I had botox done two weeks ago, under sedation. The first few days made me think I was healing....but nooooo, I just had to tear again. Not because of hard stools, but because of one freakishly large crap that stretched my hole to the breaking point. Ever since then, it's agonizing hell everytime I have a movement. It's like the first bit of the poop has a
bayonet poised as well as a death wish for me. It's crazy painful. But the pain goes away five minutes after the movement, and it's further releaved by a hot sitz bath. This has been going on for way too damn bloody long, I'm seriously pissed with myself. I have major board exams in ten days and here I am, sitting in the tub like a stupid loser with a torn ass. Sometimes i wish I had the courage to hold death's hand and quietly walk home with him...I just wish