Can't believe I just introduced myself and it got lost, just my luck, will try again later :(

Am I the only one that is so fed up with the pain, bleeding, burning, glass passing agony that I am really thinking of giving up ?i AM SO SO SCARED OF HAVING AN OP. really scared that I can't put up with this anymore. So sorry I can't be supportive and helpful, just have nothing left to offer.

Hey Nimitor
I was diagnosed 2 weeks ago but have had this since late October/early November. At times I have been so depressed but I kid you not the support you get from this forum really does help! Here are some great tips I've picked up:-
1. Try not to eat dairy, it makes BM's hard and painful.
2. Eat plenty fruit and veg.
3. Take 2-3 hot baths (this really does help!!)
4. I have just bought some Preparation H wipes from Amazon. After painful, bloody BM's these are a god send! Soothing and cooling......then fling yourself into a hot bath!
5. Invest in a heat pad. I have ordered a microwavable wheat cushion. Sit on it, lie on it, jam it up you backside!!
Ask all the questions you think you can't ask, be as crude as you like, we've all been there and know exactly what you are trying to deal with. Just to put you in the picture, my fissure is chronic, I bleed a lot, I suffer terribly with the toilet, I work full time and I am also studying for a degree. I really really feel your pain. Last night was so bad for me I considered going to A&E! I took a bath, used a heat pad, waited for my tablets to kick in and had a undisturbed and pain free sleep. This morning I went to the loo and had pain so jumped straight into the bath. It worked, the pain is nowhere near as bad as yesterday.
I hope you feel some relief soon!!

Thanks for tips Bobcat, I have tried ice packs but not heat so I'll give it a go.I was first dignosed with a fissure 2 years ago,last Nov.it really flared up but with rectogesic etc.settled unti 20th Dec.Since then I have had terrible bleeding and pain every single day,I haven't been able to go back to work as for some reason this time the pain and burning is acute when I am sitting so my trips out, which have been just to the surgery,I am lying on the back seat.Can't drive because the spasms make me jump.I think I am having a reaction to the rectogesic,the skin between my bum is raw,cracked and bleeding,nurse gave me dermol but said there was not a lot more that could be done and I ought to be referred to the surgeon.I tried not eating at all for 4 days ,just drinking milk and juice..after 4 days I still had to go and had bm from hell.How come I have never heard of fissures before!!!I do get some relief from bathing but I just want my life back and feel so depressed.Have ordered wipes..so fingers crossed.Thanks for replying x

hi nimitor,
i just had surgery today. it you are really in that much agony, then i would say you have nothing to lose. i know i have yet to get off the pain meds from the surgery today so i know i have half the battle won.....but i am very optimistic at this point.
not sure if you are doing good by mixing only drinking milk and juices.
since you are in the UK, you can look up this site:
macrobiotics.co.uk
it may or may not help you turn your situation around. definitely worth a look....
also, not sure if in the UK you have diltiazem 2% and lidocaine 5%. right around finals time, i had a horrible pain last month, early december, that it was really bad. using both of these, and in less than 2 days, turned everything around for me. i didn't even have to continue using the lidocaine ointment...but did continue the diltiazem.
it made a world of difference for me.
it took me seven years about to get surgery finally and i am glad that i did it on my own terms as it all felt like it was the right time this time. and i am a huge scaredy cat of needles and docs and hospitals and what not.
you are 2 years into this....so you may be able to turn stuff around but don't go just trying to live off of milk and juice.
explore macrobiotics if you feel adventurous.

Happyass, Gosh I wish mine was, I am so impressed that you have had surgery and post???? I am at my end,if you know what I mean, I am so scared of surgery, well, the poo after, that I have considered just taking too many painkillers:( I have no life outside of the bathroom and bedroom. Gosh, I am so selfish!!So sorry, wishing you loads of good vibes love and healing xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hey there,
Just wanted to say welcome to the forum. Sorry you are in pain. Don't give up! Don't let the fear of the first BM after surgery keep you from getting it done. Mine was better after the surgery than before. I know it's scary but don't let fear keep you from getting your life back:)
As Happy said , I wouldn't try to live off just milk & juice. There's some really good tips in the diet and supplements threads. Are you taking a stool softener?

Hi nimitor -
I think a lot of people here know how you feel, because this pain in the ass is so bad! So many nerves there, and when you get this condition, you realize how every move your body needs to make is all centered around your butt. I've had an AF for only 3 months - but one month ago it was quite bad, with spasms and pain, and I was told that I would have to wait 3 months to see a CRS for a first appointment. My thought was "I am not sure I can make it 3 months. I don't think I can live with this pain every day." so I know what you mean, and I've heard other people here say similar things...
But somehow you have to get control over this thing, and read the stories of all the people here that have done that, and how they did that, and don't give up... that's my advice anyway.
Can you press your doctor to get a CRS appointment as soon as possible? If my AF were still as painful as it was 1 month ago (like yours sounds just now), then I would still be pushing to see the CRS ASAP (my AF has settled down to tolerable now).
For me, the movicol (stool softener), baths and heating pad, and resting have been the biggest helps. And to look at your condition one week at a time rather than day to day.
Welcome here!

Thanks for tips:)Went docs this morning and am getting a referral a.s.a.p.I take lactulose twice a day which is supposed to soften things up but its not too successful.Have read through diet threads and think I have learnt quite a bit,also my nurse practitioner told me to have lukewarm baths ,they did help but hot baths are so much more soothing.I have also been given lidocaine 5% but I couldn't remember the other one when I went!Checked out the macrobiotic site, am going to take some of their advice...have already changed to soya milk so fingers crossed.Still in pain today but somehow it doesn't seem so bad knowing I am not unique, I honestly thought it must be some terrible disease that was going to finish me off..all this pain and blood for "a fairly deep slit" as my doc called it.THANKS

Hi
I think we all know how you feel, at least now you are getting a referral so might get some answers/ help soon