He said I don't need a surgery which was awesome but he told me the only thing I need is self dilation before and after my bm.
Tried it. Its kinda hurting like low key after it?
Also after every soft bm I feel like I'm back to the starting position?
I dunno what to do advice? Any experiences? The sticky self dilation post at the top suggests dilators but I can't get them here

so i tried this and it seems like it made things worse. I didn't feel any pain during the BM or during the dilation but afterwards yeah there was pain and this pain was kinda proonged and im still feeling sore which is new. Please someone tell me im not alone. im feel so really hopeless

Any muscle stretching might cause soreness, but there shouldn't be pain. Be sure you are using plenty of lube and go slowly. Also, if you have an abrasive movement (i.e., with particles in it), they might be scratching you inside. I understand the rationale for relaxing before a BM, but be sure there is nothing in there scratching you.

Get a second opinion. I had been trying massaging and stretching the anus with a lubed glove and told my CRS who said to stop as it only aggravated the fissure. I personally never saw how stretching a tear would make it heal.