I am turning to the kind people here for some suggestions. Saturday we are celebrating our 25th wedding anniversary. It is going to be a long day. My husband was so sweet to plan a really special day including re-creating our wedding photos at the church we got married in, brunch, and a gathering at the hotel and the and the same honeymoon suite we stayed on our wedding night. And I am in the worst shape I have been since this whole fissure problems started. I don't know how I am going to make it through. I thought I might almost stop eating a couple days before and take as much pain meds as I need to get through but I don't want to be zoned out for my pictures and seeing everyone. It was so sweet of my hubby to do this but we kind of talked about it a few years ago and I just couldn't tell him no. I don't know how best to prepare for this day to get through. Any thoughts?

I will pack all the things I can think of that I might need. I am really asking for your prayers. I really don't know how I am going to make it through this and try to enjoy this special day. I will also double up on Mirilax but if I don't eat enough it makes my stomach bloat and my dress will feel uncomfortable. As soon as this is over I have to see if I can get my doctor appt moved up because I am not doing well at all. The slightest BM causes so much pain and bleeding. This is making me so sad.

Wounded, My prayers will be with you and I'm sending all the positive vibes.


My advice: relax relax relax! I know it's so easy to say but so hard to do but try to focus on you and your husband. The night before you go I'd have a long bath. I don't mean a sitz here, I mean light some candles, put some salt in and if you have any oils you use that don't agro your bum put those in. Stick some relaxing music on and try to take some time out to yourself, after see if your hubby would like to give you a massage. Take a stool softener before bed (magnesium/lactulose etc) and apply any soothing creams you have that work, I like honey/aloe before sleeping. I'd also advise 2 paracetamol before bed!

The day of the event, wake up early, have a hot cup of water, a sitz or shower and see if your body needs to go to the loo but remember the Vaseline first! - hopefully the stool softeners would have kicked in by then.
Wear comfortable clothes for the drive and change when you get there. I find the type of clothing I wear affects the pain level - I'm guessing down to the sweat. Remember to take regular breaks if it's a long drive, try to stretch your legs every 10 miles or so just to keep the blood flow going and relieve sphincter pressure. I also take a pre-chilled 1.5 Litre of water with me on drives and a cushion to sit on.

Honesty is the best policy with hubby and talk to him about the pain - don't push through it! Savour the romantic moment and enjoy eachothers company. Use pain relief when you need it and when you get to the function if there is a shower I find it a big help to use that on a mild setting around the area for symptom control.

I try to follow the belief that relaxation and meditation helps with pain and it's what I did the night before my driving test to try to get me through the pain of being sat on the car seat for an hour and it did help!

My thoughts and prayers are with you, keep the faith and try to relax - don't work yourself up or you could get constipated!

Congratulations on your 25th anniversary! and don't forget, your husband loves you for you and he's showing it through this trip away, I hope you have a fantastic time and your bum gives you a bit of a break.
Big hugs and positive vibes

J x

Thanks so much fissurefrustration. I love all those suggestions! I do need to just relax, prepare the best I can and let be what will be and enjoy any good moment I can. The good news is it is not far, just into the city. I had a little better day today, the first in many days and I am feeling a little hopeful.

Congrats on 25 years of marriage!!

You know... I usually feel better when I'm busy, so I'm guessing you will be so busy you won't notice your bum as much. Don't try and eat differently or mess with your mirilax dose, just carry on as normal. Maybe use a little local anaesthetic cream?? Take painkillers on waking, and at regular times of the day to keep on top of the worst of the pain.
Remember to drink enough throughout the day... Maybe stash a couple of bottles of water in the car so they are there if you feel you haven't drank enough.
Enjoy the day.... You are a lucky lady who sounds like she is loved and cherished very much!!

OMB xxxx

I hope you have a wonderful time. FF has some good suggestions, and I think OMB is right - keeping busy should take your mind off things.

I just want to add from my experience of going on a long road trip and camping with my fissure the summer before last. Yes I was in pain a lot of the time, and it did limit what my family could do. No hike up Angel's Landing in Zion National Park for them, because they wouldn't leave me by myself for that long.

BUT, what do I remember of that trip now? Not the pain, but the amazing things we saw and did. The loving care of my husband, the patience of my children (who hated hearing the word "anus" but were nevertheless sympathetic and understanding. I do not regret it one bit.

OMB - Thank you. And you are so right!! I did not even think of that. That is the most likely thing I will do is forget to drink adequate water!! Thank you for reminding me. I am going to tie a little ribbon on my purse to keep reminding myself. I think I will also count out water bottles and make sure I have drank them all before I go to bed. I will be sure to bring the lidocaine along with a whole bag of fissure care items. I hope the pain is not debilitating. I am lucky and feel loved. :) And also I decided to keep to normal routine with eating and Mirilax. You are right, that is most sensible! I think I was getting a little panicky.

Scientist - thank you too. It REALLY lifts my heart to hear that you were still able to take the best out of life despite the fissure. That is what I am hoping for. Even if it is a bad pain day, I can endure it and in the end have some wonderful memories too. These fissures take so much out of our lives. I will win the battle that day no matter what!!! BTW that is so funny about the kids and the word "anus". lol. :)

Just kind of a funny story. I was going through all of our wedding stuff from 25 years ago and started looking through all the wedding cards we received. Believe it or not I found a $100.00 gift card that we somehow left in one of the cards!

Wow! I hope it was still valid!