Let there be an end

Lis, lis again, abscess, and fistula?

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Re: Let there be an end

Postby rockybalboa76 » 04 Nov 2014, 12:27

It's hard to see it now but things will get better. When I was going through my issues, I was given a good piece of advice. Depression is when you worry about things in the past that have already happened and you can't do anything about. Anxiety is when you worry about things in the future that may never happen. All you can really do is focus on the current moment you're in and that’s where you are right now. If you do anything else, you’re just ruminating on things that can’t hurt you any more or things that are fantasies that may never come.
How do you find happiness in the current moment when you're experiencing such pain? It's not easy but there are ways you can refocus your mind so it's not as bad. For example, whenever you find your mind going to a negative place, it's important to mentally reframe the situation. They say “gratitude” is an important part of happiness. Right now, things are obviously bad but what are things I am grateful for? That’s what you need to focus on in order to get through this. Think of those things when the dark thoughts start popping up and it will, surprisingly, help. Some people have suggested writing down five things you're grateful for, each night, before you go to bed, then re-reading them in the morning. It won’t solve everything but it will steer your mind in a more positive direction.
Another thing to avoid in bad situations is overthinking things. Excessive rumination is hard to avoid but it can lead to depressive thoughts. As best you can, try not to over think the situation. When the bad thoughts come, say “Wait. Don’t over think this.” Just take action and move on. Distract yourself with something else, like positive music or funny movies. Again, it won’t solve everything but it will steer you in a positive direction so you can fight this thing better.
You can do this. It won’t be easy but you can do this – and you will get better. Keep fighting. You got knocked down. Everybody does. Now, it’s time to stand back up – and keep moving forward.
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Re: Let there be an end

Postby Savaici » 04 Nov 2014, 13:50

Hopeful, we know that the pain you are going through is physical and nothing to do with depression. Pain just brings us down, but it is a perfectly normal situation. Who the hell can focus when our arse hurts like hell. All us oldies here have you in our thoughts. It will get better. Big big hug :smilyhug: and another couple of hugs too :smilyhug: :smilyhug:
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Re: Let there be an end

Postby hopefulbutt » 04 Nov 2014, 22:12

Thanks savaici. Would be day 22 since last surgery- but had another today so should I all this day 1 again? I don't know. 3 anal surgeries in 30 days. Anyway I went back to the OR today. I now have packing in a valley the abscess had created and a seton. I have no idea what's going on- as my crs says I have a start of a fistula from my old abscess hole toward my vagina- where the seton is. She said it doesn't go into the anal canal, but the valley does? What does it mean? I see her again in a week. Honestly I was so doped up after surgery I might have been on another planet. The crs showed my husband (yup I'm still with him at the moment) how to change the packing and he almost fainted. I don't see this going well....my bestie came over today and said she would be willing to do it if I needed. I'm gonna try and learn to do it myself with a mirror. Only good news is my crs says my fissure is healed- hallelujah! And the fistula that was trying to form hasn't gone through any muscle. She is concerned about how deep a pocket(valley) that the infection made is so slow in healing. Well- how can it with poop and pus everyday? Off to my bath then bed. Tomorrow I'm sure I will bm and probably cry out for death. Onward I go. :roll:
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Re: Let there be an end

Postby hopefulbutt » 04 Nov 2014, 22:26

Thanks Alyssa and thanks rocky. I just saw your posts too. I am trying to stay positive. Been listening to worship music, watching funny tv and Pinterest. Mostly I slept today. Just took the packing out and saw the seton. Looks huge! Yelled at my husband too- didn't mean to, he just warned me it would hurt and I snapped. How do I keep this all clean? I'm nervous about the packing. It's not deep but I know it's gonna hurt. Any tips?
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Re: Let there be an end

Postby Alyssa » 04 Nov 2014, 22:34

Hp,

I have no experience with this but perhaps you can keep it clean by soaking after having a bm and changing the gauze afterwards you can also use a squirt bottle to clean the area..
2/14 Fissure developed
3/14 Diagnosed w/ fissure given Nifedipine
4/14 Referred to Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy=Pelvic Floor Dysfunction
5/14 Fissure declared "healed"/chronic anal pain persists
9/5/14 Botox to pelvic floor
9/22 biofeedback
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Re: Let there be an end

Postby rockybalboa76 » 06 Nov 2014, 12:16

I agree with Alyssa – but you’ll want to double check with your CRS. Don’t be afraid to call them and ask questions. They’re making good money. Let them earn it. If you have a question, be assertive and call them up. It might take awhile for them to get back to you but, at least, you’ll have an answer and you won’t have to deal with the anxiety of not knowing.
Again, it’s enough dealing with the pain. A huge part of it is a mental battle, too. When I had my issues, I would try to mentally focus on a positive image while I passed stool. I would imagine a tropical beach or a flower or a release of a thousand colorful balloons. It sounds crazy but it helped distract me just a little. Of course, I still felt huge pain but it helped me pull focus so that I wasn’t focusing one hundred percent on the pain in the moment. I didn’t solve the problem but it did help me get through it just a little. (It’s like when you go to the dentist and he pinches the left side of your mouth while he’s injecting the right side. It pulls your focus away from the pain just a little bit).
Let’s be honest. This isn’t easy but you can do this. It’s not easy but it’s reaaaally important to stay in a positive space. Otherwise, if you allow this challenge to mentally drag you down, you’ve got nowhere to go but further down and that’s not going to help you get through your current situation.
You can do this. Don’t over think it. Take action and keep moving forward.
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Re: Let there be an end

Postby Savaici » 06 Nov 2014, 13:40

Hopeful, you might like to look at this link where the talk about packing and how it is mostly not necessary and just increases pain. Of course, your CRS may not agree, but then he/she should suggest a solution (a nurse to do it, etc). Not usual that you should have to do it yourself. And believe me, I know the living in a small town number.

http://lacolon.com/services-and-procedu ... -therapies

Thinking of you. :smilyhug:
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Re: Let there be an end

Postby owmybum » 06 Nov 2014, 15:02

Good luck with it all hopeful. i agree with the others. If there's packing to be changed, a nurse should be doing it.

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Re: Let there be an end

Postby hopefulbutt » 06 Nov 2014, 17:07

Day- who cares. Poop AGONY. Hour later and still in pain and spasming. Yea I'm not sure packing is helping at all- it just comes out when I poo anyway. My fissure has also reopened. If I could actually reach my pills after my bm I'm pretty sure I would have taken them all. Hopefully tomorrow is better.
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Re: Let there be an end

Postby Savaici » 06 Nov 2014, 18:04

:smilyhug: There will be an end to it. Easy for me to say. So sad for you. Do phone your GP at least. Just not right that you are going through so much pain. Are you taking a muscle relaxant or something like that? If not, ask your doctor if he'd give you something. I really wish you soon out of this mess.
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