Pain is unrelenting I am fading away

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Pain is unrelenting I am fading away

Postby hurtinend » 12 Feb 2018, 21:19

I've lost 10 pounds in the last 30 days. Not much interest in eating anymore. The throbbing burning pain up the end is constant. Absolutely nothing helps. Not getting anywhere with my doctor, so am going to see a crs through private pay at the end of Feb, if I make it that long.

Feel like my life is over at 50.
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Re: Pain is unrelenting I am fading away

Postby Hopefull123 » 12 Feb 2018, 21:52

No, please stay strong and get your mind out of these dark thoughts. I ve gone through the same, but what saved me was my spiritual strength. I don't know if you are spiritual or religious, but faith helps a lot. I believe there is an energetic imbalance for every physical disbalance. Try to stay still, clear your mind and ask what is it that you need to learn from this. What is it that you need to let go of in your life, or what to change. Answers will come if you relax and are open to listen. I started getting better when I let go of all fears, forgave every single person I have ever known in my life and started cleaning my energies through love and light. I am no longer scared of surgery if I have to go that route. I learned that I need to become brave just like the warriors fighting on the frontline. And I learned that I am not alone. I love everyone here and I admire every soul for their courage to keep on fighting and learning about themselves along the process. Even if we don't realize now that we are actually learning in much bigger scale, the truth is that one day we will.
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Re: Pain is unrelenting I am fading away

Postby hurtinend » 12 Feb 2018, 21:59

I appreciate your comment, I do have a spiritual side and hold a lot of regret for past mistakes.

However this pain has overtaken me and I do not see a solution anymore. It has made me bitter and angry. I have not worked in over a year due to the pain. I need imminent relief but there is none.
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Re: Pain is unrelenting I am fading away

Postby OttawaMarc1234 » 12 Feb 2018, 22:26

Me too in constant 24/7 bum thoughts. The Cancer doesnt help with the Bonus Anal Fissure. Yet another bad day today. Burning from hell despite Calmoseptine Cream and Nifidipine Baclofen Lidocaine Cream. Zippo relief. Beeing sick since Friday Night with Flu Symptoms has gunged me up and caused Diarehea too.

Woke up this morning with razor blades in my ass feeling...worst ever in 5 years of on again off again Anal Fissure.

Was supposed to see the Onocolgist today but too sick and tired...after many frustrating phone calls was finally able to reschedule him and my Colonscopy until next month(March).My second attempt at an MRI is next Thursday. First try disaster with nurse angry and rough with me trying to put Contrast into a vien....couldnt find an arm vein. Tried 6 times and gave up!

Severely gunged up tonight despite a walk this evening in the mild winter night. Took my Psyllium Cranberry Cocktail at 4pm.No bowel movement. Took my Restorlax Cranberry Cocktail at 9pm...still no bowel movement. Just tried a hot bath...still frigging gunged up. Madness!!....then the Razor Blades start all over. I am a 56 year old Canadian Male.

Called my Shoppers Drug Mart Pharmist(call him or other Pharmicists more frequently these days!) Asked him if I could try the Glicerin Suppositories I got yesterday...he advised me against them cause of possible more Burning Pain.

By the way : BS Falicy out there in the Health Community. You cannot call your doctor...you cannot show up at his office without an appointment. He does NOT take personal calls from his patients.

Damn never ending ongoing advice I hear all the time in Ottawa fromi Nurses...go see your Doctor right way. Terrible misinformation!!
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Re: Pain is unrelenting I am fading away

Postby hurtinend » 12 Feb 2018, 22:37

you could try some magnesium citrate liquid if you are gummed up. Usually works by morning. Available at pharmacy.

I'm sorry you are in pain too. Wish you healing.
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Re: Pain is unrelenting I am fading away

Postby OttawaMarc1234 » 12 Feb 2018, 22:38

Hurry up and Invent Full Body Transplants...our Brain into a different healthy Brad Pitt Body!!
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Re: Pain is unrelenting I am fading away

Postby OttawaMarc1234 » 12 Feb 2018, 22:41

Appreciate the feedback. This site aint as popular as it used to be. Very sad. Got lots of Instant advice 3 years ago here when I had my initual fissure. Beat it on my own with high fibre Metamucil hot baths Nefidipine Cream...now have Squamous Anal Cancer...and my Damn fissure came back after a 3 year Holiday.
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Re: Pain is unrelenting I am fading away

Postby OttawaMarc1234 » 12 Feb 2018, 22:46

I hate the relentless tests and waiting. I will need Chemo and Radiation to hopefully annilate this tumour on my butt cheek. Daily suffering until then is so miserable. Thoughts of jumping infront of a bus came up last week.Shrugged it off.

Honestly I am still in denile of my Cancer...yes being smoking all my life. Quit booze 29 years ago.Was in AA. Smoking is harder and all the recent Cancer talk hasnt made me stop you would think...rather smoking more cause of all the pain and stress!!
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Re: Pain is unrelenting I am fading away

Postby hurtinend » 12 Feb 2018, 22:51

I'm very sorry to hear that, double whammy for you. Still lots of great people on this site, but not as vibrant as years ago I agree.
I think I beat my fissure 5 or 6 times, but it's the gift that keeps on giving.

Truth be told I had never heard of "anal fissure" until I was diagnosed in the ER circa 2007. What a ride.
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Re: Pain is unrelenting I am fading away

Postby OttawaMarc1234 » 12 Feb 2018, 23:05

The Shoppers Drug Mart 24 hour Pharmacists are the best. Pending what city you live in...I found now with my Cell phone...Free Canada Wide Long Distance Calling Option...I call them in T.O. for free when no one is available late at night when in pain and cant sleep.

Telehealth Ontario useless and long waits. Always telling you take an Ambulance to Hospital.Bottom line there...they really cant acess you over the phone!
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