterologist for further help. That appointment was literally the day right before I was going to head out to Las Vegas for a vacation with my husband that had been planned months in advance. I was really such a hot mess. When I got home I was so stressed out by my pain and by the situation in general that I gave myself a nosebleed. While I did my best to enjoy the trip it was certainly dampered by my anal fissure.
So when I got back I was still in pain but was pretty busy with getting ready for school again. Honestly, I think that a part of me was hoping that the problem would get better on it's own with the stool softener and hydrocortisone but it didn't get any better so I made an appointment to see a Gastro doc. He confirmed what my primary had already told me, that it was indeed an AF. He prescribed twice daily nitroglycerin and advised me to replace the stool softeners with fiber. BIG MISTAKE! Things got even worse. I was pretty much hysterical about a week after that visit when I tried to poop and was hit by soo much pain and a pretty good amount of bleeding. And that was from just attempting to poop. It was so bad that my mom was so worried after speaking to me on the phone that she contacted the Gastro office and had one of the care providers call me.
The next day I went back into the office and was seen that time by a physician's assistant. She told me that the doctor shouldn't have told me to replace the stool softener with the fiber, because fiber acts by bulking up your stool. I was pretty pissed to hear that. She pretty much told me to keep up with the nitro, restart the stool softener, cut out the fiber and to try doing sitz baths before applying the nitro. She also prescribed me some lidocaine jelly to apply immediately before a BM. A few days after following this I did begin to see a consistent improvement that lasted for about a week and a half.
This past Wednesday I had another follow up with the PA and told her that I had finally started to get better and that I was having BM's that were either pain-free or that occurred with very little pain. Well, I must have jinked myself because later that night I had a BM which re-aggravated the tear and although the pain that I've felt since has not been as excruciating as some of the pain I experience early on, it has nevertheless been very disheartening.
This condition has really disrupted my life in a major way. I've hardly been eating and have lost about 20 lbs in the past 2 months. I pretty much live in fear of having to poop outside of my house. This is my last year of college and I'm taking a pretty heavy load of courses, which is stressful in and of itself. But I think that the emotional toll has really been the hardest to deal with. I have honestly been very depressed over this ordeal but finding this forum and realizing that I'm not alone in this AF boat from hell is certainly comforting. I wish you all a pain-free day!
-Sarah

Hi Sarah - a very big welcome to you!
Your story is all too familiar! As your fissure is still in it's acute stage (only just!) you may still be able to heal with conservative methods alone, but if it carries on, you may need some medical help like botox, or LIS.
Sorry you're suffering - but you've come to the right place for help and advice!

Good luck, I know all about those "highs" last saturday was one of those days for me. It was quickly stomped out Sunday when when a passed a baseball bat. I hope you see improvement soon.