Hi Missy Moo!

I forgot to answer your above question ! I am Canadian:)

Tatie let us know how the first BM goes. I wish I had the relaxed feeling like something more formed could come out without the tearing pain.

Missy Moo,

I will keep you posted :) Have you ever tried applying heat to your bottom just before a BM? I used to sit on my heating pad in the morning before my BM to relax the muscles and I did find it useful.

Thought I should come back and update anyone who reads this. I would consider myself 90% healed now not from a cream, surgery or anything outside of me. I worked on myself mostly self-love I learnt to appreciate my body and see no parts as unclean or gross. I learnt to be appreciative of my bum I even thanked it for the first time in my life I started to see it as apart of me I connected with it. If this sounds strange to you that's a sign that you also need to do this haha. It could be what works for you. There's a few things that I believe got me to were I am now.

1. I stopped looking for help outside of myself
2. I stopped seeing others as bigger then me, in terms of giving power to everyone else and seeing myself as being in need of other to save me.
3. I loved myself for the first time inside and out
4. I talked kindly to myself and my body
5. I looked into other people who healed themselves.
6. I started to have gratitude for myself my body an things in my life.
7. I looked after myself, by doing things I loved, taking time out, moving my body, and eating for fuel and healing as well as having little happy treats sometimes.

8. Meditation or just sitting with myself in silence being present.

9. I read a book by Louise Hay called you can heal your life and more recently I've been following and reading books by the medical medium.

I hope everyone finds healing from within as this is the key even if you get surgery still work on yourself to create internal harmony. I decided to write this because I've had alot if people reach out to me over the years and I wanted to give back. For 8 years I had a fissure I got botox twice, heaps of creams, fiber, cut things out of my diet, cried, begged, gave up emotionally a few times, I felt punished and thought my body was broken an didn't work properly why me I asked why is my life like this.

Well I've found its alot to do with our mindset, gratitude, self love, how we feel about ourselves and what we say and think about ourselves and our lives that plays the biggest part in how our bodies do and how our lives play out in general.

Please feel free to reach out. I really hope someone hears this and can heal once and for all. Take care of yourselves. Love to all