I started on this AF hell back in September with probably the most excruciating pain that I have known. Thankfully those days are behind me. I seemed to improve really fast after the first couple of weeks and was doing GREAT on a very controlled diet and Diltiazem.

Back in early November I went to the CS that said I was doing well and to continue. Well I started relaxing he routines, Ijust like I read here not to do I also stopped the Diltiazem because I got tired of putting stuff in there constantly. Sure enough by the end of November I was starting to spot more often than I had in many many weeks. I had pretty much gone for a good month or more without any spotting. I had a couple of hard BM during that time. I started getting irritation, itching and even some occasinal mucus. Not foul smelling or anything. Back to being sore but no spasms.


Then two weeks ago I got really constipated and had to strenuous BM in two days and I am pretty sure I had a small retear. Ever since I have been spotting on a regular basis unless I really do ZERO straining whatsoever, the itching seems to be improving. THANKFULLY. I still have no real pain - sometimes I am at a 2 in scale of pain maybe after a BM and it doesn't interfere with my life. But I am tired of the spotting, the mucus which always rattles me to see and the general having to worry about my BUM constantly. Really?
I just needed to vent and to hear someone tell me this seems normal AF stuff. Like I said my pain is DEF nowhere bad and it is not really messing my life all that much but is it always going to be this way or is there hope that someday downthere will be back to semi normal without mucus, blood and fear.

Going back to CS on the 27th to talk about the new stuff with him and make sure it is all still a-ok.

Sorry to hear you re- tear your fissure. Yeah, the thing with fissures is that when you get them and heal them "naturally".Meaning without any surgery. Your bum becomes very delicate. Any hard BM, change in your diet, or less fiber or water intake, can make you re-tear your fissure. I have been battling with this for more than a year. 4 months ago I finally cured it. Meaning no pain at all. But this holidays I dared to go out with my friends( just some wine and tapas nothing out of this world) and had a set back. It was not as painful as before, but it was very discouraging. I am better now thanks to the use yet again of nitro and Miralax. What it makes me think that probably I have to be my whole life drinking tons of water, eating super healthy and getting nervous every time I will behave bad with my diet. I have a very stressful job and have to travel a lot, so some times I can not eat super healthy even if I want. So I am considering to have the LIS. I think my fissure is taking over, is ruining my social life and making my work not very pleasant. I just can not go like this any more.
If you want to continuing going without surgery you have to avoid hard BMs like the plague. Hard or running BMs are the worse for a fissure, they will re- tear it any time you have them, for sure. Don forget also to drink water and eat your fiber because constipation and straining are a no, no. By the way When Diltiazem is used for extended periods of time it can cause sensitivity ( itching, rash, irritation) so be careful. Be very diligent with your diet and water intake so your little re-tear don't become a fissure from hell again. Good look with it and happy holidays.