Newbie Here- long venting post

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Newbie Here- long venting post

Postby PhissurePhil » 21 Apr 2016, 08:55

So, I've been in major daily butt pain for about the last 3 months. I assumed what I had was hemorrhoids as I have had some off and on again symptoms for about 2 1/2 years that I figured were job related stress from my new job I've had in the last 3 years. I was in daily post-BM pain for months leading up to vacation and I thought things would be ok while at the beach but I was even more of a wreck. Work serves as a distraction from the pain but I was a grumpy dad and husband for most of our week at the beach. My wife insisted I go to the doctor on our return and I went to Patient First. It was good to finally talk about it with someone but the PA did not examine me and said I needed to see a specialist. It took almost 3 weeks to get an appointment and finally saw a CRS on Tuesday and was diagnosed with AF. I've been assuming hemorrhoids for 3 months and obsessing/researching, etc. Tuesday was nice to know but the CRS was in such a hurry I didn't have time ask questions. I did not know what I didn't know.

I've now told some of my work colleagues what I've been going through. This helps them understand some of my erratic behavior. They thought I was looking for another job. lol. I will say, however, that has crossed my mind. On my worst days, I blame work for the stress related to my issues. Still unpacking the impact of stress on AF. It's a new paradigm for me now knowing that I suffer from AF not hemorrhoids. My kids are 9 and 12 so it's a little hard for them to understand but I feel terrible when I take out my pain frustration on my family. In just a couple of nights perusing this board, I've become much more aware of everything that is involved. It's been very helpful!

I have a follow up appointment with my CRS in 2 weeks. Meanwhile, I'm locking down on diet, taking fiber powder, twice daily sitz baths and using a prescription cream. I was convinced I needed hemorrhoid surgery based on a friend's experience and the Patient First PA consultation. Now I'm not sure. It seems that a lifestyle change may help but this has gone on for a long time. Knowing is half the battle now. One HUGE concern I have is that I am a runner. My running has waned in the last few months but I have completed 7 marathons and am concerned if I'll ever be able to get back into running.

At this point, only my wife (2 kids, sort of), college friend, and 3 co-workers know about this. I already feel better reading many of your experiences and typing this entry here. I'll need to see how the next couple of weeks unfold before I possibly share with others.

Thanks for reading this long post if you have. I see this community as a great path towards the emotional end of the healing process.
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Re: Newbie Here- long venting post

Postby brokenbottom » 21 Apr 2016, 09:09

Hello there PP! Sorry you find yourself here, but it is an amazing support isn't it?

Sounds like you're doing all the right things - seeking medical help and watching what you eat. Fibre and water are a big help - and painkillers of course! I dearly hope that you'll find relief from your pain very soon - it is possible, you just have to find the route that works for you. Good luck!
Suffered acute AFs since about 2010
2015 Chronic AF diagnosed
18/2/16 Botox (unsuccessful)
12/4/16 Lateral anal sphincterotomy and removal of polyp and two tags
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