I was just being silly, since one of the jingles had "I wish" as part of the lyric. I'll move on!!!
I wish Brits and Colonists shared all their cultural slang and never had to explain things like "Poof'" "Fag," and "Oscar Meyer" to each other!!

oh, but it wouldn't be so funny then! Ok, granted, but everyone is now exactly the same and we all die of boredom!
I wish I wasn't scared of everything

Plunk! You have nothing to fear but fear itself....and the courage of a lion. But now everyone is scared of you!!
I wish for immortality.

sha zam!! you live forever, and ever, and ever, and you get bored after 100 years.
I wish I always had good dreams.

granted, but now your dreams are SO good, that you become bored with real life and just want to sleep all the time!
I wish it wasn't so cold today!

(Frap!) :genie: It is warm there! But there are tornadoes...
I wish I always got good service in stores and restaurants!

You get the best service in restaurants now especially by the washroom attendant because that is where you spend most of your time since you have "dumping syndrome."
I wish I had ordered more S'more protein bars.

you get some protein bars - thousands of them, so you cant even get through the front door!
I wish I could fathom out ebaying!

You now understand all the intracacies of Ebay and are a true expert. But Ebay just went out of business!
I wish I had a garden that could tend itself...

your garden tends itself but it only wants to grow weeds - lots of them which are extra fast growing and can never be cut down.
I wish my wardrobe changed its contents every time i was bored with them!