I've been reading the forum for weeks but am finally de-lurking.
I've had hemorrhoids off and on for a number of years, especially with my second and third pregnancies, also a big honking (and unnecessary) episiotomy with ds1 that tore open again with dd1. Horrible hemorrhoids during and after my second and third pregnancies, too. Even though dd2 (third and last baby) is now 6 years old, my nether regions are still a horror show! I keep on getting thrombosed hemorrhoids off and on, I have several sentinel piles, and I have a decent sized rectocele that, combined with very high tone in my inner sphincter, has led to today's current state -- pretty much in pain all the time from a fissure that won't heal and spasms that won't quit. The latest flare has been going on since Memorial Day weekend and I am so over it and ready not to be in pain all. the. time.
I finally got in to see a CRS several weeks ago, and am going back to see her on July 16th. She put me on nifedipine/lidocaine, which honestly seemed like it made things worse -- the burning was intolerable. I'm also on two different muscle relaxants -- Flexeril and Zanaflex -- and taking 800 mg of ibuprofen three times a day. And yet it still HURTS! I already eat a really high fiber diet -- supplementing with fiber doesn't seem to do much for me, but the combination of a rectocele (i.e. pooched out rectum with low tone) and a high tone sphincter makes having a BM really hard even though I'm not technically constipated.
I feel like if I spend any more time in the bathtub, I'm going to turn into a mermaid! I've been working at home for the last week or so (yay for a super flexible boss) but I really have to get into the office tomorrow, and I'm terrified about being at the office, 45 minutes to an hour away from my bathtub!
I am so ready to commit to Botox or LIS. I'm also thinking of combining LIS surgery with rectocele surgery -- I think I'm too chicken to do them separately, but it seems like I need to get more than just the spasming sphincter fixed to get my system back on track.
I'm also thinking I need real painkillers. I just can't function with my family or my work -- I feel like I've checked out of both because the pain is so distracting and not under control.
I'm looking forward to learning more from the forums! I wish they didn't need to exist but I'm so glad to have them as a resource.