Hello,
I wish I could
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I just got my fissure cauterized today and am feeling so terrible. My son just started having a fever yesterday and I took him to the doctor before my appointment not knowing what was going to happen to me later that day. He has a cold, but I went to this colorectal surgeon and talked to him about the nitrobid he prescribed which was giving me horrible headaches. He asked if I was still using the nifedipine the other surgeon had prescribed for my fissure before I lost my insurance. I am still using it but not on a regular basis because I am still weaning my son who is 14 months now. I started having these problems having a BM ever since the childbirth/episiotomy and think straining during birth and the episiotomy went wrong and that my anus is too tight which is what caused the fissure. I don't know what to do I am depressed and worried about going back to my stressful classes in one week. My husband works overtime and literally 7 days a week and i'm looking for some advice on creams and dietary supplements, since my son is still nursing i don't know what to do, what activities to avoid like lifting him and what things to do like sitz bath. He is sick and very clingy with a cold and I am stinging from the cauterization this morning, I can relate to peachy and was crying after I read her post, I thought I was the only one dealing with this shit. I would appreciate any advice anyone can give me. I love my son so much and want to be a good mom who has energy and can go and take him places and live a normal life but even on my break from school all I want to do is stay at home to avoid a bad diet and pain after using the bathroom. I'm so close to finishing my degree but feel like by the time I finish it I will die from impaction or get septic or something. I do fine for a few days and then one bad BM cuts into me and I have pain and no energy for the rest of the day and use my lidocaine or the nifedipine and then the cycle continues, a few good days and then a few bad days and so on...the problem is I can't always control what I eat because I am at school all day and even when I prepare something i sometimes dont have time to eat it, because Im running around trying to finish all the work they give us and then go home and have to take care of my kid. Please help me with any advice, i would really appreciate it, thank you
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I am new here also, so I have no medical advice to give you, but to say that though I cannot understand fully what you're going through, I feel for you, and hope that things get better soon!
My only advice is to take good care of yourself, and it sounds like you may want to take advantage of a good therapist and/or psychiatrist....you sound very depressed.
I normally suffer from depression and has found Wellbutrin very helpful for treating it, and depression is also very common with AFs...and of course with childbirth! I was also fortunate enough to find a wonderful psychiatrist who also does talk therapy, and understands AFs.
Hang in there, seek the help you need, and we all wish you well. I'm sure others will chime in here soon with helpful advice.

I think an A/D and seeing a psychiatrist might help you put things in perspective!

Thanks Marvin,
I think your right, I do get depressed, but I always thought it wasn't bad enough to need treatment since I do get out of the house when I need to and I am happy on my good days when I am pain free. I've avoided calling a therapist because I thought that if I could get the AF under control (which I believe is the root cause) I would be more happy. My professor said the same thing and gave me the number for counseling, unfortunately denial is the longest river in America and I grew up in a family that doesn't consider therapy necessary unless your crazy, I know its close-minded but the truth is I never thought it would be beneficial to my situation, and its hard enough getting someone to watch my kid when I'm sick or need to visit the doctor. Thanks Cheryl does A/D stand for altered diet? I'm thinking to switch to a puree soup diet so that the AF can heal, because even with a soft BM this morning i was in so much pain after the cauterization from yesterday. The Doc said it would promote healing but I feel like it tightened it up even more and may have just tore it again. It sucks when your doctors just do things and don't give you any information or heads up on how to deal with the pain or what to expect.

SS,
I too thought my depression wasn't "that bad" as I got up and went to work everyday, etc. But I went to a therapist through my EAP, and he gave me a depression scale and I was off the charts....depression doesn't always manifest in everyone in the same way.
I think Cheryl's reference to A/D is anti-depressant, but not sure. An altered diet is probably still a good idea...

Marvin is right,its hard to assess the level of depression on your own.Even though the fissure is the root of the problem healing it is not the full solution.I'm finding that out myself now even though my fissure has healed.I've noticed things have changed for me mentally and I tend to feel low more often now and my anxiety has jumped now that I have other health issues to deal with and I never had this much anxiety before my fissure.Planning to see a therapist in a couple of weeks and maybe you should do the same.My hope is that I can cope with my problems a lot better if I see a therapist.Are you using stool softeners?That should make bm's less painful.Hope things work out for the better for you good luck.

I meant an anti-depressant when I wrote A/D. I use Lexapro, but will probably stop taking it in a few months. I don't think a person can judge/gauge their own level of depression and/or anxiety. It takes a professional to do that because often the depressed person is not thinking entirely rationally.

Your right on that Cheryl.I on the other hand can gauge myself mentally more even though not accuratley but since mental problems run in my family I don't over look things as far as what goes on in my mind.My brother is a schitzophrenic,had an aunt who had depression and commited suicide 15 years ago,and me and my mother have ocd.I can definatley understand how a big majority of people can stay oblivious on how they perceive things when they are not thinking rationally like my brother.

My younger son has OCD (among other things). Does your brother function OK in society. I think they are realizing that schitzophrenia is a genetic problem (as are most other conditions in my opinion).

Ugh for about 3 years we had a problem with him refusing taking his medication and he was giving my family a whole lot of problems.he kept getting kicked out of his apartment and my mom placed him in a boarding care but he kept getting kicked out of those too and ended up homeless for a brief period.He finally submitted and he's in a boarding care now and is taking his medication.Functioning....he's a bit of an odd ball but he's definatley better As far as mental conditions yes I believe it's genetics.Makes me worry about my nephews and how they are going to grow up.