Michael,
It is understandable to feel the way you do when you experience chronic pain. It is also so good you are reaching out. Keep doing that when you need to

Do you have trusted friends or family who can take some of the burden off of the emotional aspect as well as help in trying to find an answer?

If you feel really desperate please call or chat with the crisis center below. They can just help talk you through what you are experiencing.
www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
1- 800-273-TALK (8255)

Also, if it is too embarrassing to talk to a friend, I would check out your college"s counseling center. It's typically free confidential counseling. It's important to have mental support as it is to have physical support

I am really scared to take stool softeners because every time I have a soft lose stool I get a worse burning feeling. Every time I go under the knife with my doctor she notices that my fissure always has scar tissue that heals over it and actually prohibits it from getting better.

And it honestly it burns around the butt, like inside I believe where my fissure is located. My doctor said itching is a a sign of the fissure and that means it has not healed yet. I don't feel like the burning goes to my penis but just gives me the sensation that I have to urinate... It is really hard for me to pinpoint because it honestly it really hard to think when it is happening.

Does anyone know if the pain killers stop the burning and I should take them before a BM???

Ibuprofen may help with the burning. Why don't you try taking it about an hour before your BM?

Another vote for Miralax and heating pad here.
I sat on a not-too-hot-water bottle for hours every day for months, and it really really helped.

The pain with peeing could be referred pain - that's pain that radiates away from the hurt area. I was sure I had a urinary tract infection because my urethra hurt so much. But there was no infection, it was just pain spilling over from my anus.

Pain is a funny thing. It can be experienced in strange places, and you can continue to feel it after the wound has healed. The nerves "learn" pain and have to unlearn it. As msimon says, there are ways to deal with that, with the help of a pain specialist.

That said, do see a dermatologist.

What exactly does miralax do? Will it give me diarhia?? Because I thought that was for cleaning my bowels. I may be wrong though. I will meet with a dermatologist. This morning I woke up at 5 am to take pain killer before my first bowel movement which was Tylenol #3 I do not know if I just had a good bowel movement or it was the pain killers, I had minimal burning though. Everyone keeps mentioning diete. The weird thing is when I had the extreme burning this weekend after a loose BM I was not eating any grains or dairy. I just had brown rice and chicken, which is really bland and easy on the system.

Miralax draws water into the bowel so that your movements will be soft. They may be liquid, but will not be acidic, like diarrhoea.

Hooray for pain killers. I used to take ibuprofen several times a day, and it did take the edge off. Be careful and don't take too much. You can alternate ibuprofen and tylenol so as not to OD on any one pain killer.

Finding the right diet can take some trial and error. I agree you'd expect brown rice and chicken to be bland. You can keep a diary of what you ate, what your stool was like, and your pain level, and after a while you may see patterns. A lot of people here avoid cheese and red meat. For me, sweet potato was great. Also red lentils, well cooked. Oatmeal was my best breakfast food. Search around the forum. You can use "fissure friendly food" as a search term.

Would that irritate my fissure? Sense it is hurt by loose stool.