Hi, Everyone,

A little background info on me:

I'm 29 years old, female, and a new mother (hence the screenname). I gave birth to a beautiful son on September 28th. I suffered a terrible labor and won't go into much detail, but ended up developing a fissure the beginning of November (blood on stool and tp). The first colorectal doctor I saw pretty much gave me little hope other than giving it time, drinking Citrucel to bulk stools, and diltiazem. I suffered with a lot of pain for awhile, until I came on this forum and read basically everyone was drinking Miralax. Why my doctor did not recommend this, I do not know. So I started taking half a dose am and pm and lo and behold, my bowel movements stopped feeling like knives! But for whatever reason, this fissure retore yesterday. I'm attributing it to possible eating more now since breastfeeding leaves me ridiculously hungry all the time, I actually started to eat regular sized meals! But now the re-tear. So what do I do? I'm so depressed and discouraged. Between trying to recover from insomnia that I've had since Day 1 in the hospital and trying to take care of a 3 month old with no family nearby, I am at my wit's end. The second specialist I saw was much more encouraging and told me she would be happy to do the fissurectomy. I don't know what to do. I'm in a lot of pain but I'm scared of the pain after the surgery, plus I kind of feel like I'm basically sealing the deal that we're having no more kids. The icing on the cake is my husband and I have still not had sex. I'm so afraid to with this fissure, I don't know if it will make things worse.

Does anyone have any advice? Encouragement? Please help!

Hi Newmommy,
What a difficult situation! Being a nursing mother with a fissure must be really hard. It's so hard to look after yourself when you have a helpless demanding baby to look after too.
The question that pops into my mind is, are you drinking enough water? I remember when I was nursing, I had to drink and drink, because nursing was so dehydrating. As you know, preventing dehydration is essential to keep your stools soft, so you have to drink even more than most nursing mothers.
Do keep on with the miralax if it's giving you soft stools. Remember that it draws water into the intestine - that's how it works - so you do have to keep up the water intake.

Re-tears and other setbacks are the most discouraging thing about fissures! But you've already gained some ground by finding what gives you soft stools. Don't worry, you will most likely heal again. It can be a roller coaster, but hopefully you will improve over time. It can take weeks or even months, but as long as you are seeing improvements, you are doing well. I found that once I started to heal, I had some manageable pain and discomfort but nothing like the agonizing pain of the first couple of months. When you get to that stage, you really do get better from day to day, and hopefully heal totally.
If not, and you have to have the operation, from what I've read here, the post-op pain doesn't even compare to the pain of the fissure.

Have you tried a hot water bottle or heating pad? It's a great way to soothe the area and relax the sphincter, and you can sit on it while nursing. Relaxing the sphincter increases the blood supply and helps healing, as well as easing the pain, so give it a go.

Yeah, sex is definitely a problem for a lot of us. For me, I just sort of hated everything that was going on between my legs, and could not feel sexy at all. And of course there is fear of pain. I think I would suggest just trying it, very very gently and seeing how it goes. It may not hurt at all. If it does, you can back way off.

Talk to your CRS about having more children. You could maybe have a Caesarean.

Good luck, Newmommy. I hope that you heal, and can enjoy your new little one! Keep us posted on your progress.