I'm now at the 6 month post-op stage and still getting discomfort and some pain, I'm still tinkering with food, trying to find a nice balance that will come out the other end easily, I find this a major hurdle in the battle for recovery, I mean what the hell does the perfect fissure friendly turd look like?!? I've had all shapes, sizes and textures but at some point they all bloody hurt!! Too soft causes pain, watery causes pain, sticky slimy and damn right horrid causes pain, ironically, hard stools cause the least pain but in the long run they're gonna do some damage to an already compromised bum, I'd be happier to have my asshole sewn up and poo in a bag, no - seriously I would!!
Emotionally, these damn things drain and zap the life out of you, I used to be happy and laugh a lot but along came this little cut and destroyed who I used to be, I can get emotional at the drop of a hat, never before did I analyze everything I ate, water consumption and what my poo looked like, I've never seen my asshole so many times in my life as I have since this sorry saga started, it's almost like an obsession, I have a thing about checking my ass for any odd looking lumps or bumps, as for food, it must always revolve around vegetables, it's a wonder I don't have OCD yet!
Any newbies reading this shouldn't feel discouraged by my experience, we are all different, LIS works really well for some and they heal quickly, however there will always be a minority that struggle with the healing, unfortunately I seem to be one of them, despite this I'm still hoping for success at the 1 year mark, in other words, I'm accepting that this thing will take at least a year to feel anything like normal and 2 years to try and forget it ever existed!
That's it for now

Steve,
Today I asked Dwight to pray for your butt to be free of pain although that might mean you need to change your "name." :)

Lol cheryl, bring on the day where pain doesn't exist!!
Thanks for asking Dwight to pray for my ass

thats sux steve, but i know how ur feeling 3 months post and i wish i was pain free when bms happen. i am now looking at the 1yr mark to be 100% healed 2.
hope things get better soon for you

hugs 2 u both.
healing is happening and it will all be good in time.
the important thing, which is very hard to do in this time, is to stay positive and believing healing is happening and it will be all over.

Thanks mum and happy,
I have accepted that I'm a very slow healer and that things will definitely get better over time, in the meanwhile I'm retraining my toilet habits, I.E. I don't sit there as long as I used to, and only push with minimal effort, previously I'd always wanted to sit there until I felt satisfied that my rectum was empty when actually there is no need, I guess I've become obsessed with the whole thing, I now wait until I get the signal to go, sounds stupid but that's what my AF has done to me.

Steve,
I don't know WHERE you are finding your sigs and avatars, but I think you would get the prize for the best ones right now if we were giving prizes!! I especially like the toothbrush/TP sig!!

Update...
The last few days or so have been ok, but today I had a minor set back (again) the usual inflamed feeling and burning has returned, I'm taking Ibuprofen religiously as I believe this really does help, my BM's have been a bit awkward which has resulted in this recent flare up, I'm still feeling upbeat and positive that I'll overcome this in time.
I'm recording this incase anyone else suffers in a similar way after LIS and thinks they are alone or that something has gone wrong, you are most likely a slow healer like me and need more time, each of our arses are different, we all heal at different rates and all have one thing in common, we know what real pain is!

I think this will be helpful to others Steve. I hope things get back on track for you and you continue to see some progress. :)

Thanks dawn, it's just a matter of time before my Mood is the same as yours! :)