by Okaybum » 15 Mar 2019, 17:35
Thanks! I needed to hear that. Antibiotics are doing some wonky things to me right now. I fought through what seemed like constipation, ended up with total diarrhea that made my bum sore in another spot (I don't think that is a fissure)
Then today had a harder bm. No pain at the fissure, no familiar pinch. It wasn't comfortable but there was no blood in the toilet however when I wiped there was some pink. Not a lot. No pain after, no sting, so maybe the pink/orange was something I ate or maybe it's that sore spot (that is improving)
Strangest thing ever but it sent my anxiety and depressed feeling straight back up thinking, well, square 1. I've been so good since September. But this doesn't feel like square 1 as I have no fissure pain and didn't feel it pop open.
I'll count myself fortunate, pick myself back up, and move on.. I wish the public patient waiting list wasn't 6mo+ but I'm still motivated to heal. I've got this even though I wish I could stop worrying about my bum. There are worse things in the world, I keep telling myself that.