Dust 2 Dust wrote:Guys I have some bad news to report. Yesterday I was diagnosed with pelvic disfunction. If and when the fissure ever heals I may have to go through months of physical therapy. Sitting is causing me excruciating pain right now. I am having suicidal thoughts daily and I am basically live like a robot mindlessly going through life with no joy. My only reprieve is sleeping.

Having a health issue can be very debilitating but it's temporary. I not only had a fissure but developed an unknown horrible muscle spasm issue that felt like I was sitting on a golf ball at all times. I was so depressed from not being able to simply sit down like a normal person let alone have excruciating pain when having a BM. The spasm issue thankfully was resolved when I left my job 18 months after it first started bothering me. But I lived with that damn fissure pain for over 6 YEARS. I was never suicidal but it sucked. I got the LIS and everything is back to normal for almost 2 years now.

Take a deep breath - you are going to be fine. You are just reacting to the most recent diagnosis. Guess what? It's not a death sentence. These things are usually cured so you will be ok. You don't have terminal cancer or have to have major surgery. I had a lymphoma scare this spring - that was WAY scarier than any fissure issue I had. Fortunately the mystery illness that lasted six weeks was resolved and turned out was like a reaction to medication I was taking for cholesterol!

My dad had muscular dystrophy for most of his life of 78 years. His brother had open heart surgery and was in a lot of pain at the hospital. My dad reassured him, "It will get better. The pain will go away." That gave my uncle so much hope because here was his brother with an incurable neuromuscular disease that was only going to get worse and worse as his muscles atrophied (my dad did become a quadriplegic) telling him he'd get better.

Everyday is a new day. You WILL get through this bump in the road and be happy again. In 30 years you will give anything to be the age you are right now going through the problems you are having right now! On a serious note, talk it out with other people or post how you are doing - that type of thing helps. And go walking. When I was going through a horrible financial situation in 2008-09 during the recession I would go walking to make myself feel better. Exercise is a wonderful tool and it is GREAT for getting the blood flowing to help heal the fissure! Win-Win! Be strong. Believe in yourself and that this will pass. We know you can do this.

If you have pain when sitting and continuous butt pain you may have Piriformis Syndrome. IMine is like a dull ache in the buttcheeks and I cant sit at all. It can be part of pelvic dysfunction. I was diagnosed by a sports medicine Dr but I will be speaking to a pelvic PT soon. They do a physical exam with me lying on table and they'll also ask about your symptoms.

Rich44 you've been a great advisor, both positive and informative. This turmoil of ours is certainly a huge mental toll on us as much as physical. I'm at the bottom of it now, given up everything. Don't care about my diet, smoke a lot, and an slowly gaining all the weight I lost in the past year! But I know I'm just hurting myself and nothing else! So need to motivate myself and bring discipline back to my life.
Dust 2 Dust, yes my major issue is pain that gradually increases with sitting. I don't know if I can have a fissure or a fistula underneath with no outside appearance, but the pain is real. Or, it's a PFD that suddenly poped up out of nowhere! It's might be worsening this new alignment (sitting pain) occurred after I expressed the most stressful time of my life (on a separate issue). Almost like a post traumatic stress disorder experience for me. Anyway, I'll have an appointment next week and hopefully will know more what's going on with me. Thanks and stay positive.

Gee! this auto correcting messes up with my writing nerve wrackingly!
Like "it's worth mentioning this new ailment ..."
not "It's might be worsening this new alignment"!!
And other errors ... but I guess you get my points

Dust 2 Dust wrote:If you have pain when sitting and continuous butt pain you may have Piriformis Syndrome. IMine is like a dull ache in the buttcheeks and I cant sit at all. It can be part of pelvic dysfunction. I was diagnosed by a sports medicine Dr but I will be speaking to a pelvic PT soon. They do a physical exam with me lying on table and they'll also ask about your symptoms.

No, I didn't have that. I thought it may have been levator ani. The best way I can explain it is this: I would have a BM and then try to stand up when finished. Suddenly I have pain and tightness around my tailbone as if the muscles locked there. It would be very painful and tricky to walk. I would go sit down (usually at work) on my chair which was really painful but then it would release the spasm and I was instantly better. Over time I started feeling the sensation that I was sitting on a golf ball at all times - even on a couch or trying to sit cross-legged on the floor. I wasn't even having the spasm but the golf ball sensation was there. My CRS couldn't quite figure it out other than tell me "Break the cycle."

When I quit my hated job this spasm and golf ball issue went away within a week!!! I had broken the cycle! That was in 2016. Over the years I sometimes would start to feel it coming back on rare occasions and I might even have a slight spasm but I found a way to put pressure on the muscle with my finger and it would release immediately and I was good to go. Overall it's gone. It was stress related.

Fred55 wrote:Rich44 you've been a great advisor, both positive and informative. This turmoil of ours is certainly a huge mental toll on us as much as physical. I'm at the bottom of it now, given up everything. Don't care about my diet, smoke a lot, and an slowly gaining all the weight I lost in the past year! But I know I'm just hurting myself and nothing else! So need to motivate myself and bring discipline back to my life.

You are quite welcome. I love helping people and I know sticking around here as a guide has definitely made a difference to some board members.

You can imagine over 6+ years with my fissure issue that I learned to live with it even though I certainly hoped for it to go away. I cannot say it enough - the LIS surgery was the best decision. It was so easy and recovery was what, 10 days? Fissure was healed by the time I went back 3 weeks post-op. It's been 22 months and I have been normal since then. Obviously I waited way too long like many people. But I'll repeat myself - once I was now straining every single time just to have a BM that was it. I was done. Give me the surgery.

I lost 50 pounds in 2020 on purpose (I was sick of being overweight and my glucose was creeping up). I got down to a normal BMI (in fact some said I was too skinny). By January 2022 I had put back on 15 pounds and I was furious with myself for allowing that to happen. I lost the 15 pounds by May this year and I am back to being around the normal weight. I am also 50 years old and I have to take better care of myself. I know I want to stay at a nice healthy weight from now on - so I've been walking an average of 4-5 miles a day and been motivated to do so. I never smoked, no drugs or alcohol, I don't drink my calories so no sugary drinks, no juice, no nothing but water (and I am fine with it). There is no doubt that being overweight and overeating contributed to my demise. I fact, the day I had the big fissure that started it all I had eaten a Caniac Combo at Raising Cane's Chicken Fingers in Fort Collins, Colorado on vacation. That was 6 tenders, a lot of fries, two piece of Texas Toast and 2-3 sauces to dip plus Coke. Back then that was a typical meal for me. Today if I go there I usually get a 3 piece, fries with one piece of toast and water if I go at all. And you have to believe that all the walking I am doing has to be great for BM's.

Yes indeed Rich44! Your story intriguingly resembles mine but a couple of years apart! I used to smoke very occasionally and since 3 years ago I quit and took care of my body. I lost around 40 pounds with exercise and diet. I eliminated carbs and sugar, most of red meat, and was on chicken, fish and lots of vegetables. I could clearly see how all that was good on my overall health. But this lingering issue broke me down! I'm so depressed that I resorted to smoking after 3 yrs of absolutely no smoking! I know it's stupid! But this issue was tough for me, never thought may face such a problem and it totally got me off-guard l. I now know I should quit whining about unimportant matters in life when it can be way worst dealing with health issues. Anyways, thanks again for your help

It's been a month and botox did not work at all. I'm still spasming like crazy every time I sit down. My sphincter is so tight right now it's ridiculous. I assume my pelvic dysfunction has made everything so tight I was too far gone for botox to work.. Should have listened to Rich and said no the moment CRS brought it up.

Dust 2 Dust wrote:It's been a month and botox did not work at all. I'm still spasming like crazy every time I sit down. My sphincter is so tight right now it's ridiculous. I assume my pelvic dysfunction has made everything so tight I was too far gone for botox to work.. Should have listened to Rich and said no the moment CRS brought it up.

Oh boy. Ok listen. I had Botox too and it didn’t work for me either. Based on the severity of your situation (mentally and physically) you should talk to a CRS and consider surgery. This is a bump in the road. You will get through this.

Thanks Rich! You are a real asset to the board. Should have heeded your advice. My 8 week diltiazem and botox followup is scheduled in 3 weeks.

Do the follow up and just see what's next. I know I keep repeating myself but this issue will eventually pass. Believe it or not I more or less got used to having pain with most BM's. Once the severe wave would pass where the pain was a solid 8-9, it would go down to a 5-7 and even though that could be rough, it was nothing as bad as a 9 so I was ok with it. Everyone is different so I don't want to compare myself to your situation. You have your own issues and you want them gone ASAP.

Besides the rectal problem, is there anything stressing you out in your life these days? Your job, financial situation, love life, family, friends, etc? You don't have to disclose personal info, but if you can pinpoint a trigger and work on that you may see your spasm issue get better overnight.