kamard2300 wrote:Thank you very much
Were your symtoms also constant 24/7?
I need to be strong as you
Im just à little girl this is too much for me
Anxiety about my symtoms makes them stick I need to break the andiety toward symptoms
Oh I thought you were a guy! This thread was about men with this issue.
Ok...
My symptoms at their worst were only after I went to the bathroom and went to stand up. That was when the muscles locked up. I would sit on it at work to make it go away but I learned how to stop the spasm by sticking my finger in the muscle and pushing hard while I was standing. I didn't stick my finger inside my anus, just into the muscle near it. I got used to that routine. Once I diffused the spasm, the pain was very mild (remember the fissure was the big pain the butt!). So the pain from it was only severe for less than a minute and mostly tolerable after I ended the spasm. It was very frustrating that it felt like I was sitting on a golf ball all the time.
Back in World War II they built the Alaska Highway. It was a tough job to do in remote Canada and Alaska and it was VERY cold most of the year. They hired some native Eskimos along with Americans and Canadians. Everyone assumed the Eskimos didn't complain because it was in their genes to tolerate the cold better. That was not true at all. The difference was the Eskimos expected to be cold and dealt with it. I expected pain with the spasms and fissure and I adjusted to accept it. It worked. I never loved it but I managed ok most of the time. There are all sorts of books and videos on pain management. A lot of it is mental. But at the same time, you need to keep finding out how to break this cycle. So like I said, see more doctors, see therapists, get books, everything you can think of. But I bet the anxiety is part of it.
As to you being a little girl - stop putting yourself down. It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog. You need to stop using that "I'm just a weak little girl." I know plenty of little girls who are strong and plenty of tall girls who are weak! Yes, you need to be strong and I am no stronger than you are. You are sounding like your own worst enemy. Believe in yourself. You WILL get past this!