Yeah the stress can really play with your emotions.

How are you making out? Are you alone or do you have someone to help you out?

Are you getting out walking / exercising or getting mostly rest?

I'm mostly resting. I walk a little throughout the day, but my daily life requires me to be sitting behind a computer for a large amount of hours. But like I said every little twitch or tingle sends me flying back into bed. My dad and my family are here. I just want my normal life back. Want to live without constantly thinking about my butt or bms.

I hear you. awe all want our normal life back. Yes.

I have my mother here trying to help me out.

I can't drive so it's hard to get out if we need something.

Update:

The doctor said to stop stressing myself out so much and to keep up with my sitz baths.

How you doing?

Hey there! So, it's been about two and a half weeks since my surgery and I feel pretty great. I'm super paranoid, but my surgeon has been very friendly and accomodating. He performed an exam today and said that he felt no swelling and that the original tear looks fine. So, fingers crossed!

Oh that's so good keep up the good work do you know if he did opened or closed lis?

Yeah, I believe he did a closed lis. There were no stitches or anything.

Did he mention anything about which was better or did he say lis is the only answer really for fissures I've had Botox for my fissure but it hasn't healed it 100%

He did say that botox was an option, but I personally did not bother with it. The pain was so great at that point that I insisted he do the surgery.