So I finally went ahead and scheduled an appointment with the out-of-state CRS that I've been emailing for the past few weeks. My appt. is scheduled for the Tuesday after Memorial Day so that my wife, daughter and I can drive to Dallas over the long weekend instead of having to fly. It will save hundreds of dollars on airfare and a rental car, so I hope it is worth it and I can handle the long drive. My wife will have to do the driving while I lye down on the seat. If the CRS still feels that LIS is recommended after the initial appt., he will most likely schedule surgery for the following day. I will plan to stay in Dallas for about 10 days post surgery and I really hope that I will be able to travel after 10 days. I am really on the fence about going through with this, because I have some major doubts about whether it will work for me and whether the recovery will be more difficult because of my underlying pelvic floor issues, but my fissure pain has been pretty bad the past few weeks and my bowel movements have been really difficult lately. It seems as though the muscles are in constant spasm and my rectum just will not open up properly to allow for an easy bowel movement. I really hope that this surgery will help to make my bm's much easier and with no straining. I think my expectations are so high that maybe I'm setting myself up to be disappointed.
Anyway, with all of these doubts and fear about the surgery, I may very well back out, but the thought that this surgery could give me at least some quality of life again, is something that I want so badly. I just fear that this surgery may not be quite as effective as I am hoping it will be.