Glad you made it through the day Bambi! Just remember something you've said before--the same patterns you had before surgery don't necessarily apply after the surgery. So even if you have some minor irritation, it will probably get better fast instead of getting worse and worse and opening a new fissure.
I think the area is just so delicate! It doesn't like to be messed with. I'm still having my incision pain today, but it's not bad and I'll take it over actual fissure pain. When I got out of the car to walk into a store today though, for the first few steps it felt like being stabbed in the butt with a knife! But it was just sort of a weird zinger and didn't happen again. I do wonder when I'll feel completely healed, unafraid to wipe with tp, etc.??
Well, take care of yourself Bambi. Soak whenever you can and relax as much as you can!

Thank you Alpine! Are you at about 4 1/2 weeks now?
I just got out of the tub- sitting in there drinking water!
Bambi

sorry Bambi about ur set back how r u feeling now???? getting back on track i hope

The only problem with drinking too much water in the tub, is the constantly having to pee. It becomes pretty tempting to just pee in the tub...
Tomorrow will be 4 weeks exactly for me. My BM's have been pretty big and firm, and I feel my incision stretching quite a bit during. But it isn't what I would call painful anymore, it's just a feeling. Maybe a normal person would call it pain, but after what I've been through, it barely registers! But then I'm still paranoid that there's going to be blood afterwards, but so far there still hasn't been any. It was SO ridiculously easy for me to tear something and get myself bleeding before the surgery...the kind of BM's I've been having recently would've left my butt tattered and torn.
How are you and your husband doing?

Oh Bambi – that did sound like a rough butt day. I’m so sorry! I am glad to hear that the fissure site was mostly just ‘irritated’. I think that’s good news. I know I’ve read older boardies here talk about strange sensations and even a bit of pain at the incision site, and even just generally, for up to a year, so it sounds like you are still very much on track. I know what you mean about having to wake up very early to prepare for a busy day. I never know how many BMs I will have, or even how they will turn out. Yesterday I had a harder one than usual first, then a perfect one (yeah!), then a loose one, then a watery one … How are you supposed to handle that??? Do I eat to firm things up or to soften them up? (Arg!) I completely sympathize – such adventures are not fun, and would be even less fun away from home ... and it’s never fun to have a gassy tummy when so much running around has to be done. You really are trooper! I hope the ginger tea and the nice soak worked and that your evening was more comfortable. How are you doing now? How’s your hubby?
hugs,
Hope

You all are so kind to check on us. The truth is I'm having a rather difficult day today. A lot of it is in my own head and I am just very tired. The good news is that my poor hubby is doing much better today. He woke up in the night and I wondered if he would be miserable given that his pain meds had run out (something those of us post-surgery can relate to!), but he really was better. And he took some Vicodin this morning but didn't use the other med for bladder spasms today at all ( the belladonna and opium suppositories!). He was dizzy this morning so I was watching him carefully- pretty understandable given everything that he took or was given to him yesterday.
Hopetoheal- I am having another one of those days you are referring to again today. I started yesterday with a slightly firm BM before we left and decided to take 1/4 teaspoon of Miralax last night for insurance since I was getting a little freaked out by slightly bigger and firm at the outset BMs. I know that sounds like such a ridiculously small amount and I have been so glad to get rid of Miralax from my body as in the two weeks since stopping it I have had many days of loose, watery poops with a lot of gas and that was beginning to get a little better. But then the several days of firm poops and the scare I had. It is so unbelievably confusing and it frankly makes me want to just start eating whatever like I used to.
Alpine, reading your post makes me think that maybe I'm just to some degree overreacting to the slight flareup of pain I had with the firmer poops last week. The incision pain is much better- I could barely feel it this morning with my initial BM which was larger than I recall in a while and a little firm at the outset. But all was ok. Then I had two loose, urgent poops after that before noon had even occurred. That is just very annoying- and the one felt like acid poop and was very irritating. I can't believe that all of a sudden my body seems to react like crazy to even such a tiny amount of Miralax.
I think I'm just going to try to chill out this afternoon and try not to worry. Maybe lie down and take a nap while my husband is sleeping. It sounds like you are accepting these firmer, bigger BMs, Alpine, as part of your body readjusting to the new improved you. One thing this has shown me is that the world did not come crashing down (as in blood, razor blade pain, etc...) even though I let things get a little firmer. I don't want to set myself back to square one, but this going all the time and being miserable in my gut is extremely tiring. And I need to be strong for my honey!
He was so sweet yesterday and grateful to me for my help. I was just telling him- "are you kidding? After all the support you've given me in the last year?".
My prayers have been answered in that his pain does seem to be decreasing pretty quickly. He is talking about going ahead with our planned trip to Las Vegas next week to meet my sister (a 12 hour car trip for us). His Dr. seemed to think he'd be ok- I find myself getting all worked up worrying about my own self, but I need to remember that I am carrying around a virtual backpack of supplies with me for all sorts of poop scenarios and if he is crazy enough to want to do it, I should shut up and go! I also need to remember that back in early February when I had a flareup that led to my surgery being scheduled, we took off and flew to California and drove back in his new car. And that was a very fun trip.
Sorry to ramble on and on. When I came in to check the board, I just felt like crying my eyes out. You guys are such a source of comfort on every level. And while I was writing this a friend called and is dropping off a homemade chicken pot pie for dinner. Very sweet of her.
So I better go at least brush my hair and teeth!
Bambi

Hey Bambi! I’m so happy to hear that your hubby is doing better. That really is such a relief. It sounds like you guys take very good care of each other. I’m sorry to hear that you are struggling with the BMs. I know how frustrating that is. I’m really afraid of having a large, formed poop; but then I also find that the looser and/or watery ones burn a lot. I find that it’s a decision between two different kinds of pain – tearing pain or burning pain. I am looking forward to the day when I can enjoy a good solid poop again!
I think you are safe to have the larger poops. My understanding from what I’ve read on this forum is that the poops get bigger after the surgery (which freaks a lot of people out); but post-LIS folks can handle it because things are looser and stretchier down there. The watery ones may just irritate the tissue. I know that many people describe having to force themselves to relax and let the larger ones come. But ... everybody heals differently and you are the best judge of what kind of poops are best for you right now. But I definitely know how annoying those loose/watery BMs are – what I find annoying is that for me, when I have a third or fourth BM, they aren’t even real BMs. Often, it’s just a little bit and I get annoyed that I went through pain and anxiety for so little!
When people tell me that their difficulties are ‘in their heads’, I always insist that what is in your head is never trivial and is just as important as what happens to your body. This whole experience has really taught me how much psychology is involved in good digestion and proper pooping. Of course, once we recognize that something is largely psychological, it helps us manage the problem a bit better – perhaps by using relaxation techniques. But psychology is a powerful thing, and even if your difficulties are ‘in your head’, that matters a lot and deserves hugs and sympathy too.
You have gone through and are going through so much that it would be impossible for all of this to not have an impact on your psychological condition. I'm just amazed by how well you are actually doing.

I am so, so pleased that your DH is not in too much pain. A trip to Vegas sounds great. I’ve been there a few times and helped subsidize the US economy! It’s really wonderful that you are both even contemplating such a trip. I was very happy to see your post, since I was wondering how you and your DH were doing – ramble as much as you like! We are here to “listen”.
Enjoy the chicken pot pie! (ummm ... that sounds so good!)