Hey pals and gals

Figured I would update you on my status with my fissure and with life in general, since it kind of relates.
Right now I'm 2 months away from finishing graduate school and getting a masters degree in education. Unfortunately, things are getting extremely stressful as my internship is such a horrible situation, and the other intern i used to work with (my moral support!) dropped out of the program. So now my work load has just gone up, and I am trying to balance that with my classes and masters thesis, which I now have to write all by myself.
As for my fissure, i find that the more hectic life gets, the less I take care of myself. I know! Its a horrible thing that I am trying to stop. Its just so damn hard to get 25 grams of fiber in on days that you barely have time to eat! I have been getting some small spasms though, so I really need to get back on my game. No blood, just some spasms and me trying to get all my fiber in ...and finding it to be a big challenge.
I'm also trying to drink more water as I have a history of UTI's and could be sent back to my urologist for some most unpleasant tests if I don't shape up, so I am carrying a huge nalgene bottle with me wherever I go.
I haven't been sleeping well because of all the stress, not only at school but at home as well. I am starting to really want to move out of my house. All my parents really do is fight and I think i'd be better off somewhere quiet, but I am a graduate student, which means I am dirt poor. Oh well, I can deal with that, thats the least of my problems.
Other than that, I am just trying to hang on. School is :
Overwhelming
Crazy
Frustrating
Stressful
but I mark a day off on my calendar every night and I'm trying to hang in there as best as I can. :shock: I cant say that I'm not exhausted though. I'll try to come back here more, I miss this place.

Kate

Thanks for the update and glad to hear that despite all the stress you are fissure free. I think it is normal to have some twinges of pain there when you are stressed. I know I clench down there whenever I get tense and that seems to be where my stress manifests.

Yes, grad school can be very stressful but once you're done, you're done and you won't have to do it again. I am glad I went straight through. I can't imagine going back to school after making money. Plus the homework and paper. EEK. But it will be over soon!

Good luck

Just a few more months....I know how time can be short in grad school--I went through 6 years of it, but the stress is all the more reason to take good care of yourself. Glad to hear you are well otherwise...

Thanks for your support. Life is really tough right now, I simply have to much on my plate and as I am getting ready to go out into the "real world" and get my first job and I am starting to feel more and more unprepared. As a teacher you really just have to go in and do it, and I am afraid that I won't be able to hack it, or that what I do will not be good enough. That worries me.
When you add 2 classes of kids that are experts in giving me trouble and catching me off guard, a masters thesis, classes and projects, an independent study and job searching all together, it creates a lot of stress.
I need to start meditating again or something. :p

Just the fact that you are worried you arne't good enough means that you are. It is the teachers that really don't question their abilities at all that often perform poorly.

The first job is quite the transition but you are way more prepared than the average teacher looking for the first job.

Hang in there Kate! i know how it feels to be totally overwhelmed by everything and to be broke on top of all that. Try to take a little bit of time out for yourself whenever you can - to meditate, exercise, or just read a non-school book. And don't let your nutrition suffer b/c of your schedule...the last thing you need right now is another fissure flare-up!!
Take care

you can do it Kate! keep up the good work.
not sure how you get along with your parents, but maybe surprise them with some flowers or a dinner (yeah, when are you going to find the time to cook them a home cooked meal! :-)) and then when dinner is over, you can ask them to please tone it down because you are almost finishing with your school (hehehehehe).
good luck on the dis!