Ok, so I made it to the CRS, finally! I thought I would write what happened here, in connection to the symptoms that I've had along the way....
I was supposed to do two enemas before the sigmoidoscopy this morning, but I just couldn't manage. When I got to the doctors this morning, I told them I didn't do the enemas, but since I had had a BM last night and this morning, they said it was ok. They gave me a little morphine before the procedure - my first time ever getting that! It must have been just a little though, as I was only a little dizzy, and the procedure was still a bit painful, although it only took about 10 minutes total. Guess what image came to me while I was trying to endure this?? Cherylk's avatar of the beach!! So, thanks cheryl for taking me to the beach at that time!
Anyway, the doctor said that it was a small fissure in the usual position that was causing the problem (the hemmies are gone). There is a skin tag present too. The sphincter was tight, but not super-tight. He prefers a conservative approach, and wants me to go back on rectogesic (I had stopped after using it for 6 weeks, in January) and prescribed 5% lidocaine too. He pretty much ended the conversation there. I asked "if I'm not improved in, say, two months, then what?". He kind of shrugged his shoulders, as if there were no alternatives than just living with it! Then I asked about botox, and he said, yeah, that's a possibility. He then mentioned "cutting the sphincter" which he thought was best to avoid since "it can cause injury to the muscle".
So, all in all, I'm glad to have gotten the information and glad to know what is going on. Also to get my foot in the door of the health care system. Knowing what I know from this website, I wasn't terribly impressed with the CRS (who drew a picture of my fissure on a nearby napkin) - however, I didn't discuss too much with him since I'm willing to take the conservative approach because I have been doing better, and give it a whirl to try to heal this. At least that's what I'm thinking now.
Thanks everybody for all I've learned here - it was sooo useful today -- and for all your support!
