Does your spouse understand?

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Does your spouse understand?

Postby dhc » 01 May 2022, 16:52

My wife has a hard time understanding how hard this is for me. She complains that this has been going on for 4 months and seems to think that I am, if not making it up, at least being overly dramatic. Do any of you have this problem? I also find it hard to believe that the pain has been this severe and has lasted this long. Also, hard to believe that the doctors offer so little help. Reading your experiences on this forum have helped a lot. Thanks.
dhc
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Re: Does your spouse understand?

Postby Rich44 » 03 May 2022, 14:44

dhc wrote:My wife has a hard time understanding how hard this is for me. She complains that this has been going on for 4 months and seems to think that I am, if not making it up, at least being overly dramatic. Do any of you have this problem? I also find it hard to believe that the pain has been this severe and has lasted this long. Also, hard to believe that the doctors offer so little help. Reading your experiences on this forum have helped a lot. Thanks.
Sorry to hear about your pain. You are in the right place.

First off - no, I never had the problem where my wife didn't believe I was in agony (I can't believe I even have to say that). Tell your wife that many women have said their fissure was more painful than bearing a child. You have had it for four months and can't believe the pain has lasted that long? Wait until it's been four years and is worse than ever.

What do you mean that the doctors offer so little help? What did doctors have you been to, what did they say and what are you currently doing to manage and cure this?
Chronic Fissure June 2014 - October 2020
Botox, skin tag removed - February 2015
Levator Ani September 2014 - February 2016 (caused by stress - left my job, cured!)
Lateral Internal Sphincterectomy, skin tags removed - October 2020
Fissure 100% healed!
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Re: Does your spouse understand?

Postby dhc » 03 May 2022, 16:08

Should have been more explicit. I was referring specifically to pain relief. They offered lidocaine ointment which did not help much. Tylenol, etc. But nothing that really worked. Others on the forum stated that heat helped them the most and I also found that to be the case. I got Botox a month ago and am almost better. No painful BM. A little irritation. I think the combination of Botox and increased fiber did the trick. Not out of the woods completely but much better. I have been seeing a gastroenterologist. Others have been seeing a CRS. What do you think?
dhc
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Re: Does your spouse understand?

Postby Rich44 » 03 May 2022, 18:14

A gastroenterologist doesn't deal with fissures. They can probably give you general advice but if it doesn't work you need to see a CRS for treatment. Since you are doing better, I would stay the course. But you made it sound like you were still in agony. Botox can help but be warned it will eventually wear off so you need to get working on healing the fissure before it wears off. Increasing the fiber is what you should doing so that is good. You do want bulky stools - stay away from stool softeners. If you rely on softeners your BM will be too loose and your sphincter may tighten. If that happens, the blood flood needed to heal the fissure will be reduced and your fissure will take longer and longer to heal. Also do everything you can to reduce stress. Get rid of your wife, that should help. Just kidding! But be mindful that stress can make your rectal problem worse. It definitely did for me.
Chronic Fissure June 2014 - October 2020
Botox, skin tag removed - February 2015
Levator Ani September 2014 - February 2016 (caused by stress - left my job, cured!)
Lateral Internal Sphincterectomy, skin tags removed - October 2020
Fissure 100% healed!
Rich44
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Posts: 128
Joined: 07 Feb 2021, 16:41
Location: Chicago, IL
Has thanked: 7 times
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Gender: Male


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