okay, i am not alone, i am sure.
but ever since i got this my will to live life has gone out the door.
i don't want to date, make plans, etc.
i never know how i am going to be feeling.
i have gone from being a happy, attractive women to someone compulsively trying to stay out of pain and it's random and confusing, what with bad days, good days, etc.
how do others find the strength to carry on?

The fact is beach girl…it can always be worse! I lost a very good friend of mine due to cancer. I have several business associates who are having their own health issues.
The fact is…if this is the worst medical thing to happen to me in my life….WOW I am one lucky SOB. In most cases this can be almost 100% taken care of by having and AD or an LIS…so while it sucks now…get a grip girl! There are many more out there that are worse then you are and while this sucks and it does…I am grateful this is it….

..

yes that's true, Wecc... but logic doesn't dry my tears. i still have deep compassion for others. and tremendous respect for those who seem to cope better than i.
by the way, have you had your AD yet?
i asked my crs and of course she is against it.
i did some research and while it appeals to me on many levels, i wonder if you can have an LIS after that...?
plus it is a concern to me that so few offer them.
my crs is very holistic and i trust that she would if she could.
anyway i am quite interested in how things turn out for you? and wish the best for you. when is your AD scheduled?

Aw Beachgirl, I really know how your feel! What Wecc says is true, but it's also true that you are going through one of the worst things anyone can go through. Even though it's not life threatening, it is definitely life-altering, and our quality of life deteriorates significantly. You are definitely entitled to feel blue.
I was in some very dark places when I was suffering, and it was a real struggle to keep going. It's hard to live when you don't see a future without pain, and you don't see a future of laughing and having fun again. But please believe me when I say that you can get your life back.
If I'm not mistaken, you've tried botox recently (?). It's not uncommon for that to work after a while; but it's also not uncommon for folks to move on to an LIS after giving the botox a good try. If that's what you have to face, then please be reassured that the LIS gave many of us our lives back. I am an example. I am now enjoying my life again, and I'm so grateful because I honestly never thought I'd laugh again. I was where you are and I really understand where you're coming from. Just please remember that you have options and you don't have to live like this forever. You will get your life back again. Hang in there!

thank you, hopetoheal, i feel encouraged by your words.
i have a few other life-altering medical struggles, not just this. i have really appreciated the kindness that people have shared with me on this board, and the helpful advice. it's meant so much to me.
and it's always true that there are people better off than we are, and worse off than we are.
and yes there are many things i have to be very grateful for, of course.

Hi there Beachgirl…how is it going today…feeling better at all??? My AD is on January 4th and of course I will let you know how it goes.
I had an appointment for an LIS till I found this doctor. The fact is, I decided not to go this route because this CRS was named one of the top doctors in the NY area two years in a row. I did not decide not to do this route because he is affiliated with two major hospital, one being the largest teaching hospital in NY. I did not decide to go ahead with this because he told me he had preformed over 400 LIS in the past and for the most part would much rather do an AD because there really are not complications and there is no cutting involved. What made me decide to go forward with this is talking with about 8 of his patients in his waiting room. Both male and female, from 25- 60. Every one said they were so happy they did not go the LIS route. Everyone like the part that is no chance of infection because there is no cutting. Most were back to work in about a week with very little pain. I meet two people who had this done on Friday and were back to work on Monday.
When you said your CRS did not suggest an AD. Gee why I am I not surprized. Just maybe they are not trained how to do this AD and the fact is how do they make their living? LIS is most likely taught school and during their surgical residency, this form of AD most likely is not. Meaning the CRS would have to go out and get trained after the fact. Also the fact is, many countries have socialized medicine, which I am not in favor of. As you can see in many posts, people waiting for months to see a CRS or any doctor for that matter. However with that said, our medical community is for profit, just look at how the same prescription is 40% less outside the U. S. CRS are indeed surgeons and just maybe there is more money when a CRS performs a LIS rather than an AD. Simply because there is more involved. I do not know why this new method is not more mainstream. In many other developed countries CRS do not favor LIS, In Germany for the most part they would never do an LIS, they do AD using a balloon. Same thing in Japan.
In effect it does the same thing as a LIS. One they cut to reduce the resting anal pressure so that the fissure can heal and the other they stretch it. There are many on this site that have done very well with an LIS and there are almost as many that had compactions. I for one would much rather not get cut and try something that is much less invasive. You know what, I can always go the LIS route if this does not work. Believe me, I am not anti- doctor or anti -medical establishment. While we need to work on getting health care for all…I still believe we have one of the best health care systems in the world, and in many cases some of the greatest technology

Hi wecc, and thank you for your thoughtful reply! Are you referring to Dr. Sohn's clinic in NYC? Anyway I would LOVE to avoid LIS if I can; but I'm concerned that there are so few CRS or gastroenterologists doing standardized AD in the US. I would think insurance carriers would love to cover AD if the cost is lower (including the cost of surgical sequellae); and large employers (who are paying the cost of insurance) would love to get their employees back on the job as quickly as possible. In fact, the ACRS textbook does cite some decent studies of standardized AD and even seems rather complementary but (not surprisingly) come down in favor of properly done LIS anyway.
In fact, UpToDate, a peer-reviewed medical textbook (very highly regarded by physicians) just published a general surgery text which (though directed to surgeons) comprehensively reviewed non-surgical and surgical treatments. They seem to have misunderstood AD (most of the material was about the Lord Procedure and the rest of their discussion of AD seems to have missed the point). To me this widespread lack of intelligent, evidence-based discussion of standardized AD is noteworthy. But maybe my point of view is US-centric. Maybe there are good, peer-reviewed evidence based studies, and much more experience, outside the US and would appreciate knowing about that as I have a good friend who is a medical informaticist and specializes in evaluating the quality of evidence behind studies.
Anyway thanks again for your insights and thoughts... and much gratitude for this Forum!! Your posts of AD led me to study this route in the first place, and I thank you for that. I am still open minded.
One more thing: my CRS does micro-banding for hemmies, which is far cheaper than hemmeroidectomies. And less painful. Painless, practically! The recovery time is a few days, too! Not painful months and months. That's how I met her.
So I don't think all doctors are just in it for the bucks, even though you do make an excellent point (translated: when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail!) Ie people, including doctors, do what they are trained to do. But if there was money to be made in healing AF's another way, a better way, and good data to back it, I think some doctors would go for this route and make a fortune! and skip the surgery.
So... let's bring on the data.
I think there is just a huge risk in doing something not well studied just because the alternative isn't great. So... studies, anyone?

Hi BG…you are correct about Dr. Sohn. However he retired I believe last year. There are CRS that practice his method. Like you, I did much research. As I believe I stated in one of my post, I work for a German company and am there several times a year. The executive assistant of the managing directors husband is a surgeon, not a CRS. Having known her for years, I have a great relationship with her and her husband. So last time I was there in August, I was at their house for dinner and told him about my “issue” giving at that time I was in the 7-8 pain bracket. He told me that he is somewhat familiar with the balloon method they use in most of the hospitals. The next morning he spoke with a CRS at his hospital. It is very interesting what his response was….
The balloon method has been preformed for about 15 years with a 90% cure rate and very little complications. In severe case it has to be preformed twice, with about a 95% cure rate. About 5 years ago LIS started becoming more popular. What is interesting is according to this German CRS, many hospitals and younger CRS went back to the balloon AD method simply because there were more documented case of complications the with LIS. The AD method was much less invasive, with no chance on infection. In addition, he said that the overall costs are 40% less!!!
The fact is the balloon method is basically the same method as Dr. Sohn's One uses a balloon and the other use for a better lack of words a very big dildo. So while an LIS is said to be the “gold standard” here, it’s not in many other places outside the U.S. So my question becomes….why is that????? Fact is, Germany and Japan’s technology in many cases is on the same level as our if not surpass it. Much of the medical equipment used here is designed and made in Germany and Japan….interesting? If you look at the posts here while many have had a great success with an LIS, you still see many that are in pain, bleeding, still have issues a year later
I am by no means saying all Doctors are in it for the bucks. The fact is, my father was GP. However let be real here…the associated cost are insane. Malpractice insurance alone is 30-50% or more of a practice!!!! Then factor in all the other costs. Then we live in the world of managed care where most Dr are told what they will be paid. Much of it has to with training and the culture. Doctors like most any profession are comfortable with what they were trained in and many times if it’s not broken, why fix it.
Anyway…I have to get ready for work. I wish all that read this a very happy holiday and a New Year that is filled with peace, health and happiness. As my 13 year old daughter says….peace out!

thanks, wecc...
totally agree with you on many, many scores.
please keep us informed on your procedure and you KNOW we are all hoping the VERY BEST outcome for you! maybe this will be the start of something very new.