Hi, guys,

So it's been almost 9 months since my little friend decided to make an appearance. Just to re-cap: this is a fissure I developed after birthing my son last September. Still unsure if it happened because of constipation or from the horrific labor I went through. Anyway, I tried diltiazem but it gave me a rash. Then started Rectiv but I stopped because of the headaches. Here's my issue:

The first 5 months were terrible. Pain everyday. But things have gotten significantly better, except the fissure is still there.

In the beginning my physician told me it was so deep she could see the muscle. I was pretty much signed up for surgery except a bout of the norovirus had me reschedule. Then, for whatever reason, the spasms got less and less. My most recent check-up I was told that my fissure looked like nothing worse than a small paper cut. SO, I saw another doctor to get a 2nd opinion, as I really don't care what the thing looks like, I just want it to GO AWAY! This doctor, again, reassured me that things look good, "Keep using Rectiv and fiber and you should be healed in 6 weeks". But I feel like my healing has sort of plateaued, as the past 3 months I've had 3 weeks of minor spasms, and 3 weeks spasm-free, off and on. She even told me if I asked her to do the surgery that she wouldn't do it because it looked so superficial.

Anyway, I'm going to get another opinion next month to get some more advice. How long can it go on like this? Has anyone else been in a similar boat? Do i just continue to live like this til it hopefully heals? Should I pursue surgery for something that looks so minor? AND will a doctor even agree to do the surgery since they are already so hesitant to perform it on a young woman? I'm just tired of going through these ups and downs as I'm sure everyone on this board is...

It does sound as if you are healing. 3 weeks of minor spasms and 3 weeks spasm-free sounds pretty good. Why not keep a chart of your progress. Note every day whether you had pain, what level of pain, and your BM consistency. Some people keep a diary on this forum.
That way you can see whether you are in fact making progress. Often, improvement has to be measured in weeks rather than days. Pain gets less over time, set-backs less frequent and less severe.
A set-back can seem much worse than it is, because it's just so darn depressing to be in pain again. Once it's over, it's easier to put it in context of overall improvement.

On the other hand, if you keep this diary for several weeks and see no improvement, you will be armed with information for your doctor.

I hope you can heal on your own. If rectiv gives you headaches and dilt. gives you a rash, try nifedipine? I found nitro (rectiv) to be the most effective, but everyone is different.

Hi, Scientist!

Sorry- I forgot to mention I also tried nifedipine. I really didn't feel that it helped. As for the headaches, I'm just sucking it up and dealing with them. I kind of feel like Rectiv is the strongest so I'm hoping it works the best.

I have thought about keeping a diary a lot actually. But it's tough since it seems like there are so many other things that seem more pressing to get done with having a little one who is now crawling! It just seems like the day flies by and by the end I'm exhausted.

I am hoping I really am healing. I think you're right about the pain making the fissure seem worse than it actually is. I wish I could actually see it to monitor it more closely.

Thank you for your encouragement. You are a blessing on this board!

Totally agree with scientist. Sounds like it is healing, it can take a really long time. Especially if the cut was that deep. Good luck.

Hi Newmommy,
I can certainly understand how difficult it must be to look after yourself while looking after a little one. It may be making it harder for you to heal, to have to be so active.

I hope you can still enjoy your crawling baby! I remember that age - it's so cute, they are into everything and full of curiosity.

Thank you. I hope it is healing! I guess only time will tell.

Yes, having a baby while dealing with a fissure is ridiculous. I know I'm never drinking enough water. It's so frustrating! But my son is doing wonderfully and he is a good distraction. :)