Hello AF Board Community,
It is nice to know there are others out there who share my frustration and struggle, though I wouldn't wish it on my cruelest enemy.
Turns out I've been dealing with AF's for the last couple years. Everyone once in a while I would have a bad BM, usually after lots of drinking and junk food, and there would be pain for days after. Eventually the pain would subside thought - I thought at the time I was dealing with recurring hemorrhoids, but as it turns out I have definitely been having episodes of recurrent AF.
I finally understood last year what I was dealing with. I had a really bad attack right before my wedding, and really struggled through my honeymoon. It was pretty brutal.
That was my last serious eruption. At that time the pain was CONSTANT. I would go day-to-day with constant pain, I was usually at a 2 out of 10 all day, and it would go up to a 4 or 5 after a BM, and then sometimes if it was a bad one, I'd have to endure around 5 hours of THROBBING pain sometimes like at 6 or 7. I'd have to just sit on some ice packs in bed and totally disassociate, I couldn't do anything in this state.
Last year I could feel how the trauma was causing severe spasming of the sphincter, so all my BM's were so so painful. And the pain just throbbed for hours after. I felt like a caged animal when I would have to hold it together at work after an ill-timed BM, or if I was stuck driving somewhere. And everytime I went, more trauma to the injury. I'm so grateful to have an extremely compassionate and understanding wife - I do not know if I could have maintained my sanity without her support.
Since that time however I have made tremendous progress in terms of my symptoms. Through the employment of various conservative approaches, I have been able promote healing and pretty much eliminate most/all my debilitating symptoms. I don't have all day long pain anymore, and I don't have throbbing pain after BM's. I can lead a normal life, and I'm so grateful for that.
I do however still bleed when I make a BM. I feel like the injury isn't at the anus any more though. It's strange, the anus feels pretty much healed, but as I healed I started to develop a sentinel pile, right below the 6 o'clock region. I thought this would subside with time but so far it has not. And the pile is where I have blood. When I wipe I'll inspect the tissue, and I don't see blood where I wipe my anus - Its the surrounding area below the fissure site that leaves marks on the tissue. I don't have any more irritation at the anus at all, it feels totally healed, but the pile below will bleed regularly.
I wanted to join this community and hopefully share what worked for me, and find insight on how to find fully recovery and get rid of this pile for good. I feel I've come so far, just a few more miles to go.