Discouraged

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Discouraged

Postby Revma » 13 Oct 2013, 21:37

Hello All,

New to the forum, been lurking for a week now though. I had a surgery to remove a thrombosed hemorrhoid and a skin tag, and have been left with a painful AF.It has been 11 days on the Diliatizim creme and I have yet to feel any different. I have been off work for two weeks now, bm's are not painful, but the subsequent spasms and stabning knife like sensation has me crying daily. I am so depressed and have had to cancel a holiday trip that meant the world to me. This has taken over my life in a few short weeks. Someone out there tell me - how long for the creme to kick in?! I bleed with every bm even though my stools are soft and I don't strain. I begged my CRS for surgery after dealing with this for only 9 days, but he said I was too young to risk incontinence - please help me understand when does the 'acute' phase end?! I have always had fissures, but they bled and little else - now all this pain, I feel.like a cripple. The spasms and knife jabs everytime I move are destroying me. I've lost weight, and currently trying to not cry myself to.sleepas Ive missed another get together fun filled evening with friends - Ive missed so much it kills me.
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Re: Discouraged

Postby pitaX1000 » 14 Oct 2013, 11:51

Hi Revma. I'm so sorry for what you are currently experiencing. I know how awful and all consuming it is. I was where you are just a week ago. I had to take the week off work and felt that there was no end in sight as each day seemed to be worse than the day prior. I did not have bleeding with my BMs but I did have the knife like pains both during an all day after. The one thing I did differently between last week and this week was have my dr prescribe a lw dose of Ativan. I don't know if it was the Ativan or if the healing was already beginning but I felt the moment I started taking it, the spasms reduced dramatically. I was finally able to relax. The discomfort is not gone entirely. I still get some stinging after a BM and a few hours of kind of a pressure like feeling, but overall I would say 80% improved over last week. We are all different in the way our bodies heal and respond to things and what works for one person may have no effect at all for another. For me it has been a bit of trial and error trying many of the things I've learned here in these forums. My routine is Colace three times a day, Nitroglycerin in the morning after a BM and again before bed. I take my Ativan when I wake up to help me stay relaxed during my BM then hop into the tub. My diet is oatmeal, flaxseed, fruit, veggies, organic Greek yogurt, quinoa and brown rice and applesauce. For now and or a long time to come I don't plan to deviate from this. I have a teaspoon of Metamucil before bed as well as insert a Carlson key e suppository. My morning BM is done with my feet on a stool and my hand pushing my tailbone slightly forward and absolutely no pushing or straining at all. I barely feel it fall out and get a perfectly clean wipe on my Tucks wipe when done. I know this all sounds like TMI but without people sharing in detail what works for them, I would not be virtually pain free today, just one week removed from where you are today. I realize what a slippery slope this is but I finally feel a light at the end of the tunnel. I know you will too.
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Re: Discouraged

Postby Revma » 14 Oct 2013, 15:41

Dear Pitax1000,

Thank you so much for your detailed response, it has really cheered me up today:) I am hoping like you I get to move on to the pressure and slight pain, as the stabbing is unbearable. Will ask my GP about Ativan next visit. Petrified I will need surgery that may render me incontinent - so praying it self heals. I too have maintained a strict diet, but need to cut down on fibre as stools are so bulky they look like they will tear it more. I am worried about stool softeners, as constipation was never my problem, it's explosive diarrhea that caused the fissure to tear (was on senekot following hemm surgery, and it made it all worse, or that is my guess at least). However, I have been taking one dose of docuset ever other day. I squat on the toilet for all my bm's as well, but I still strain a wee bit. Funny thing is, I used to be renowned for emptying my bowels like clockwork everyday...now after the af I am all over the place. Finally nothing u said was too much information - really more like a lifeline. Sorry for the ramble but am mid spasm and a bit messed up!
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Re: Discouraged

Postby fishurfighter » 15 Oct 2013, 05:50

you need to sleep more and get a good muscles relaxant from your doctor. do not get depressed because it will cause the spasm in your colon again. do not get angry and quit meat. use heating pad in the front it will take a year to recover and it will come back at some time if you did not manage this IBS do not fill your stomach leave enough space for water and air.go to rest room as soon as you can do not hold it for long.it will never go away you need to manage it like other disease like diabetes or blood pressure.
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Re: Discouraged

Postby pitaX1000 » 15 Oct 2013, 21:01

Hi Revma. I hope today was a better day for you. It took the ointment about three weeks for me to start feeling like it was doing something. I think if you haven't had any relief at all after six weeks, you should get a second opinion on surgical options. Read through some of the stories here in the surgical forum. While incontinence is a risk, I think it seems to be unusual. Finding a really good and experienced CRS seems to be key. For me the idea of any surgery down there really terrified me but if I had the kind of pain I was having two weeks ago for much longer, I would have considered just about anything. AF pain completely stops you in your tracks. It seems like you are really doing all the right things. I agree that a good muscle relaxant would be the next step.
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Re: Discouraged

Postby Kreaybutt » 16 Oct 2013, 13:02

I have been in the discouraged place too, i thought it would never ever heal. I became depressed and never wanted to do or go anywhere or eat anything! I lost so much weight that i looked sick. I did heal and im starting to get my life back. It is an amazing feeling and you too will heal! Have hope and stay positive, i promise this has a huge impact on your healing. Pray about it and give thanks for every day. I hope for healing and peace for you!
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Re: Discouraged

Postby Revma » 16 Oct 2013, 13:29

Dear Everyone who responded - thank you for your support and helping me feel like I am not a big baby xx I still am bleeding after BM's and have spasms, bit am hopeful through faith and prayer ans diltiazim (spell?) I will heal too. Hate the life on hold feeling but I keep telling myself - AF's are not cancer, so just breath and get through it!
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Re: Discouraged

Postby vdb324 » 16 Oct 2013, 18:12

Great outlook! I always have to remind myself that things aren't as bad as they could be, and I should be thankful for all the moments I'm pain-free; able to walk and run; go to work; etc.!
Feb. 2013 - Developed AF
July 2013 - Diagnosed AF;nifidepine lidocaine treatment
Oct. 2013 - 1st round of Botox & skin tag removal
Dec. 2013 - 2nd Botox
March 2014 - Spinchterotomy
June 2015 - Diagnosed with Pelvic Floor Dysfunction/Vulvodynia
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