Hello,
I'm new to these forums (just created an account today :)). While on a stressed/depressed journey for answers to my health problems, I discovered these forums; Specifically, this thread: http://anal-fissure.org/t4261-self-dilation. I knew something was wrong with me, so I searched, revised my search terms a few times, until I discovered the condition called "Anal Stenosis."
First let me paint a picture of my adventure with health problems, past & present:
Senior year High School - Had slight stomach issues (the start of IBS). Also always had external hemorrhoids, as long as I could remember, though they didn't seem to bother me much.
First, second, third semester College - IBS worsened, hemorrhoids worsened. Was bleeding an alarming amount. Worried I would bleed through my clothes (this caused me a lot of anxiety). Also went to the bathroom about 8 times on average a day. My grades were slipping. Took a medical withdraw third semester.
Two Years Later - After the medical withdraw I took two years off to try to resolve my problems via diet. Showed some promise, so I re-enrolled in college again. This was a hasty decision that ended up being a mistake (I wanted so badly to acquire a college degree, I was blinded). I ended up withdrawling again.
About One Year Later - Was mainly depressed with my life (was not in a good place). Continued to sink deeper into the abyss that was my life. It was then that I finally did what I should of did from the start, which was see a Doctor.
Doctors Diagnosis - I had 4th degree external hemorrhoids, internal hemorrhoids, as well as a prolapsed rectum.
Surgeries - This lead to me having 3 surgeries at various times over the course of about 1.5 years. Hemorrhoidectomy was one of them, which was considered less serious than the other two.
Two and a Half Years (present) after surgeries - I have had plenty of time to recover. Everything is fine, or well not everything. Only what the surgeries set out to fix. My IBS seems worse (I have to really be strict with what I eat), and I have become dependent on the use of water enemas just to go to the bathroom (due to anus being too tight, which I found out today can result from having a hemorrhoidectomy). My last visit to my doctor was about a year and a half ago. I explained to him my concern of the tightness, and how it made going to the bathroom very difficult without the use of an enema. He said everything looks fine, and should further improve with more time... He was wrong.
On to the point of this post:
So, instead of seeking a solution with surgery (with my luck, I'd imagine me losing control of my bowels completely), I am thinking of giving this Self Dilation thing a try.
For those of you, that have given it a try...
How do I determine what size to start with? is it kind of just a guessing process? maybe measure a finger and try to gauge size that way?
Where can I buy a dilator set that is intended for medical purposes? I am not homophobic, but the use of one shaped like a penis, or one that is meant for people into anal fetish.... is kinda disturbing to me (disturbing for me to use one made for those purposes).
Cost isn't to big of an issue if it's around 100$ USD, especially if it leads to a surgery free solution.
Can using a Dilator lead to fecal incontinence? Sometimes? Rarely? Never?
Can it lead to the loss of controlling Flatulence? Sometimes? Rarely? Never?
I read in the thread I linked above it can cause bleeding. Is it a little blood, hardly mentioning? Can it potentially be problematic in public?
I'm going to give college another try this fall semester, so the answers to these questions will be the deciding factor on whether or not i try this. Not being able to go to the bathroom without an enema really makes me lose out on a lot of opportunities, and even then, sometimes it fails and requires multiple attempts (painful attempts). Really hope I won't have to have surgery during the break between fall and spring semester, or during the summer.
All this is very embarrassing and uncomfortable for me to talk about like this... Thank god for the Anonymity of the internet. If it wasn't for that, I would probably be facing a decision on when to schedule a surgery.
I eagerly await your responses. And please know that I really do appreciate any response I get, considering this isn't an easy topic to talk about. Thank you.