You are too funny!
It would be fun to have an AF retreat. Except I don't like to go to the bathroom away from home. Guess you all have to come to my house!!! :leiamas:

Hey Fis,
My CRS said the same thing about the size of the poo. He said it was not good to have small poos because it did not excersice the muscle. That is why he told me to increase the fiber gradually so my poos were more formed and bulky. I did not like this at first cause I had quite a bit of pain with larger softer poos, but now my butt is getting use to it and each time the pain is less and less. Good luck with the surgery. I might do one more shot of Botox if I have to then LIS. I will wait and see when this second one wears off. I will be thinking about you and let me know if you need anything.
Take Care,
Patty
:snoopys:

Yooooo-hooo, party at Leca's house !!!! Should we make it pj party ; ) !!! I hate to go to other bathrooms too, that is how I got my fissure in he first place : (, BUT, I decided to work on that - I will buy I-pod so I can "plug" my ears with nice relaxing music and not hear others voices, close my eyes and imagine I am in "a safe place" ha ha ha. Really, have to brake this habit. I already assembled small packet of toiletries (travel size of all necessities), that I carry in my purse anywhere I go. Didn't have guts to use public bathroom yet, ha ha, but one step at a time. I miss that I-pod still !!!! Last time I tried to use public restroom ,oh my gosh, have to share this story ; ))) ! So, we were in San Francisco seeing my first CRS and while we were waiting for Nifedipamine creme refill we decided to take a stroll. At one point I felt like going, and my husband suggested to try Starbucks. I laughed out loud - it had one unisex stall for the whole cafe - no way I would go knowing there are 10 people out waiting for me to hurry up ! So, next suggestion was to go to nearby Hilton hotel and have some fancy seating session. I was so not for that because bell boys were all out and valet parking and everything organized for receiving guests and we had to pretend to be guests- luckily we were fancy dressed and pretended to be in some serious business convo and just entered like we "live"there. Now we found ourselves in HUGE beautiful lobby , all staked up for Halloween and still full of all kind of personnel eager to help - so again we had to pretend hat we do not need help and that we know our way. Somehow we decided to climb down one flat and voila - we found ourselves among rows of rooms and GRAND bathrooms on both sides - one for boys one for girls. NOBODY around - NOBODY in the bathroom _my dream came true. I prepared everything so nicely , wet-ones , baby wipes, vaseline, nefidapine cream for after. Fluffed up my toilet seat with 10 layers of paper, and told myself - you can do it Fiss-girl, just relax now. As soon as I relaxed entrance door open wide and MAN stormed in yelling : " Anybody here!!!???"
I was frozen for a sec - just couldn't believe it !!!!!! What the heck ???!!! "I ...am...hee..ree.." I stuttered, dazed ... "Oh, OK, I will wait, need to clean ". WHAT _ this is not happening, I mean a man, in my bathroom waiting for me to poop !!!!!???? What were the chances of THAT !!!!! I just packed all of my little paraphernalia , flushed empty toilet and left the bathroom in total disbelief !!!!!! Well, somebody "up there" had a very good laugh, VERY FUNNY, yeah ... So, that was just of my public restrooms stories, no wonder I "can't go " !!!!!
Hi PATTY : ), nice to hear from you : )))! Thanks for being here for me XOXO, and if your cat gets missing - you know where to find it ; ))) !!!
LOVE TO ALL !!!!

OMG-that is hysterical!!!! I am ROTFLMAO!!!!

Do you know what I hate???

When you are in a bathroom with dozens of stalls-I pick one that is kind of far away and sure enough out of all of the toilets somebody has to take the one next to me. I mean, there are 20 other toilets-do you have to be right next to me?

And sometimes I hear others just pooping and farting away like they just don't have a care in the world and I am thinking....why can't I be like that?

Or, what is really bad is when there is one john and you have someone right on the other side of the door waiting and it is dead silent. I mean, my bladder even freezes. I fiddle with the toiletpaper roll, dig around in my purse and sometimes just give up and flush and act like I am done.

I use to even hold it all day at school.

I love my bathroom here. There is only one potty in my home that I poop in. It turn on my fan and it is enclosed and separate from the sink and tub area and I just feel so safe.

I think I seriously need to change my name and take down my picture after all I have admitted here.

I know...I know.. When I got my first fissure I had 2 kids in the next stall. The older one was supposed to to help younger one (her Mom made her), so younger one was whining to older Sis to wipe her butt while older one was screaming at her : "Wipe your butt yourself, I am not doing it - no WAYYY !!!" " I will tell MOM"! " Oh, go ahead, tell Mom, I will not take you with me EVER, if you do!!!" "Please wipe me" !!!! " NO!!!" "Waaaaaaa...I can't do it myself" !" YES YOU CAN !!!!" "A-aaaaaa!!!!", So, I had an urge to go out with my panties down and wipe that ass already so I can have some quiet and GO! Finally MOM comes in, makes a scene , gives a lecture , that all of them wash their hands FOREVER (again - please wash my hands - no, you are big enough- no I can't reach a pump- well tough luck- Mooooooooooooooooooom !!!!!!!! ANYWAY, they go out and I said myself - Fiss - you pres now or never - and press I did !!!! The rest is history. I wish my older daughter is home to wright what she would say to that man in Hilton restroom and make him go for sure, ha ha ha, and I know she would. I am so glad that my kids are not uptight like me, they could care less about their or other people "sounds" - restroom is for pooping and making all those noises is their philosophy , ha ha ha, but I am EXACTLY like you. I even try to pee "on the side of a toilet bowl " so it would slide "silent" - what a freak !!!!!
Well - two little cute freaks, ha ha, this world would be boring without all kind of "us" here.
LU

I do the same thing with peeing too sometimes! I just hate those huge bathrooms where everything echos.
I wonder where all of this comes from? Could it be from the rigid potty training I had?

I remember in school that if you took your purse into the bathroom with you you would get teased because you must be on your period. My friends and I would say "look at my butt when I walk in front of you and make sure I haven't had an accident." One of my friends grabbed my arm and pulled me into the bathroom and said Oh my G-D! And then she started lauging caused she tricked me into thinking I had leaked through my pants. What are friends for?

I don't know : (, I know that I was REALLY potty trained when I was 1 year old !!! I don't know how my Mom managed that , but she was probably sick of washing and drying and ironing all those cotton diapers, not to mention everything else that gets wet when you don't have Pampers !!!! I know that she was very proud that both me and my sister were trained early and was in shock when her granddaughters were wearing diapers at age 2 !!!! I know though for sure that she have must done it gently because she was the best mother ever , probably just had nerves of steal and was REALLY sick of doing laundry all day long. I think that it comes from us being sensitive in general, maybe perfectionisms plays a role too - everything has to be so perfect and in order and "proper" . Just personality trait. I know also that I was expected to act as a lady since early age, eating with knife and fork in first grade, never get dirty playing outside, and saying a bad word was punishable by death - ha ha, I mean - never even tried because I was sure that would happen ; ). Now, I just hope I won't "toot" too much after LIS , ha ha, because I will become notorious lier - always blaming somebody else !!!! Do you believe that if I pass the gas even when I sleep I wake up and tighten my muscles subconsciousnesly? Maybe I need shrink after all ; ))))) !!!!!
BIG HUG to my twin across the "rock" !!!!!

Hi Fis,
sorry to hear you have another of the little devils, I hope the LIS sorts it all out for you once and for all. I think you've made the right choice with going for the surgeon with the most experience, if he's done 500 with no problems, it seems a good track record.
Wish you luck,
Val

I am so polite too. After 13 years of marriage I still don't toot in front of my husband.

I had to laugh the other day when I burped at home when I was all alone and I said outloud "excuse me" and there is no one around.

Sometimes I wish my 4 year old would just poop at home. It always seems to be in a public restroom that is just filthy!! But I don't want her to be neurotic like me. She is probably on the other end of the spectrum!

Thank you VAL for nice words of encouragement and wishing me well XOXO . I also hope so much that I will at least get rid of this pain and be able to start with my physical therapy that will than help with my Fibro. This way I am just waisting away : (. How are you doing today ?
Lecia, ha ha, I am married 25 years (got married when I was 19), and I also never make any of that stuff around anybody, not my husband or kids either, burping included ; ) ! Well - now we now why we have butt problems - don't we, ha ha ha, tight assed ladies - thats what we get in return !!! I so looking for that relaxed feeling that I had after anoscopy , ha ha ha, I was passing gas without any straining, and it made no sound either - ha ha ha, such a liberating thing !!!! And you know, since there is no sound I would be able to poop in public and I am sure it will all go out in a sec ; ). Well, nice discussion for the morning, ha ha, VERY proper , ; ))))) !!!!!