by Ginger » 20 Mar 2015, 08:56
I read the title of this post this morning and almost burst into tears. I have been suffering from AF's off and on for almost 2 years. The first year was hell...doctors failed to diagnose properly in time and by the time I was diagnosed I was in sheer agony with every BM, like glass, and tons of blood. I dreaded every morning...for a year... work and personal life suffered. Everything becomes about trying to manage this AF. Finally found a surgeon after 6 months and properly diagnosed. Was given diazipam (sp?) ointment still didn't help. He suggested surgery but I was reluctant as I had heard mixed information and results. Then, I found this forum and I had hope. I spent countless hours reading posts, learning, applying different techniques, and after another 6 months (so a year in at this point) had found through trial and error with changes in diet (I also suffer from IBS); dramatically increased water intake, and stool softeners I seemed to be on a path of managing it. Only on occasion did I get the "glass" feeling and occasional days of blood, which I learned may also be caused by anusitis. So...I allowed myself hope. Seemed like flare ups were less and less, and that as long as I kept to my routine, it seemed to work. Now...of course, every day, there was still the worry...the what if? But ok. Then a month ago, I'd been staying with family friends who found out their child had pinworms...and the medication I needed to take could cause diarrea. So my butt was really irritated, but thought it was feeling better. No feeling of the fissure recurring just overall discomfort. Until today..... the pain, the feeling of glass and excruciating pain, blood. My heart sank. Does this ever end. It just feels like I don't want to go on sometimes. The only thing I can see that is a common factor to the flare ups is when I menstruate (sorry men.... but just a fact of life). I just needed to share.... this is the only place where people can really understand.