by woundedspirit » 16 Jun 2013, 06:52
Thank you so much for your kind words. They touched my heart deeply. I am a 53 year old female whose whole life changed one day after having a sigmoid scope and he "nicked" me on the way out. I exhausted all conservative treatment with no improvement and had LIS 3 months ago. I was very hopeful since informed of the 90% success rate. Unfortunatly, I am in the 10% without success due to keloid scarring from a hemorrhoidectomy 12 years ago. I educated myself about AF and most of the practical and really helpful information came from this site. I really though I was going to beat this. Saw my CRS two days ago for my 5th post op appointment. He said just keep doing what I am doing (sitz bath/tub 2xday and post BM's, Miralax every night, Norco for pain, topical Isosorbide Dinitrate, Metamucil in am, and lidocaine pre/post BM's, and healthy diet) and maybe it will still heal, but each week that passes decreases the chances. He said to keep doing these things until basically it heals or I just can't take it anymore and we could do a second LIS which I don't want to have. The surgery was not bad but my risk of incontinence is so much higher after a second that I am afraid to risk it. As of now I only deal with some leakage.
I am loosing hope though. Everytime I sit down to urinate I can feel it break open again and it hurts. So believe it or not I am trying to learn to stand and go! ( I will do anything to heal this).It is too much to think about having to live the rest of my life like this. I have a wonderful life, married for 24 years with two awesome grown children and I so wish to resume what life was like prior to this. I did seek therapy and I am supposed to change my internal dialog to help such as instead of saying "this is a gift straight from hell" say "this is my daily challenge" or instead of saying "God please help me get through this painful BM" say "God I know you will help me get through this" etc. It helps at times and I have learned some tools to deal with it all, but unless you live it, you just don't know what a physical and psychological toll it can take.
Thats why last night in my hour of desperation I just had to connect with someone who knows. God bless whoever started this site because last night it just helped me get my head together and I will continue to post here now to help myself and to hopefully help someone else. Thank you again so much.
Hemorrhoid Surgery
Scar Tissue
2 Anal Fissures
Failure of All Topical Treatments
Failed LIS
[size=85]EUA and Fissurectomy
Hoping to avoid Flap Surgery