Fear of Eating

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Fear of Eating

Postby kristiblue » 10 Aug 2011, 09:48

Mindset is "nothing,nothing out" Im very regular at 8:30 am for my daily BM. It;s almost noon still havent gone.Had my diagnosis just yesterday and wow did that scope ever kill! I cried for half an hour. Got the nitro cream or goo as I call it,very tacky and sticky stuff...is it supposed to be like melted mozzarella or chewing gum? Not easy to aplly AT ALL. Getting the associated headache. Im starving so i just had a slice of low sodium turkey breast and jello w cool whip. Yum! Soft stuff. Im afraid to GO. I dont ever wanna GO again. Insane feeling.
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Re: Fear of Eating

Postby Deleted User 579 » 10 Aug 2011, 12:35

Hey Kristiblue - I'm so sorry you're suffering! Many of us lose a lot of weight with a fissure. It really is hard to eat when you're afraid of the result! But do try to eat well. There are lots of good meal ideas on this forum for fissure friendly food. And you might want to consider taking a good stool softener, if you haven't already. Many of us here use Miralax/Restoralax/Movicol because it quite reliably helps make very nice, soft BMs. I know the insane feeling very well! I'm sorry I can't help out with the nitro questions as I had used Diltiazem before my LIS. From what I've read, the headaches subside when you get accustomed to the nitro, and it's a good idea to rest a bit after you apply it. Hang in there! Either the nitro will work or you can talk to your doc about the surgery. That's a scary option, I know, but it has given many of us our lives back. There is hope! Image
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Re: Fear of Eating

Postby Ink184 » 10 Aug 2011, 17:37

Don't! Don't let AF control your life! I have only been suffering for a few weeks but thanks to the great people on this forum, i learned how to control it! I can never thank you guys enough i love you all!
Keep in mind eating less doesn't necessarily mean you will feel better, if anything stool will linger longer in your body and may get harder. Eat moderately, instead of three huge meals take five small ones. Try to include vegetables in each and every meal you take.
Lettuce, Steamed broccoli and artichoke are great too. Okra is amazing if you know some good recipes. I have it twice a week and it (sorry graphic description) produces some really smooth easy to pass stools.
Do not obsess about going to the bathroom, i learned the hard way. I was obsessing about having daily BMs, which further made my AF worse. When you have to go your body will let you know. Do your part and pack on fibers and stool softeners if you want, consult your doctor for one that suits you. Movicol/Miralax seem to be great, Lactulose is good but it didn't work for me.
This is all trial n error, find a system that suits you, and follow it, make a food diary, what makes you pass soft stools and what makes them hard you will figure it out. I did all this in one week thanks to this great forum.
Lastly, avoid spicy foods, avoid anything you think would constipate you. And jump into a hot tub after every BM.
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Re: Fear of Eating

Postby kristiblue » 11 Aug 2011, 15:36

Thank you. Yes the shower is a neccessity after BM vs wiping.I finally had a BM mid morning that was relatively easy to pass but gosh a ton of blood with it. ugh. Image
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Re: Fear of Eating

Postby Deleted User 579 » 11 Aug 2011, 16:17

Oh I really hated all the blood when I had my fissure! Image That's never what you want to see in the toilet! I know it's very anxiety-inducing when that happens, but it really looks worse than it is. The blood gets less and less as you heal, but I know how seeing blood like that can really ruin your day. Hang in there! Things will get better. Image
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Re: Fear of Eating

Postby kristiblue » 12 Aug 2011, 08:19

Yes it definately put a damper on my day. I have been feeling pretty down actually. :(
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Re: Fear of Eating

Postby Deleted User 579 » 12 Aug 2011, 09:29

Aw, Kirsti, I know how you feel. Image The blood really sucks, but try not to let it get you down too much. It will get better, one way or the other. I still have a bit of blood on the TP and my fistulotomy was on June 27th! I'm just so happy it doesn't look like a massacre happened in my bathroom anymore! The blood will diminish and disappear altogether as you heal. Even though I still bleed a bit, I'm feeling so much better! I have started to get back to my normal life again. You will too!
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Re: Fear of Eating

Postby kristiblue » 12 Aug 2011, 12:02

Thank you. I feel rather optimistic. But this is so painful and to me a bit dibilitating. I been staying home all week. Not just cuz of AF I also had some skin procedures(mole removal) I live in Fl,we have a boat and a pool and I'm hold up inside my cave cuz the sun n fun aint happenin for me right now.I cant even imagine hitting the waves w this butt of mine. And the sunshine? Forget it,I look like Ive been burned multiple times w cigarettes..From the lacerations. Im shiny w neosporin all over.I got goopie glycerin in me bung and dammit,
I'm over it! Guess I'll hurry up n wait.
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Re: Fear of Eating

Postby Ink184 » 12 Aug 2011, 17:40

Sorry to hear you're suffering this much kristi, how long have you had your AF? Is it considered chronic yet? My CRS told me one important thing when i went to discuss it with him and book a surgery, after i told him how horrible my life is right now, he said once you feel it is drastically affecting your life, it is the time for surgery.
It hasn't been easy for me either, my entire life has been summarized to a 9:30 - 3:30 period. That's the time i go to work, i have worked around a system to ensure that i am pain free in the mornings so i can go to work during that time.
After 3:30 my day ends and the agony starts, after the first BM it is all about hot baths and laying down all day until the next day in the morning and so on. I miss all the things i used to do with my friends, and unfortunately no one cares enough to visit. People don't really understand how horrible AF is until they get it. If you think your AF won't heal on its own consider surgery, don't waste your time, happiness and life waiting for some cure that probably won't work.
One last tip: consider your diet, adjust it to what suits your body and AF. I have been on steamed veggies, fruit compotes and soup all week and i was doing well, the pain would only last for an hour or so, soreness persists but it is much easier than the initial pain post BM. I had one small bite size of lamb ribs yesterday, and i paid for it today. I am totally skipping red meat of my menu, sticking with veggies for now. Find out a diet that guarantees you the maximum level of comfort. I hope you get better soon!
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Re: Fear of Eating

Postby Guest » 12 Aug 2011, 22:46

Kristiblue,
I'm from Florida too. We've had quite a few Floridians in here lately.

I thought I read you like PB&J. That's one of my favorites. I use to eat a couple of spoons of PB a day when I had my fissure. Jiff has one w/omega 3's and so does Smart Balance. I didn't notice things being any worse when I ate it. I'm sorry you feel down! I know how depressing it can be. I think you have a good chance with all the info and already having the Nitro. Hang in there! It's rough, I had my fissure 8 months and thought I was going to go insane.
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