Anal Fissure Support Forum

[Biscuit1011]

It feels weird to introduce myself
to talk about my anus since I’ve hidden this problem for many years. But I’m trying to get over the instinct to hide and actually receive some form of support since I’m in such a terrible mental state. I’ve thought about ways to kill myself which scares me but I’m so despondent and depressed. I’m 34 and have been suffering for 11 years. This condition robbed me of the best years of my life and my chance to get married, have children, etc. I have a long story but I’ll put that in a separate post. I’m scheduled to have Botox and anal dilation next Tuesday and I am absolutely terrified. I had fissurectomy 9 years ago and the recovery was brutal and I feel like it only exacerbated my problems (came out of it with another fissure and stenosis). I have a history of doctors creating more problems for me when I go to see them than what I started with. I’m so nervous about what is going to happen next week. I know this isn’t very detailed and I will make a more detailed post about my history but for now I just needed to share this hopefully with those that understand since no one in my life does.

[Fissurefrustration]

Hi Biscuit,

welcome to the forum! I know it sounds weird introducing yourself - but I guess this in some way is like therapy talking it through with others that understand you!

I'm so sorry you are feeling so low, I completely sympathise. I was also in such a bad place for 10 years or so with my butt pain. No sex life, scared to eat, scared to poop, trying every lotion potion and medication on the planet in a desperate attempt to find some relief.

How has your dilatation gone? are you recovering Ok?

you aren't alone - I promise you.

there is hope, I've got 99% recovery now 10 years down the line and I think it's down to dilating regularly, I've had so many surgeries I should get a free entry pass to the hospital

keep your chin up, reach out if you need to chat.

FF