Embarrassing question?

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Embarrassing question?

Postby khemphill » 06 Jan 2014, 13:20

Hi everyone...
Not sure if this is a stupid question or not, but if me and my boyfriend have vaginal sex, will any of those 'fluids' leak into my anus? I don't want to make my fissures any worse, that's all.
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Re: Embarrassing question?

Postby Scientist2516 » 06 Jan 2014, 17:27

Not a stupid question at all. A lot of people get worried by sex when they have fissures.
No, I don't think fluids will leak into your anus - they could trickle back there and make it wet, I suppose, so keep tissues handy to wipe up afterwards.
I don't think any of your fluids will harm your anus, it's just best to keep the area dry.
You could also put some barrier cream, vaseline or the like, on your anus to protect it during sex, and wipe the whole area clean afterwards.
Not so romantic or spontaneous, unfortunately, but there are worse problems to have.
Some people find that the muscle contractions of orgasm hurt their sphincter (I have not had a problem with this myself), so be careful.
I hope your boyfriend knows about the fissures and is really understanding and gentle?
Nifedipine/lidocaine, no help
Diltiazem, effective, but caused major rash
Nitroglycerine, effective.
Topical estrogen for final healing.
Gentle heat to bottom - pain relief, muscle relaxant
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Time - lots of time.
Status - Healed!
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Re: Embarrassing question?

Postby khemphill » 08 Jan 2014, 16:50

Thanks for replying. I have an anxiety disorder so I've been constantly worrying about my fissures haha. And yes he completely understands and is very patient. :)
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Re: Embarrassing question?

Postby havefaith » 08 Jan 2014, 20:58

khemphill i have DEVELOPED anxiety due to worrying about fissures. let me just say you are very brave, and strong to do that for your boyfriend. I have only had sex with my girlfriend 3 times in the last 4 months and i am a 29 year old male. I feel terrible for it, but the pain really does prevent me.

as far as fluids go, just ensure you have some babywipes there to mop up in case. i hope things go well.
I have faith in you always, i love you like my own son or daughter, when you hurt, i hurt. Let us all be each others guiding light, and heal without anxiety :) Much love to all.
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Re: Embarrassing question?

Postby Girraphne » 11 Aug 2022, 10:56

I was going to say the same thing as havefaith, my anxiety is through the roof due to this ailment!My boyfriend has been very understanding and gentle with me, but I'm the one who wants to have sex even though orgasm my send me into spasms...I have learned that I just have to do a sitz bath immediately afterward to calm the muscles down, and lately that has been working so far...although it has actually only been 2 times since I've started that tactic. This post is a few years old..but oh well, let's see if anyone is still around :) Wishing you all the best!
Jan 2022 - fissure diagnosed, dr said it looked like it was superficial and almost healed.
July 2022- got constipated while traveling, retear.
Working on a diet and bathroom regimen to help healing. Using nifedipine/lidocaine cream and a&d ointment.
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Re: Embarrassing question?

Postby Sufferingbadly » 09 Oct 2023, 13:31

Girraphne wrote:I was going to say the same thing as havefaith, my anxiety is through the roof due to this ailment!My boyfriend has been very understanding and gentle with me, but I'm the one who wants to have sex even though orgasm my send me into spasms...I have learned that I just have to do a sitz bath immediately afterward to calm the muscles down, and lately that has been working so far...although it has actually only been 2 times since I've started that tactic. This post is a few years old..but oh well, let's see if anyone is still around :) Wishing you all the best!


Are you still dealing with your issue? I’m afraid to have sex for the same reason as you. If I’m stimulated at all, my muscles go into spasm and it hurts the next day. Sometimes it goes away fast, other times it turns out bad.
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Re: Embarrassing question?

Postby Girraphne » 09 Oct 2023, 17:09

I’m so much better now but still have to stay in top of my diet and bowel regimen and it seems like i have some major motility issues because i have trouble evacuating completely. I still have to mindfully relax after sex the best way to do that for me is to get in bathtub as hot as i can handle it and do breathing exercises. I hope it gets better for you!
Jan 2022 - fissure diagnosed, dr said it looked like it was superficial and almost healed.
July 2022- got constipated while traveling, retear.
Working on a diet and bathroom regimen to help healing. Using nifedipine/lidocaine cream and a&d ointment.
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