You know, I don't really feel all that nervous/stressed about the surgery, at least not at the moment. Incontinence isn't even a thought, I'm actually far more worried that the surgeon won't cut enough muscle. He did admit to me that he's had to do more than one surgery on some of his patients before. I'm not worried about needing to have two surgeries, either, I'd gladly do it if I could have a normal butt again.
I'm just worried about what the effect on our relationship will be if I don't get perfectly healed right away...if I spend months and months feeling about the same as I do right now.
I'm praying for a great outcome and I do trust the surgeon. But I know that if there's disappointment in store for me, my husband won't want to hear about it.
But thanks for reminding me about those 90% odds...I needed to hear that...

Ahhh....I finally got that hug and the "I love you" I wanted...
This was one of our worst fights ever though...
I'm still a little hurt and I think we'll be giving each other some space for awhile, but the worst is over! This situation is bad enough without relationship strain too.
Thanks for all your replies!!!!!!!!!!!!

We had a big one too but things r better, I guess my having a complete meltdown was inevitable anyway. Like u I don't talk about it all the time so I think they forget or assume it's getting better but I explained to him that he should b happy I am able to manage my AF and this household! Things have been better and my pain is a little less so I think we'll get thru it. I'm glad u r doing better as well, I think men need a little reminding now and then...
Right now we have crazy things going on, his mom having a full mastectomy at the end of march and my sister in law is having a baby due in two weeks! I guess it's good my surgery got bumped so I can try to help them but I can't wait I hope it's all over soon!

So sorry you have to deal with this kind of problems! In fact, nobody could understand this sort of pain until they have actually felt it. I'm so ashamed to admit that sometimes I was that desperate and hurting so much when everything was spiralling out of control (my health, my job, my family and my life) that I almost wished them (some of my family members) to get ....you know what in order to teach them empathy. I hope to have never slipped. :oops:
I pray for you to find relief after your surgery and as soon as possible!