Okay so my "examination under anesthesia" is tomorrow and because I had leaking during the physical exam he wanted me to do part of a colonoscopy bowel prep which I've had before and I'm doing that in a few hours...NOT FUN. Not only that, I've been in tears ever since I got up this morning and my nerves are shot. I don't even know what will happen when I come out of anesthesia..I'm going in blind practically. When he examined me he said " it's either a pilonidal cyst or a fistula but I'll want to do the procedure to figure out and then if it's a fistula and we can fix it, we will, and same with pilonidal. I'm scared for many reasons. He never even mentioned me getting a colonoscopy before to see if there was any underlying cause. I had one a couple years ago but my colon was squeaky clean..probably because I'm only a teenager. Anyways, I heard that fistulas can come from people who have Crohn's but I have no symptoms..and the only fistula symptoms I have is leaking from my butt some bleeding after a BM, only on the toilet paper. Didn't spot external hemmies on rectal exam..but maybe internal? GAH, I'm going nuts. I have to wake up tomorrow morning *if I can even get to sleep tonight* at 5 and be there at 7..procedure at 9. I want the leaking to be gone, but I also don't want to wake up from the "examination" not knowing what they did to me. I have this overwhelming fear that even if they fix the fistula..that won't cure my leaking problems. I'm gonna go insane by the end of the night

Hi Travis
I only read the boards as my partner has an AF and has just had surgery so I can't really help but you sound so anxious that I just wanted to give you a hug really! Will you get a chance to speak to your surgeon tomorrow morning before they carry out the examination? Your head is probably full of questions...it might help to actually write them all down and take them with you so you can ask when you get there? If the surgeon is not available try asking the nurse and I'm sure they will be able to put your mind at rest a little. Hope you manage to get some sleep and that the examination gives you a good result and puts your mind at rest xx

Hugs from me, too. Try to keep the faith. I know that these "bottom" problems can drive a person nuts.
Please keep us posted - and I'll pray for you, travis.