It feels like I have a lateral one that is like a good half inch or maybe even a 3/4 inch from the o ring, is that crazy odd? No way that's gonna heal on it's own with creams and baths, how could it? I don't know millimeters and centimeters (sorry, US guy, metric makes me feel dumb) but has anyone else had a really long lateral one (by lateral I hope I'm saying it right, it is on the side.

Hey lurker - that sounds like a pretty good-sized fissure, but not unheard of. I remember reading some older posts that described pretty long fissures too. What would concern me a bit is that fissures usually appear in the posterior or anterior position of the anus (at 6 o'clock, which is the end closest to the spine, and at 12 o'clock, which is the end closest to the genitals). Lateral fissures are relatively uncommon, so I'd get assertive with your doctor about having some tests done to rule out any underlying condition, like crohns, for example. I don't want to freak you out, but it's good to know one way or the other because the results of such tests will make a difference to how the fissure is treated so that it will heal.
I hope it turns out well and that you heal up very quickly! :D

My CRS said mine was at least 1 1/2cm's so they can be long! Hence, why he sutured mine up (Anoplasty).

I think mine started around my belly button, at least that s how it felt.

Wouldn't I have other symptoms of chrohns?

Normally, crohns would also involve other digestive symptoms, but there is also "peri-anal" crohns, which, apparently, does not involve the same cluster of digestive tract symptoms. Paulspain had to work very hard to finally get his diagnosis because peri-anal crohns is pretty rare and it's easy to miss because it doesn't have all those other symptoms. His posts are worth looking at. I'm certainly not saying that if you have a lateral fissure, then you have crohns. I'm just suggesting that you might want to ask your doc about excluding that condition before proceeding with conventional treatment. That's really just my opinion, though, so please take this with the appropriate grain of salt. :)

Lucky for me I also have fissures at 6 and 12 o'clock as well so I have that going for me, but the big one seems to be lateral.
Am I the only one who has had a lateral fissure aside from Paulspain?

I don't think so. I have heard of lateral fissures that don't involve crohns, but I've also heard that CRSs pay particular attention to fissures that are not in the 'normal' positions. I think that the fact that you also have fissures at 6 and 12 o'clock might be a good sign, as perverse as that sounds!

My first CRS, who has been around for 20 years, has seen my lovely ass three times now and never blinked at the lateral fissure, neither did his PA. But who knows, he doesn't seem to be doing much to help either. He says they are "superficial" but the big one sure feels long and painful as heck.

It sounds like your CRS has quite a bit of experience, so my guess is that if there was something to be concerned about, he would have found it. From your other posts, it looks like you are a seeking out a second opinion. Quite a few boardies have done that, and it's never hurt to do that, from what I've seen. I'm sure you don't have anything other than the fissures to worry about - that's certainly quite enough! I hope you get some help soon, though. I know what it's like dealing with doctors who don't seem to help much. But often they do come through in the end, or the next CRS does. :D