Hey Oregon,
I'm new to the forum too and I feel your pain. Isn't it frustrating when you feel so great one days then pull a 180 and want to cry out of pain and frustration?? I've only been dealing with this for a month or so and have already opted for the LIS surgery. Until then, I've been taking miralax once a day and benefiber twice a day. Also, one of the only things I've found to help the BMs is to (this is graphic I know) put a glove on, cover it in my cream (nifedipine / lidocaine in my case) and spread it around indie of my anus about 1 minute before I actually go. The BM itself is much less painful (ie less ripping sensation) but I do still have the spasming pain for a few minutes afterward but hopping in the tub seems to help. Also, get a heating pad to sit on! It's helps a lot. So sorry to hear you are going through this. Have you seen a CRS?