I'm becoming seriously discouraged & depressed over this. Don't know how much more I can take. I have been having stinging on the right side of my bum for the last month and a half with BMs. Almost every time. I saw my CRS a few weeks ago and was told it was "skin tags" but he didn't do a scope on me, probably because the one in July was normal. But this latest thing is driving me nuts, both because my butt hurts when I poo, & because I am having occasional spotting when I wipe. It's not much blood, and not in toilet, but it's on tissue paper and a tiny bit on stool.

I went to see my primary doc two weeks ago, he claimed I had a fissure. Gave me Nifedipine & Lidocaine. I've been applying it externally & taking sitz baths & watching my diet. What else can I do? But today I am still having a small bit of spotting. It's so depressing. I can't live like this anymore. I was tested today for stds so when I see my doc again this week for follow up maybe that will rule out something. But last night I began feeling unwell, feverish, fatigued. I had a bad night last night, felt very feverish, unwell, ill.

I called the on-call doc, he said from what I described it sounded like a hemmrhoid to him. So which is it? I will demand clear answers from my doc this week because how can I face this if I don't know what it is? Just when i think I'm doing better, I see spotting again. Where is the blood coming from? This is ruining my mental state & making me seriously depressed & I am already bipolar. This is like the most humiliating medical problem one can have.

I'm scared I might have cancer or something. I've used the Nifed/Lido for two weeks now & it hasn't seemed to help otherwise the pain & bleeding would be gone, right? So maybe I need another ointment. Maybe something steroidal.

This is totally ruining my life. I'd just like to not be in pain anymore when I poo & not have to have blood spotting anymore. I don't know what else I can do. I hope the doctors will do something to help me. My mental state can't take much more I feel I'm on the verge of a total breakdown. I'm not sure if she is equipped to do it, maybe my doc can scope me and tell me once & for all what the hell is going on and how to treat it. In the past I seemed to do well with steroidal creams. I need something to cause whatever it is to heal, not just mask the problem. If I go back and see the same CRS, not sure what he'll do, but I have to get this fixed I'm sick of living this way. On top of everything else, my insurance company dropped me so now I have to sign up for Medicaid which is the only thing I can afford since I had to quit my job due to emotional problems. I was diagnosed bipolar this summer right before this started and was coming to terms with it when this happened. And being a gay male wanting intimacy, due to my butt issues I can't even have a normal relationship. It just sucks. Feeling hopeless. In a way I kind of hope the labs do show an STD because maybe that would be easier to treat.

Hi there, I feel your pain but don't give up hope. One of the worst things suffering from this is you can't tell anyone You have to pretend like everything is Ok when it isn't. My current bout of this has lasted over two months now and the drs still can't work out what's wrong with me - very frustrating! When I feel at my lowest I try and visualise the source of the pain and come to the conclusion that at worst it's just like a paper cut. That usually gives me some perspective - ie I might feel wretched but in reality it's nothing more serious than that and I must surely get better in time. Is it worth seeing is you can get something for your anxiety? I know I certainly feel worse when I spiral and dwell on it too much, and that certainly makes me more tense which doesn't help things down there.

Alex p, sorry to hear that you are having a rough time. Have you tried to use Miralax or Ducolax? They will make your poop soft so you will not have pain and the fissure will not reopen and have time to heal. Drink tons of water too. The key for the healing of a fissure is to mantain your BMs soft. I managed to cure my fissure like that. So it is hope. Also for what the doctor told me hemorrhoids don't produce than kind of pain when you have a BM. So I think you my have a fissure. Good luck and I hope you get better.

Thanks, I am trying to do all the right things. I take 1-2 stool softeners every day, get plenty of fiber, drink a ton of water, etc. I have some Miralax Powder but have been a little reluctant to take it even in small amounts because I don't want to get dependent on it. Lately my stools have been softer, and more passable, but it seems no matter how soft they are, it's still quite painful, it's that sharp, stabbing pain I've had on the right side for almost 2 months now. I'm sick of it.

I take anti-depressants & medication for my bipolar disorder and HIV, but some anti depressants constipate worse. I am a little afraid that if I started Miralax I would lose weight, something I can't afford to do. I don't skip meals, I eat, just better types of food.

But two weeks ago, my doctor gave me the Nifedipine/Lidocaine to use. He claimed it was 95% effective. So why, nearly two weeks later, am I still in pain when I have BM? It's to the point when I dread going to the bathroom and I am stressed out and very emotionally drained over this. Nobody should have to be in pain when they pass stools. I'm sick of it. If this doesn't stop soon, I'm going to be suicidal.

Maybe it will just take more time? I'm seeing my doctor again this week, I'm going to demand some answers, & maybe a different type of cream, maybe nitro or a steroid. I have to go back to work, I'm tired of living like an invalid. And I can't tell anyone about this because it's too embarrassing. Being gay anyway, they will just assume that I got a fissure from anal sex, which is totally wrong & stupid. Anyone can get a fissure. This is ruining my life. I see no hope.

No, no, Alex p Miralax will not cause you to be dependent. What it does is pull enough water into your stole to make it softer. It does not have side effects and you can leave it whenever you want. I took it and now I am not taking it any more and every thing is fine. Probably your BMs hurt still because your poop is not soft enough. If I were you I will give it a try. But probably because you have so many conditions, you should ask your doctor if you can take it. Just to be safe. Now my heart is with you. I know how scared and hopeless you feel right now. It is a horrible condition. But there is hope. I cured mine. It is a very slow process do. I have been battling with mine for over a year. And you are absolutely right it has nothing to do with being gay. Anybody can have it, and here in this forum you have the proof. Hang in there. And whenever you feel down, Feel free to contact me or come to the forum and write how you feel. It will help you a lot.

Thanks Betty for the info. How much Miralax should I take? Just a spoonful in orange juice per day? About how much? I don't want to lose weight because of this. I have a bottle of the Miralax white powder. The stool softeners seem to help, 2 per day seems to be enough. Today my stools were quite soft, about toothpaste consistency, but yet it still burned & stung really bad when passing. I don't want liquid stools because I know that will dehydrate me. I had a liquid-like runny stool today also and it also really stung. So it seems no matter how soft they get, they still burn really bad in there.

I'm trying to hang in there. Luckily I'm not in pain all the time, only during bowel movements, and that is somewhat brief, so I guess it could be worse.

Thanks for your very kind words, I appreciate them. Going to try the creams until I see my doc again this week, hopefully he can give me something different that will help this heal. Maybe it will just take longer. But I haven't seen any improvement much in the two weeks since I've been on Nifed/Lidocaine.

I just want to get this resolved. It's been a very hard bad year for me. I lost someone I loved, I was diagnosed Bipolar I, and now this. I need some good luck for a change!

Alex p, if you are having already a BM with the consistence of tooth paste, then you don't need to take Miralax. That's the right consistence. Now if you are having liquid BMs that's not good for the fissure. Hard BMs and liquid BMs are equally bad. Try to have only one BM movements a day so you don't irritate you fissure, maybe you are taking to much stool softeners? Why are your taking two? It is one not enough?. Maybe the burning and stinging sensation is because you are sore down there due to the liquid BMs?. If you are not in pain this is good, it could mean that your fissure is not so bad. This is some advise my doctor gave me:

1. Wash your butt only with plane warm water not soap.
2. Before a BM luv yourself with a dab of Vaseline, to make it easy to pass and to clean later.
3. Don't clean your butt with toilet paper, use warm water or wipes, preferable for sensitive skin.
3. Between BMs protect your butt with Vaseline or an ointment for babies to ease irritation.
4. Try to limit your BMs to one a day.
5. Avoid at all cost diarrhea or running stools.
6. Keep your BMs soft.
7. Do sitz baths with warm water one or twice a day for at least 20 minutes.

I am sorry for your loss. It is very difficult when somebody you love is gone. It seems to me that you are having a very bad time. With your illness, your new diagnosis, your mourning and now the fissure. Looks like a lot for handing it all by yourself. Could you go to a support group where you live? That maybe will help you to cope better with your feelings. Mean while try to take one day at a time Alex p. I hope that your day will be better today.