Sorry I should have said the top of the general discussion sub forum. Here's the link: self-dilation-t4261.html

Thank you. I'm hesitant to use even the smallest size dilators because I can barely get my pinkie finger in there while applying coconut oil a half inch to an inch into my anus. I guess that means I have a very tight sphincter, yes? Which is all the more reason to want to get it to relax and stretch...but on the other hand it makes me afraid that I will easily tear my two fissures further by inserting a dilator. Any suggestions about this would be very appreciated. Thanks!

Hi Trillo I know what you mean by being so tight an sore to put anything in there an yes this is the main problem it's a muscle and mind problem we need to try to relax an try to stop our minds from associating our anus with pain and get out muscle to relax start off with deep breathing to relax your mind and body then start slow by just touching the area you'll probably find the slightest touch causes tightness and rejection but if you can start by building up the connection by gentle touch each day after deep breathing then slowly you'll get to insert then gentle massage it mite take you 1 week it mite take you 6 weeks go slow and best of luck

Thanks, missy moo. Question: What kind of lubrication do you or anyone else reading this use with a dilator? I'm thinking that the usual lubricants that are used for sexual purposes might not be good for our purpose, since we need to be careful about what comes in contact with an anal fissure. Maybe coconut oil wold work as a lubricant?

Coconut oil is good, I personally avoid using vaseline unless I know a harder BM is about to come. Vaseline works better for protecting the fissure during a BM because it is thicker. For manual dilation coconut oil is quite ok.

Abu wrote:Coconut oil is good, I personally avoid using vaseline unless I know a harder BM is about to come. Vaseline works better for protecting the fissure during a BM because it is thicker. For manual dilation coconut oil is quite ok.

Do you know of a link to any instructions for manual dilation? I've read people saying that they do this for ten minutes or so, and all the positions I can think of in which to do this seem like they would be very uncomfortable to do for more than a minute or two.

Someone added the link at the top of this page if you use coconut oil just keep adding some because I find it absorbs really well into the skin

I use aloe cadabra lubricant (plain version) for rectal dilation and have had zero problems with it. No burning or irritation at all. It's thicker than regular lubricants so it stays put. I've never tried coconut oil for this purpose, so can't say how it would work.

The child's pose yoga position works best for this kind of work if using dilators.

I'm new here. Can you explain what a dilator is for?

Dilators can be used to make the muscles & tissues more used to passing a bowel movement. Women may use vaginal dilators if they have pain during intercourse. There's more information on this thread: self-dilation-t4261.html