Unbearable Pain

losing hope

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Unbearable Pain

Postby PIMA » 06 Mar 2014, 11:15

I've never been in this much pain in my life. This compares to nothing I have ever felt before, ever. I am considering the surgery, as this lovely AF will not heal on it's own. I am completely miserable and bringing my family on the ride with me makes me feel worse. I found this blog and thought, why not?! So far it has provided some good info. So thanks! At least I know I'm not in this boat alone.

I consulted with my CRS last week and am pretty sure the anal exam aggravated the fissure. This is the worst pain I've been in since it started in December. I am using Nifed/Lido, flexeril, a cocktail of OTC pain relievers round-the-clock, switched from Citracel to Metamucil and have just switched to taking Norco with a stool softener. Oh, and I succumbed to Dr. Wheatgrass Super balm (snake oil) recommendation. Sitz baths, high fiber diet, the works...I'm doing it all! Periodic relief at best, but when it hurts...OMG!

I seriously can't drive or ride in the car, sitting is really not an option for me for that passed week. This is bordering on RIDICULOUS! My CRS wants me to go in to his office, 45 minute drive, to consult about the surgery...OMG! I can't be in the car that long. I told his nurse that and whatever, I'm waiting for his call. I could be waiting awhile, right.

I am frustrated with the pain and my quality of life is, well, this is no quality of life. I'm miserable and losing hope. I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel and I want to give up. I'm even crying to a blog for Pete's sake!
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Re: Unbearable Pain

Postby Sunshine » 06 Mar 2014, 11:52

Hi Pima.
My heart goes out to you. We have all either been there, or are also going through this with you.
It is without a doubt, the most painfull thing to experiance. But believe me, it does get better.

I know at the most painful times it just makes you want to give up, but please believe me, it will get better.
The trouble with fissures, is that there is no "quick Fix", but it sounds like you are doing the right things, sitz, meds, fibre diet, so you will hopefully start to notice some improvement soon. Are you drinking plenty of water?
This site is just amazing, and reading through other peoples posts may help you to find something else that works for you. If nothing else, it is so good to share with other people who understand your pain.

If the nurse doesnt call you back, phone again. Is it possible to get a lift to see the CRS? So at least you wouldnt have to be the driver and could perch on a cheek, something I have had to do many times when sitting on my poor bum wasnt an option!

There is always someone on here, so any questions or help, advice or just to vent, just come back here.
There really is light at the end of the tunnell, try to stay strong, even when you feel like giving up.

And as I said, read other peoples stories, they really can help.

Wishing you a painfree bum.
Love & Sunshine to you x
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Re: Unbearable Pain

Postby ButtQueen » 06 Mar 2014, 12:16

How long have you been on nifed? I have heard it takes a few weeks to finally begin working. For me, lidocaine was absolute rubbish. I wonder why most CRSs seem to think of it as some sort of a magical ointment! It did nothing to reduce my pain episodes, did not even take the edge off of it.

Sunshine is right. The thing with fissures is that they take a lot of patience and time. LOTS of it. You need to let the meds work themselves out. It wasn't until I finished my third month into this ordeal (mine began in Nov' 13) that I begun to see any improvement. I know it would take a lot of time for my bum to get back to normal, but at least I am not in absolute agony and walking around as if a broomstick is stuck up my ass all the time!!
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Re: Unbearable Pain

Postby PIMA » 06 Mar 2014, 14:10

Thank you for the encouraging words. Norco kicked in a little while ago and now I don't even know I have a butt, ha! Narcotics are not the way to go and besides, I'm also a recovering alcoholic of 12 years...so, yeah, taking narcotics is not really what I want to do. But, I might just make it to the CRS office for that appt today. My hubby is driving and my mother is coming in tomorrow to lend a hand.

@ButtQueen, I've been using Nifed/Lido for 8 weeks...the docs say use it twice a day. That's a joke! You are right, does not even touch the pain during an episode, nada, zilch, no way! So I use with every bathroom trip. And, I'm stopping at the pharmacy to pick up more relatively useless ointment later today. I had a couple good days, but those are fewer and father apart than I like. I will keep reading and posting here and hopefully get some relief sooner rather than later. Ugh!
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Re: Unbearable Pain

Postby Scientist2516 » 06 Mar 2014, 15:03

Wishing you all the best, PIMA. I've been where you are, and now it's just a horrible memory, so I promise you there is light at the end of the tunnel. Grit your teeth and hang in there. Good to know your family is being supportive.

Neither nifed nor lido did one thing for me. Try diltiazem or nitro. One of them may work better. Nitro did cure me (as well as the other things I did, which you are also doing).

Have you tried sitting on a heat pad or hot water bottle to soothe your bum? It helped me a lot.
Good luck with the appt - let us know how it went.
Nifedipine/lidocaine, no help
Diltiazem, effective, but caused major rash
Nitroglycerine, effective.
Topical estrogen for final healing.
Gentle heat to bottom - pain relief, muscle relaxant
Kondremul mineral oil
Time - lots of time.
Status - Healed!
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Re: Unbearable Pain

Postby PIMA » 06 Mar 2014, 20:15

just a quick update... i made it to the CRS appt today to learn that my fissure is indeed infected. And something about a fistula trapping bacteria or something. Regardless it was the info we needed to explain the extreme, debilitating pain. We scheduled surgery for Monday morning. I could have gone in tomorrow, but opted to start an anti-bio with pain relievers through the weekend. My son's 4th birthday party is Saturday and we opted to stay with the devil we know, not risking the unknown of surgery recovery...the devil we don't know. I can make it through the weekend, now that i can see light at the end of the tunnel. My objective now is to read all posts regarding LIS to prepare for the next phase of this awful journey. Glad I found this group! thanks so much.
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Re: Unbearable Pain

Postby ButtQueen » 06 Mar 2014, 20:42

Ohhh mine got infected too and was cleared up by anti-biotics so no worries there PIMA. Congratulations on getting that surgery done. Soon you will be free of pain forever!!! Please do come back and share your success story with us :D
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Re: Unbearable Pain

Postby nurseebol » 06 Mar 2014, 20:50

I guess everyone is different. I went through the fissure, now dealing with fistulotomy-but the way mine was, essentially gave me a fissure back to heal I see. That being said. I find the soaks to irritate it. I don't do them. I clean up after BM in the shower, and use ice for pain and ibuprofen. I use coconut oil suppositories as well as Miralax and mineral oil (by mouth) and a smidge of benefiber. I tried the nifedpine, and found it useless. My fissured healed without it. The fistula, I blame myself, I was cleaning back there with Qtips of all things and got my fissure infected by getting bacteria under a flap of skin back there. That was my mistake. But essential I had it healed. That is what works for me. Driving sucks. Get a memory foam pillow
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Re: Unbearable Pain

Postby Sunshine » 07 Mar 2014, 06:58

Oh PIMA well done for getting to your appointment.
Thats so good you now know what you are dealing with, and fantastic that your CRS is getting you into surgery so fast.

I hope you don't have too much pain over the weekend and can enjoy your 4 year olds birthday.
Please let us know how surgery goes, you are certainly heading in the right direction now.

Wishing you love & Sunshine. X :sunny:
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Re: Unbearable Pain

Postby MB-YVR » 07 Mar 2014, 18:26

PIMA

I totally relate to your expression and info concerning fissures and unbearable pain. I almost laughed when I read about the Wheatgrss since I tried that, and a billion other things. A quick note.

Do you know if the fissure is being caused by/exacerbated by higher than normal anal sphincter pressure? That is the only good reason for an LIS surgery. There are major gender differences in likelihood of fecal incontinence following LIS. More women have hard-to-heal fissures because of a lack of vascularity in the region, and not high resting anal pressure.

Therefore, many colo-rectal journal reviews of the surgery outcomes (which sadly I have read) recommend, for women with normal or below normal anal sphincter resting pressure, a different surgical approach, including either anal advancement flap surgery or a fissurectomy.

In my case, I had both and in the end, it took an additional treatment of hyperbaric oxygen therapy in order for my fissure to heal. I did not venture anywhere near LIS because I knew that I did not have high resting anal sphincter pressure. This theory was confirmed with clinical data and also, the lack of efficacy of botox injections.

SO. I am sure you are getting great advice. But based on my own experience, I feel compelled to share what I know since there are still some old school colo-rectal surgeons out there, who ignore the huge gender differences in fissures - both what causes them and outcomes of fissure surgery.

Wishing you the very best.
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