I'm actually astounded I went all through 2011 without finding this site. To be fair, I didn't do a lot of checking (poor research skills on my part, and a death knell for a physiology major I suppose. Perhaps I should change to the arts...), but I'm here now, so I guess I'll tell you my story.
Hi, I'm Andy. I'm 21 years old in... a week exactly, and I do a Bachelor of Science at Monash University (Australia).
About two and a half years ago, I started exercising like crazy. I was fairly unfit to begin with, but I found I enjoyed my new routine of running twice a day, plus gym three times a week. Overkill to most people, but hey, I was liked keeping myself on the move, and it worked well around my uni course, as there was a gym on campus. Then, about halfway through 2010 I developed an anal fissure. It took me a while to work up the courage to talk to the doctor, but I found not being able to sit down for any length of time a great motivator, and it didn't seem to be going away any time soon. So I was prescribed Rectogesic ointment. I was a bit skeptical about the application method, considering the location of my ailment, but I got over it quickly and the fissure left in about a week or so. No biggie. Of course, I got right back to exercising.
Skip to midway through Feb 2011, and the anal fissure came back. Well, thought I, I don't really need to see the doctor again, do I? Nope, I'll just get some more of that ointment!
Two months and three tubes later, I decided that the fissure wasn't going away any time soon, and the ointment wasn't helping. After seeing a doctor however, he simply prescribed the same stuff. I took it on his word, and kept on using it. Skip forward several more months, and several more tubes, and I decided to try a different doctor. He prescribed the same stuff, and also told me to use a laxative.
More months, more tubes, and several stool softeners later, I was getting pretty desperate. The pain was steadily increasing, I hadn't exercised in over half a year, and my self-confidence was... well, to be honest I'd never really had much to begin with, but it was at an all time low. I was only just scraping by in my uni studies as I could barely concentrate, I collapsed into tears on numerous occasions, several whilst in the middle of my part-time job, which I almost quit on account of having no motivation to do anything at all any more, and was developing suicidal thoughts.
The doctor suggested surgery. I took it. (I know I've gone on long enough here, and I totally could go on for way longer, but I'm trying to wrap this up for your benefit if you took the time to read all this rubbish) That happened mid November.
So here I am, fast approaching the anniversary of the day I stopped exercising. Most of the pain from the inflammation is gone, but there is still a small area that for some reason refuses to heal, which I'm afraid may need more surgery to fix. It's enough to let me go for walks, but I'm now utterly terrified of any sort of strenuous exercise like I used to enjoy. That, and I'm essentially back to the same level of fitness I was before I seriously started exercising. I can't help but think that I wasted two years of my life, having spent so much time of one year getting fit, and the next losing it all. I've lost several friends, as I mostly avoided social situations at all costs during 2011. I'm now on anti-depressants, by request of my mum, although I'm now in an entirely different emotional state than I was to begin with, which I don't think any amount of drugs is going to fix. Oh, and I've spent over $500 on Rectogesic alone.
tl;dr
So yeah, I had an anal fissure for a year, and it kinda broke me. Had surgery, and now I'm almost, but not quite, healed, and I don't know exactly what I can do to fix it, short of more surgery.
If there's any good to be found in my experience, it's that my diet now includes more fibre stone fruit than it ever did before consists entirely of fibre and stone fruit.
Many thanks, if you managed to sit through all of that. It's not something I felt inclined to discuss with many people, so it's kinda nice to get it out in the open; it's more for my benefit than yours, I imagine. Still, it's also nice if somebody else finds it interesting as well.

Hi there,
Welcome! Sorry you have found your way to us, so to speak, but just about all of us will find something we recognise it what you write. That is the joy of anal fissures... And we always enjoy reading what others have to say about their fissures, so awful as it is, you're truly welcome here.
Just to get to the basics.
Did you have LIS, and do you know how much was actually done? It's not uncommon that doctors are cautious, and may not 'cut' enough, requiring the joy of a second LIS (I have not had one, I am aiming, if I cannot heal myself, to go for the SAD).
I too think I started myself off with exercise...but I got it during a time that I wasn't exercising, so who knows.
Not quite sure what you mean that your diet consists entirely of fibre and stone fruit. Taking a flyer here, you don't want to totally overdo the fibre. Just have enough. And enough water to balance everything.
You said that you had your surgery in mid-November. You will find quite a few who have had surgery on here who will tell you that it can take a year to really heal. There are some oldies worth reading - HappyAss, Neuropathic Guy, among others. Just to read how they healed. You could also read wecc's posts. They make for good reading too, about someone who took another route. These three are men, by the way. Need a hand to find them, just let me know.
Don't be ashamed of the anti-depressants or thoughts of wanting to wack yourself . A lot of us have been to that point. People in general do not realise just how debilitating this darn thing is. As far as I am concerned, having a baby was easier than this mess.
Is Rectogesic Nitro or a calcium channel blocker? I have only used the CCB, and I used that for ages. Only on the surface, as my CRS suggested. It helped, I think, though am not done with the whole thing yet.
Do you use a Sitz bath to soak? I've found that to be one of the most healing parts of the whole saga. Just five minutes in, and then a change of water. Three times usually, though if I can't be 'done' (TMI WARNING), I sit on it and finish off. It is a tremendous relief.
I also used vaseline, but have taken myself off that now, as we would have greasy bums if we were meant to when born. I have noticed a slight improvement - though I don't want to jinx myself - since that. However, I think we are all different in what heals us.
Amazing, years ago I was told my anus was tight every time I went for my yearly pap smear. Thought that was great. Only in recent years have realised that were talking fissures and not incontinence.
About exercise in general. If you can't do what you could before, do what you can. All in moderation.
Many of us have the losing friends bit. The good ones stay though, and this really weeds out the chaff.
I'm sure that others will come and answer with info about diet and water and such. And the healing. It takes time.
Ramble, ramble. Hope it's a help to you to know that we are all here for the same reason. The forum was actually started by an Australian!
Keep reading; keep researching. And hang in there!!

Hey Andronicus,
So sorry the surgery wasn't all you hoped. But it did help you.
Walking is great exercise and good for meditation.
Are you still using the rectogesic?
Make sure you are getting all the vitamins you need. You just need to make sure your BMs are the consistency of toothpaste of soft serve ice cream (I will never look at an ice cream cone the same way again since joining this forum! lol :D )
So fibre and lots of water, but also all the nutrients you need too.
Thanks for sharing your story.
What does your crs suggest?
I kinda agree with Sav, just be a bit more patient, as awful as that sounds. You sound so close!
-Tanya

I'm rather ashamed to admit that I'm actually a little hazy on the details of the surgery. The specialist told me they were going to perform a "skin tag flap", and that this was supposed to allow for greater blood flow to the area to allow it to heal, or soemthing like that. I know it sounds very irresponsible of me, but beyond "this procedure will relieve the pain", any further details seemed completely irrelevant. To be perfectly honest, I'd have let them drill a hole in my head if they said it might help. I do have a follow-up appointment later in the month where I plan on getting some more information, now that my head is somewhat clearer.
I guess I kinda exaggerated on the fibre thing, although most of my meals certainly now revolve around consuming as much fibre as possible. I already drink plenty of water, so I don't think that's a problem either. I still get a fairly varied diet, although considering I'm also vegetarian, I guess it couldn't hurt looking into a few vitamin supplements as well. I may need to do some research first.
The active component in Rectogesic is glyceryl trinitrate. It definitely helped me out the first time, that's why I was so keen on just using more when it came around the second time. It got to the point where I was actually positive that using the Rectogesic was making the problem worse, although I have a theory why. I think the fissure itself wasn't the problem, but it caused some kind of chronic smooth muscle inflammation that just got worse the more stimulation it received, regardless of the effect of the ointment. That's just a theory though; I'm no doctor. I can't really think of any other reason why the Rectogesic was so useless the second time round.
I did take more baths than I used to, but they never really made much difference either. After having the operation, the doctor recommended taking salt baths twice a day the help the healing. I don't know if they actually helped at all, but I sure as hell went through a lot of salt.
Being able to at least walk again is... nice, but still incredibly unsatisfying. Running became a sort of escape from the real world for me, where I could just withdraw and focus. I really missed that the most.
Throughout the whole ordeal, for the most part I only really ever hinted at what I had to those around me. For the first eight or so months, I just put on a smile and tried to stay positive. I'm pretty good at bottling stuff up and putting on the brave face. After those eight months of unrelenting pain though, I guess I just stopped smiling. Everyone knew something was going on, but all I felt comfortable saying was that I was having health problems; I didn't want to say anything more for fear of making them think I was just being whiny and attention-seeking. If anyone noticed I was limping (when the pain was at its worst, I tended to hobble a bit), I just said I had a sore leg. Lying about it didn't really help at all though, as I kept turning down my friends' offers to refer me to their orthopedist of choice. I ended up shutting most people out, and just stopped speaking to most of my friends. I managed to work up the courage to tell three of my best friends, and they seemed to understand at least. It certainly helped, being able to finally get some of it off my chest, but that was much later down the track. Most of the damage was already done. I think I'll have to track down some of my old friends and at least try to offer some kind of explanation as to why I just ceased contact, regardless of how they react.
I feel like I've already waited far too long to be rid of this, but after coming to this forum, it seems like I'm lucky to have had my problem for only twelve months. I'm still just... tired of watching my life pass me by, while I sit here waiting to be free of this, but it's comforting to know I'm not the only one in this boat now.
Thanks for reading :)

Hey Andronicus,
Do you think what you had was an advancement flap surgery?
If so, they take a long time to fully heal. There is usually an area/hole left open for drainage. Take a look at some of the posts on this forum to see if this sounds like what you had.
It's tough to know who to tell. That's why this forum is nice cause you know everyone here will understand. I have only told a handful of people as well. Two of which probably wish I'd never told them. Oh well. It is a taboo subject really, our bums.
silly isn't it?
My nine year old is big on angel gas jokes and such now-a-days and I would normally find them funny in a juvenile way, but they mostly make me wince.
A year of ones life is a long time to suffer.
Let us know what your CRS says.
Just keep making sure your BMs are soft and you are drinking a lot. Maybe get your vitamin/mineral levels tested by your regular doc to make sure you are getting enough iron and b12. A deficiency in either of those can make you feel tired and depressed.
This is all IMO of course.
Cheers, :)
Tanya

Ah, I probably should mention that I had my blood tested when I went to the doctor about getting some anti-depressants. Aside from a slightly low vitamin D level (which is understandable, considering I mainly just stay in my room these days), the rest of the bloodwork seemed relatively normal, according to the doctor. I was a bit surprised, but I guess I should be happy for that at least. Still, perhaps I should try taking some iron supplements as well, just to see if it makes a difference at all.
And yes, taboo though the subject of rectal health may be, I find myself having grown rather jaded to the subject, following the year after the manifestation of my fissure. I can appreciate that other people don't feel the same way, and try to save their minds from wandering in that direction, but after enough research into the matter with, err, appropriate diagrams, I find myself increasingly comfortable with the human body as a whole, instead of just those portions directly above the torso and from the thigh downwards. TMI? Sorry :) I feel somewhat superior, at least, in knowing that the analogy of a "pain in the rear end" holds considerably more meaning to myself than it would to most other people
Anyway, thanks for the advice!

Don't take iron unless you need it.
Too much can slow down healing.
Take some D though!
IMo
Never too much information on this website! lol!
:D
-Tanya

Hi there Andronicus,
Vitamin D can be worth while giving a try, if you are low. Uncommon in Australia, common in the dark reaches of Maine where I live. I bought drops - 2000 IU in each. Vitamin D is helpful to the bowel, I read somewhere. Have read a lot since this whole saga began, as have so many of us here.
Also, iron for a man, would not take it unless your GP says so.
My diet is very lean and boring but I have stopped losing weight so am doing ok on it. By lean I mean that I don't eat too much, but keeping pain at bay is my object, and having a BM that does not feel like a sharp pointed object on the way out is what I'm after...what we're all after.
Couple of questions:
Do you use Miralax? Not sure what it is called in Australia, but is an essential that most swear by here. Doctors like it too.
Do you get spasms after a BM? Will give you a suggestion if so.
Sorry if you've answered these above, using my phone and not always easy to see what I've written.
Sav

Hey Andronicus,
Hope you feel better soon... don't give up on excercise, unless it hurts you. I've recently had prostate infection, back problems and foot problems, not to mention the AF, and never stopped doing some kind of workout, walking, eliptical, light weights/high reps (these are killers, even for a guy who used to do heavy weights).
Don't give up... tell yourself 'i WILL get better' and keep on going. Your mind can be your worst enemy, so don't let it get the upper hand.
hang in!
pat

You are so right Pat!
I posted a link under the references subject, of a lecture on stress management. It's pretty empowering!
-Tanya