First off let me say I pray for everyone with this awful condition daily. My fissure started a day or 2 after our home flooded with 5 feet of water in August of 2016. My anxiety was through the roof and my mom had just had fistula surgery and was recovering. They also had to evacuate their home to a shelter due to the flood waters. They ended up not flooding thank goodness. Anyway I couldn't imagine my mom sleeping on the floor of a shelter 2 days out of fistula surgery. Once I knew I could get to the shelter I made a quick trip to the restroom and pushed to hard and ended up with a fissure. I didn't bleed but something just felt wrong. I dismissed it and went to search for my parents. In the next days I kept feeling something just odd down there maybe a slight burning/tightness but no major pain or bleeding but it was scaring me to death on top of the flood anxiety. Anyway about 8 weeks later I go to my GP and he does an exam but doesn't feel anything and said maybe I just have a hemroid. That makes me feel alittle better but still didn't explain the new feeling I'm having down there. I have been taking fiber for years before this to help keep things moving so I was good there. Anyway the pain never went away and would come and go and was kinda vague but no bleeding ever. So in January of 2017 I go see my gastro and explain what's going on and he does a colonoscopy where he finds the fissure. He said it looked like it was trying to heal and prescribed nitro oitment which ended up being $450 so he called in some nifedipine and I started on that. Didn't do much. So over the next few months I met my deductible and tried the nitro oitment. Helped marginally. In all this time I ever saw blood twice 2 days in a row. So finally in like October of 2017 I saw a colorectal surgeon who said he thought I was healed yet I was still in pain and can't hardly sit... Sitting makes it worse. Bm get it burning then sitting will put it to the next level so I have had a standing desk at work a few months now. His orders were to keep at the nitro a month and come back if things still hurt. Well of course I went back and he saw the fissure that exam after I kinda guided him to it. He even said he made it bleed alittle although I never saw any blood. Orders that time were a month of nifedipine and come back if it still hurt and we'd talk about surgery. Well I'm there and am seeing another doc in his practice the 6th because she does Botox and he doesn't plus I want a second opinion. I started an antidepressant a few months ago and that has helped tremendously. Before I was physically ill with the anxiety/depression and pain this thing has caused and the medicine had helped significantly. I can't recommend it enough to help anyone struggling thru this. It will help the mental aspect of this hellish problem.
So I'm at a crossroads were I can get it healed enough that it is tolerable and I can somewhat enjoy life but one little wrong move, extra bowel movement that day or upset stomach I'm back in pretty major pain. I feel like the muscle isn't tight maybe not perfect but it's the burning!! My fissure is kinda right on the edge of internal/external and kinda feels like it runs out from the anus a half inch or so. So after 1.5 years I'm not gonna heal IMO unless someone reads this and can give me more things to try! Anyway we'll see what new doc says Wednesday. I have a new found faith and I have to turn this over to God. I'm so done with this issue and want my life back so I can be a great dad to my 5 year old and a great husband again. On the day's I don't hurt much I'm on cloud 9. This past week has been really rough and I have cried and cried. I'm just ready to have my life back. So crazy something so simple can cause this much pain/anxiety/depression.
Sorry it has taken me 1.5 years to post...I have been reading and this site has helped me thru some tough times. I look forward to being an active member and pray we all heal up. Any advice, prayers, comments, questions are welcome!