hey folks,
not been on in a few days , having a VERY HARD time emotionally and I'll post a proper post when I get on my laptop ( using me iPhone and it takes ages to type) . Just wanted to say day 10 post Botox and whTever else he did I amstill not sure if it was a fissurectomy TBH but I managed to get to see him a week this Tuesday when I ended up phoning his secretery in floods of tears, must be v. Nice lady as it was meant to be 6 weeks b4 I sE him. Anyway after a setback last Monday of thinking I was ok and overdoing it. And getting pain I have rested so much I haven't moved off couch practically and now at mums who is looking after jaz while I rest and am in No pain, not when I have s BM or after and no blood and the hemmadoid has gone back in most of way. Had a gentle walk in town thismorning with mum and rested the rest, having twosalt baths a day and 2 movicals ,still on tramadol and diclafenic and 2mg Valium a day and tonight I started getting itchy, is that a good sign, do you think it's worked and I'm starting to heal, after all the setbacks iam so scared to be hopeful but I feel I can be??? You think??
NG any sign of the babas yet, I've not had chance to read other posts but I will tomorrow, very tired after a boring sat night, i meAn Strictly Come Dancing! come on! Lmao.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I really thought it might have worked, I am wrong again. Pain started today and I think it's the spasms back, not as strong but they will get stronger won't they. I've had it, I really have this time.

not an expert huny, but all ive read on here about the same sort of illness,pain, etc you have been having after your surgery sounds normal, me mines started last dec08 1st op feb09, second op june 09, been bed ridden since feb basicaly,
its a long road, i thought the same as you , get op, back on the old feet in no time... ooohhh how wrong i was... am getting there, slowly,, theres days where am fine, and days where am and just feel so much like you name i feel it.
so as hard as it is, dont disppair hunny, you will heal, and laugh and have fun again, take care xx

Hey Darren, in a way im glad you say its normal but you have been almost bed ridden since Feb,
i am scared of so much then, i can work and im scared ill lose my job, i cant go out, i cant have fun, i cant wear the clothes i used to, i was a G-string girl and skinny jeans ahoy but can you imagine what state id be in if i put them on for even 5 minutes :( i think i have another thrombosed hemarroid on the other side and thats the source of todays pain as it feels and looks like the last weeks one but not as bad, are these caused by the botox and how do you get rid of the fu**ers cause they are maing things worse, why didnt the surgeon band them while i was under, i suppose i can ask him all that when i see him a week tues but n the meantime i struggle to rest with my whirlwind 2 year old ~(as i keep moaning about, poor thing)~
I Want to heal so bad, and laugh so much, i actually laughed at something my hubby said on friday and my daughter asked me what was wrong with me! must be that rare its strange to her! And a week today we are going to see Billy Connolly at the CAird HAll so will i get through it? will i be sore, can i have a drink, will i spoil it for my hubby and i cant miss it, i will never get another chance to see THE Big Yin! no way. i will probably set myself back too , what do you think??? I feel like getting completely wasted, FUBAR'd to be honest but that would be so stupid i know!

my reasons for being in bed s long was, my fissure as some do, got to much infection, and through that i got an perianal abccess, with fistula, they drained the abbcess but i had to have it packed everyday as it had to heal from the inside to out,, then in june the fistula was laid open which ment more packing everyday. so it just wasnt a fissure hunny so dont panic.
botox i think can have a 2 weeks or so b4 it kivcks good so ive read, the hemmies i had but my crs took them out ouch ouch, they also found polyps, which were remove all at the same time.
so am give yer self time lass, youll get there, and you be there at the big yin tae, cannae miss him, saw him once myself truely ammazzzzzing
i cant see going to seee him setting you back hunny, it might even help you. lift ur mood. laughter is the best med as they say..
nd aye keep way fae g-strings nd jeans, big granny knickers lol
and skirts or dresses for a while hunnny,. i got wasted once.... but everything was still there the next day but with a hangover....taeee. notttt gooood
its depressing yes very depresing. but you will get there, hang i there, us taysiders/angus folks are hard as f%%%%%%%.
hang in there as hard as it is, keep posting, let it alll out scream shout swear, anything as long as you get it out and off ur chest. take care

Bloody hell Darren, if i had all you had i would definatly not survived it , i would have topped maself! i have a lot o psyhological issues, Anorexia, Depression, low self esteem, and am a very negativeperson too so man you're a hard ane aright! I hate being so negative but i was bullied at school and so its been a learned behaviour and i keep gettin told that ihave to be positive to heal which is pretty hard for me. keep feeling guilty for everyone, my wee one cause im a crap mum the now, my hubby cause im a misery and wont, well can let him near me, plus its makin me insecure that he'll go elsewhere cause between this and the anorexia he has alot to deal with. Then my folks and his folks cause they are doing all they can as a canna lift her, or change her or cope with her for long times an she keeps gettin taken to either granny and they arethe ones shes lookin for now and no me:( AND i rely on them all to help me wi my food too as ive had a relapse and am trying to overcome that too.
Do you work? and if so i take it you'll be on the sick? how much time have u had off if you do work and are your work okay with you? I had alot time off since beingtaken on, i had 3 months with stress and depression , well over a year ago anfd the year afore that i had 6 months wi my anorexia, they know about it afore they took me on so they canna say they wernt warned ! lol but now this and i been off for a few months now i think i mite ge the sack, can they do that? iwork for BT and although its a pretty boring job its bloody good money that i really need. Sorry fir nippin yer heid! haha xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I love the lingo guys !
I am sorry the pain is back Peachy
Are you sore from the injection sites do you think ?

Anorexia, Depression, low self esteem, and am a very negativeperson too so man you're a hard ane aright! I hate being so negative but i was bullied at school and so its been a learned behaviour and i keep gettin told that ihave to be positive to heal which is pretty hard for me. keep feeling guilty for everyone, my wee one cause im a crap mum the now, my hubby cause im a misery and wont, well can let him near me, plus its makin me insecure that he'll go elsewhere cause between this and the anorexia he has alot to deal with. Then my folks and his folks cause they are doing all they can as a canna lift her, or change her or cope with her for long times an she keeps gettin taken to either granny and they arethe ones shes lookin for now and no me:( AND i rely on them all to help me wi my food too as ive had a relapse and am trying to overcome that too.
Do you work? and if so i take it you'll be on the sick? how much time have u had off if you do work and are your work okay with you? I had alot time off since beingtaken on, i had 3 months with stress and depression , well over a year ago anfd the year afore that i had 6 months wi my anorexia, they know about it afore they took me on so they canna say they wernt warned ! lol but now this and i been off for a few months now i think i mite ge the sack, can they do that? iwork for BT and although its a pretty boring job its bloody good money that i really need. Sorry fir nippin yer heid! haha xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
omg u have been through the mill in your life . i think b/cause of it all it starts to stir up up other thoughts and so much more anxiety for you while you have theses butt troubles.
1. you wont and are not a crap mum. when ill theres only so much any1 can do, so stop thinking like this. its cuz ur ill, u cant be a 100% mummy ok,
2. am sure your hubby wont be going anywhere else, for anything, he`ll be just as anxiety underneath about your health if not more, as he knows your full history, and if he feels in need of relaxation, heyyyyy theres other ways apart from going to find another women. where a man /woman can get rid of sexual frustrations. so again please dont worry, am sure he loves you just as much as he did b4 this fissure, hemmies etc happened ok.
3. tyour work cant do nothng, they cant sack you etc, ur ill, so ur job will be safe,,,,, bt do i get a discount from ya lol.
its alll about time hunny, give your body rest,everything it needs, you`ll get there lass, and no yer nae nipping ma heed women, lol just my advice can be pretty rotten, other on here are far more updated than i am, am still learning, and it all comes from this site
i feel doctors etc dont understand the full impact of this %%$$Ј$%Ј$ thing has on ur life .
but folks on here do. so stay here, read stories, ull find hope, cuz as you i was doon,in the dumps ask anyone on here, peeps on here have held me together,
tabby,cheryl val kim, corsi, fissy to name but a few. am sure if we all club around you when you need us, you start seeing lite at the end of the tunel as i did
take care, keep us up dated, one way or another we will all help get you through this. sty strong wifie lol, u`l dae it , if i can u can.

Darren, thanks again. I didnae have a clue there wiz places like this, and its helped loads! More than any o the clueless docs thats fir sure!
Tabby, no really sure where the pains comin fae. maybe is the injection site, i thought maybe another flippin pile like lastweek, ill huv tae wait till a week the morrow to see Mr Moses and hope he has answers.
P.S Tabby, come on admit it, ye ir jist here fir the banter!!!!!! LMAO (hope you watch Still Game?)
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Dazzy
Oh aye Peachy i love the crack, literally !!
Incase that sounds a bit O'ER :roll: Crack/Craic in Scotland means -
Irish word for fun/enjoyment that has been brought into the English language. usu. when mixed with alcohol and/or music.
'Bhi craic agus ceol againn' : We had fun and music.
Fun doesn't really cut it though. General banter, good times had by all.
Also, a person who is good fun/great company.
It was great craic.
She's great craic when she gets going.
He's great craic when he has a few pints on him.
What's the craic?
How's the craic?
The craic was mighty.
Note: Very tricky to get away with saying this in the US without getting strange looks for police officers.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=craic
Literally is talking about my backside
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